Perfect Mismatch
by Shino87
Summary: For many, I am the villain that turned Nick Burkhartd's life upside down. But, nobody has ever cared about my feelings or the reasons why I did what I did. Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not saying I was totally innocent in the mess that the Grimm's life has become. I'm just saying that I've had my share of suffering as well. You are about to Enter Adalind's head. Enjoy the ride
1. Chapter 1

When I was a little girl, my mom used to tell me bedtime stories, quite a common thing moms do with their kids, except I was different from the others and my bedtimes stories weren't fairytales. I wasn't supportive of the prince charming who saved the lady in distress and killed the wicked witch.

I was the wicked witch…a Hexenbiest is a more accurate name

I was raised in fear of the Grimm who would come after me if I was a bad little girl and the more I grew up, the more he terrified me. As years passed by, I came to the conclusion that I wasn't likely to come across one. Little did I know, I'd end up having a Grimm's baby.

But, I'm going a little ahead on my story here. How about I start from the beginning? From the moment I met Nick Burkhardt, i.e The Grimm. Don't worry though, I'll make it quick.

Nobody has ever tried to know the story from my point of view. So here goes nothing

 **Portland, 6 years ago**

"Oh My God, you were amazing, Adalind" Cynthia Sommers, one of my fellow colleagues exclaims as we head outside the court room. I must admit I'm pretty proud of myself too. My client has just been awarded damages worth a million dollars in a lawsuit nobody believed I could win. Cherry on the cake; it was a Pro bono. So, yay me

"Thanks Cynthia" I say smiling as we walk outside the building. There's a small breeze that caresses my hair "What a beautiful day" I sigh "Want to grab lunch and eat in the park?"

Cynthia checks her watch before sending me an apologetic smile "Can't. I have to meet a client in a little less than 45 minutes" she sips some more coffee from her foam cup

She glances behind her back then back at me "Hey, don't look, but there's a hotty checking you out over there. Maybe you'll have a lunch companion after all" she giggles

I laugh as we part ways, however, I can't help but cast a glance in the direction of the guy Cynthia mentioned. Two men standing against a car are staring at me. One of them is tall, about 6ft2 maybe. He's got a beautiful dark complexion and a contagious smile. The second one is a bit shorter and Oh so cute. He's got this fair baby skin, nice disheveled hair, full lips and his eyes…Holly shit…How is that possible?

He's a grim

How do I know that? Scary black eyes, Duh

I'm so scared, I vogue instinctively. It's a protection mechanism I guess and the Grimm looks back at me in utter shock. I need to get out of here and fast.

As soon as I arrive to the safety of my car, I dial Sean Renard's number, Portland Police Captain…and maybe my love interest as well. But, let's leave the complicated unrequited love for later.

"Adalind" he answers in his deep voice

"There's a…Oh My God, there's one here. I saw him like two minutes ago. He was right in front of me" I shriek not making sense even to myself

He clears his throat clearly annoyed "There's what here?"

"A Grimm. There's a Grimm in Portland. I saw him and he most definitely saw me vogue. Is he going to come after me? like slay me or something. OMG, I don't want to die. I mean, there are so many things I want to experience and…" I tend to babble a lot when I'm nervous and right now, I'm on the verge of a mental breakdown. Yeah, a Grimm does that to you when you are raised to believe he is your apocalypse.

Sean, obviously running out of patience, not that he has much of it, cuts me off "Calm down Adalind, it's under control"

Now, that takes me by surprise "You knew about him?" I ask, completely incredulous at the revelation

"For a while. I have an eye on him, tough and…" I can imagine him running a hand in his hair "I'm going to need your help, actually"

Want to know which kind of help he wanted?

He wanted me to get rid of the Grimm's aunt/surrogate mom. The woman who raised him as her own child. The woman who was transferring her powers to him and, more importantly, a woman in her death bed.

Did I want to do it? Definitely not. Was I on board anyway? Yes

The reason why I accepted was Sean Renard himself. He had leverage, something that was definitely playing against me. My feelings for him

Sean Renard is a Zauberbiest, sort of a male version of a Hexenbiest. He's the result of an affair between a royal and a hexenbiest.

After that first encounter with the Grimm, Sean decided to use me for his own interests and I followed his plans because…well, because I thought that he could finally see what a fantastic woman I am and fall deeply madly in love with me. Remember how I told you my mom didn't read me fairytales? Well, my life isn't a fairytale either.

And now we get to the unrequited love part. Sean never fell in love with me. The guy even slept with my mother and by committing to his and my mother's schemes I made a major enemy…The Grimm

Some might think I could have simply said a big fat NO to my mother. Nuh…Uh, my life is not that simple.

Growing in the shadow of a seemingly perfect Catherine Schade who expects always more from you isn't exactly the life one would wish for. No matter how hard I worked to earn my mother's love, I was just a means to an end.

When I graduated with honors from law school, my mom came to me after the ceremony and kissed my forehead tenderly "Oh, sweetheart. I'm so glad. Now you can finally concentrate on more serious things" she smiled. More serious things meaning, to be a full time Hexembiest.

Adalind Schade was a nobody. I existed only as the Hexenbiest for those around me. I even ended up believing my powers were everything.

So when Nick Burkhardt took them from me. Things kind of escalated to a whole new level. I'm not proud of the collateral damage I caused afterwards, as most of it backfired at me.

I wanted Nick Burkhard to pay for what he did to me. So, I made a spell that caused his girlfriend a memory loss, actually she only forgot about him, but things went back to normal after a while. Although, there were some complications along the way, but, let's not talk about that, now.

In order to get my powers back, I slept with Sean Renard when he was most vulnerable. Traveled to Europe, mingled with the royals, made a pact with the devil, got pregnant with Sean's semi royal baby that I was ready to give away as soon as I got my powers back and I ended up under the resistance protection when I decided I loved my baby too much to give it away.

That's a hell of a lot, huh

When I looked in my baby's eyes for the first time, I felt an explosion of emotions. I was so overwhelmed by this new alien feeling, that I couldn't spend a second away from her. I understood for the first time that it was possible to love someone more than yourself. But the royals had other plans for my daughter Diana. They wanted my baby no matter what. Martin Meisner, a member of the resistance was the only person I trusted. He risked his life to help me go back to the US and another unexpected figure played a major role in my daughter's safety. Another Grimm.

Kelly Burkhardt. Nick's mom

Back to Portland, things got a little out of hand. Sean, Kelly, Nick, Juliette and their friends Rosalee and Monroe worked together to take my daughter from me. They said it was for her protection, but, it wasn't their decision to make. Having your baby taken away from you, feels like experiencing a slow painful death every second, every minute, every hour of every day.

I would wake up screaming in the middle of the night because I relived her painful disappearance in my dreams. Diana, my baby, my lovely baby, was gone. No matter how much I searched for her, I couldn't find her. It's like she disappeared from the surface of the planet.

So the pain became extreme anger and fury. It's like I lost it a little bit every day. I wanted revenge. I wanted those involved in my daughter's kidnapping to hurt as much as I did. Starting by Nick Burkhardt.

There were two very important elements in Nick's life; Juliette and his powers, so I decided to ruin both.

When nick took my powers from me, he kissed me, I bit him, got his blood in my system and Tadaa. No more Hexenbiest. One would think the opposite would work as well, no such luck.

For the Grimm to lose his powers, he needs to sleep with a Hexenbiest. I wasn't thrilled about it, but I was determined. It wasn't going to be easy, I mean, let's be honest here. I couldn't knock at his door and say "Surprise, want to celebrate our reunion by having a sex fest?"

Yeah! Didn't think so either

Fortunately for me, my mom's grimoire had the answer. A simple spell to take Juliette's appearance. Genius, right!

But before going to Nick's, I wanted to mess with Sean's head first. He's had a crush on Juliette since he played prince charming and woke her from her comatose state back when I sort of erased her memory.

Really, I don't get what they all like about this woman. Anyway, we're getting a bit sidetracked here.

The day of Rosalee and Monroe's wedding, I went to Nick's place, when I was sure nobody would be there. Had sex with the Grimm, while he believed I was his annoying Juliette and Voilà.

I must admit, it wasn't as bad as I expected. I mean the guy has some good moves…Ok, ok, he is very good in bed. But, it doesn't change the fact that I hate him

After things went according to my plans, I flied back to Austria, determined more than ever to find Diana, but, shockingly, my daughter wasn't with the royals. My first mistake was to threaten them. Well, let me tell you one thing. Don't try to be a smartass with the royals. It won't work. Believe me, I ended up in a cell for doing this. It was when I was held captive in the royal dungeon, that I experienced my first episode, sort of. I had this extremely painful headache. One minute I was in a cell, with rats for only companions and the next I was in Nick's house surrounded by Juliette and the Blutbad, Monroe.

Once I came to terms with the royals, admitting we pursued the same objective, i.e finding Diana. I started working with them.

Finding my daughter was all that mattered. My sanity depended on it.

Viktor, a member of the royal family in charge of searching for Diana, decided we should fly back to Portland. Following some clues. Once there, however, I made two very bad discoveries. One: Juliette became a Hexenbiest and two: I was pregnant with Nick's baby.

Haha Right?

Well, life has a great sense of humor and Karma is a b****

Through the information I collected here and there, I learnt that Nick got his powers back thanks to Juliette going through a counter spell. Which meant, she had to take the potion to have my appearance and sleep with her darling Grimm.

Phewww I'm not sure I like the idea of Nick seeing my naked body. But, hey, there are bigger things at stake here.

Meanwhile, Viktor is replaced by Cruel/ scary Kenneth. He'd actually be quite lovable with his chiseled face if he wasn't a big villain. No matter how hard I tried to hide my pregnancy, he's quick to notice it and calls me on my lie when I claim it's Viktor's baby. Hey, don't judge. Do you know what would happen if I go around telling royals or even Wessen I'm carrying the Grimm's baby? Well, neither do I and I don't want to know.

The bad news, I know, I haven't delivered any good news either, but that's not the point, so where was I? Ah, the bad news! Ms Juliette 2.0, you know, the powerful Hexenbiest wants to kill me and my baby.

I won't lie, having another baby scares the shit out of me. I'm still dealing with the trauma of losing my Diana and here I am, expecting again and running away from the eminent danger that Juliette represents to my Baby's life…and mine

The other thing that has me worried about this pregnancy is that I have no idea what my baby will be. A grimm? A Hexenbiest? A Grimmenbiest/Hexengrimm?

When I see that Kenneth has no intention to protect me, there's only one person I can think of to assume this responsibility. Nick

I have to tread cautiously though. When I break the news to him, I know he won't fall to his knees and tell me that it's the happiest day of his life before he laces our hands together and sing Kumbaya. But I have to try. So here I am, in Sean's office, exchanging uncomfortable glances with the man I once loved and my daughter's father. He certainly wasn't thrilled about my pregnancy with Nick, but he was decent enough not to say a thing.

Nick enters the Office and as soon as he spots me, he glares accusingly at Sean "What the hell is she doing here?"

"Ask her" Sean orders

"I'm not asking her anything, I'm done with her, she ruined Juliette's life" Nick spits vehemently

His words feel like a stab in the heart. I'm not surprised but I don't want him to hate me for the sake of our baby "I didn't know that would happen" and that's the truth but he ignores me and heads to the door "wait, Nick" I beg. I'm desperate. I don't want my baby to have the same fate as his sister's. I'll do whatever it takes to protect it

"What?" he yells

He turns around and I expose my swelling belly to him

"Again" he sighs in Sean's Direction

The police Captain shakes his head and waves a dismissive hand "That's not mine"

"It's yours" I admit finally

"Are you crazy" he laughs "It's impossible"

"Impossible! Don't I wish" I sigh

He looks at me like I've grown two heads "Remember that wild afternoon with Juliette, before Monroe and Rosalee's wedding"

His face pales in sudden understanding

"This is not something that I wanted, either. I'm pregnant Nick" I feel the need to defend my self

Sean walks my way "Look, I had no idea, believe me and I don't think she's making it up, either"

"I've already had one child taken from me and I won't lose another" I hiss, then look in Sean's direction "Even he wouldn't protect his child last time" and the betrayal hurt as much as losing my daughter but I keep that to myself. I'm fighting the tears that built in my eyes.

"I did what I thought was best for Diana" he defends himself

I rise my arms dramatically "Oh yeah, it's a room full of heroes" I say sarcastically then turn to nick "and now I need one" well here goes nothing "I need you, Nick" it takes me lots of courage to admit it

"What do you want from me?" he wonders

"I need you to protect me from Juliette"

"Why the hell would I do that" he's quick to answer and I was prepared for this

"I don't expect you to do this for me, I was hoping you do it for your child" I place my palm on my belly "but if not for that, maybe you'll do it for Juliette"

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Author's note: Hi Hexenreaders, so I've wanted to write a Nadalind Fanfiction for a while now, but I kept finding excuses not to, until today. These two are like an It couple to me. Hope you enjoyed the chapter and I'd love to read your thoughts. Xx


	2. Chapter 2

The main goal in negotiation is to reach a mutually beneficial agreement and in order to do so, you need to go through a give and take process.

What seemed to be until now a conversation in my disadvantage has moved to a new level with my shifting gears. Remember how I told you that Nick Burkardt was only affected by two main points in his life? Well, here I'm using one of them…again. Except that this time, instead of using his weakness to hurt him, I'm using it to save my ass and more importantly, make sure nothing happens to my baby.

So yeah, blame me all you want for putting salt on the Grimm's wound by bringing up his Hexenbiest wannabe of a girlfriend, but, I'm ready to do anything and risk everything for my baby's life.

As soon as I mention her name, interest sparks in his eyes "For Juliette? You've got to be kidding me" he breathes

"I know a way to help her" I'm quick to add

He shifts on his legs, clearly stressed by this great load of information I'm throwing at him all of a sudden, but there's unmistakable hope in his eyes "I don't believe anything that you say"

He wants me to elaborate. To convince him and this is exactly what I'm going to do

"Do you think I would risk coming here if I didn't have anything?" I'm a lawyer for God's sake. I never go anywhere unprepared. My next moves are always planned ahead. Why do they keep forgetting it? Oh, right…because, I'm nothing but a Hexenbiest in their eyes.

Well, I'm not complaining about that right now. At least, I have the element of surprise

"Look I'm not promising anything and you have to understand that there's no way to cure her completely" I cringe when I say this last piece of information, I can see his hope faltering

"Then what's the point for all this" his nose flares

"Because, there is a way to suppress the Hexenbiest in her" I'm praying internally he accepts

"But, she'll still be one, so what good will suppressing it do?" I still see interest in his soft green eyes

"Well, a lot, if it works"

This gets him clearly irritated "If it works?" he looks between Sean and me "Yeah, I've heard that before. What kind of side effects this time" he huffs

I run to him in an attempt to reassure him and gain his trust about this. I'm so distressed. I'm trying to help him, can't he see that? I'm trying to help my son too, sure, but still…

"This isn't about changing her, this is so that she can live a normal…" I hesitate a moment, unsure as to what the Grimm wants "If that's what you want, life" Yeah, this is how little I know about my baby's father. At, least I would tell Diana, when I finally find her, that I've been in love with her father at some point. But this baby right here inside of me? Well, not much to say about his father.

Sean seems skeptical about what I've just stated as he walks to his desk "We've been through the book that you used, there's nothing in the book we found about what you are saying"

Really, Sean? I want to yell at him but I manage miraculously to keep calm "it's not in the book specifically. My mother's aunt told me about it when my mother was going through a very tough time" I admit "she didn't end up doing it, but there is a way" I look in Sean's direction "It's not easy and there is one ingredient that's almost impossible to get"

Sean crosses his arms over his chest "What is it?" he asks

"A dead Hexenbiest" I sigh

The Grimm appraises me "That shouldn't be too hard to get"

Yeah, thank you. As if I didn't feel threatened enough by his mad girlfriend.

I'm only too pleased when I tell him that the body mustn't be fresh "Besides, if anything happens to me, you'll be stuck with Juliette the way she is forever" I take a moment to let this sink in "now, if you're good with that then fine, but, it just so happens that I know where a dead Hexenbiest is buried…that would be my mother" I have just played my last card "Your mother killed her, remember?" I ask the Grimm "and you slept with her" I stare accusingly at Sean who looks uncomfortable.

Yeah. This is just how twisted my life is. My mom, who slept with the father of my first born was killed by my second baby's father's mother. I can see you are getting lost here, so let me rephrase it. Nick's mother, Kelly killed my mom. I didn't really have time to grieve my mother, because a series of bad things happened afterwards. I came to terms with Kelly Burkhardt however, when she helped save me and my daughter Diana from the royals, although I will never admit it to Nick, I'm grateful to his mother and I might even like her. Wow, right!

I explain to the two men what else I'm going to need to make the potion and ask Nick to convince his friend Rosalee to help me. She owns a spice shop downtown and she is, by far, the best potion maker I've ever heard of, although I know she won't be thrilled to be in the same room as me. I wouldn't be happy to be in the same room as a woman who I considered a threat for so long.

For a split second, I imagine what it would be like to be in the same room as Juliette right now. It would look like a scene from a bloody horror movie.

Just when I'm about to say something else, the baby kicks me, making me smile. Diana used to kick me too but not as hard as him. He does that more and more and he's so strong. How do I know it's a HE? some might wonder. Well, I wanted to know the gender of my baby. We live in a modern world.

Nick's face is devoid of any emotion as I tell him he's about to father a boy. I'm happy to deliver the news, because, I'm simply happy to be having a baby and to be a mother once again. I've loved this baby the moment I realized he was here. No matter how chaotic my relationship with his father is.

I don't think twice as I move towards Nick, wanting to share this moment of pure happiness with him. A naïve part of me assumed he would want to feel it, but he looks away and backs as far from me as he can when I try to reach him. His reaction hurts because I don't want this baby to feel hated or rejected because of the bad decisions his parents made. The disgust he feels towards me is palpable and feels like a stab, even though I've never cared about his opinion of me before, but now is different.

"He's yours" I say with pleading eyes, hoping the hurt I feel from his reaction doesn't reach the innocent child that's inside of me. Nick looks finally my way, anger in his eyes "Whether you accept this child or not, that will never change" I place my hands on my belly once again and his eyes follow the movement, trying to process what I have just said, but, I'm sick, sick of being blamed for any possible misfortune in their lives, sick of being accused of ruining everything, sick of being treated like I carry leper, sick of being constantly on the dock, when they are no better.

"You all act like I'm responsible for everything" I yell in anger looking at both Nick and Sean "but I only did what I did to you because you took my child from me" I add in a softer voice, afraid to burst into tears from the anguish I feel when I talk about Diana.

Nick looks away, probably getting my point.

My baby kicks me again, either sensing my distress or getting excited from being around his father. I'm so proud of how strong he is. Just like his father, I realize. For some reason and I will totally blame it on hormones, I reach for Nick's hand, wanting to share this moment of happiness with him. Wanting him to get acquainted with his baby and fall in love with him just like it happened to me, no matter how crazy this whole situation seems. Nick however doesn't seem to share my point and backs away, fisting his hand so hard his knuckles become white. But I'm not giving up, I reach again for his hand using more strength this time, as his palm is placed on my belly, I see his eyes soften just a little bit, but it's enough to relieve my worries.

I'm not sure I would have told Nick I was carrying his child, if I didn't need him to protect me. I was ready to raise my baby all on my own. I'm not afraid to be a single mother and I know for sure I can give him as much love as he needs, but when I saw Nick, I realized I wanted him to love this baby. Now, don't get me wrong, I don't expect anything from my baby's father except for him to ensure our safety, I came here seeking protection after all, but I grew up without a paternal figure, my father left when I was only four. He never looked back and never contacted me. I don't do emotions very well and I certainly don't talk easily about my feelings. But, I don't want my son to think he's not wanted, just like I felt for year after my father abandoned us.

Nick removes his hand quickly "I'll take you to Rosalee, but I don't know if she'll help" he opens the door and I follow him. Everybody is staring at us in the precint, but I'm ignoring the curious stares landing our way.

"This was a big shock to me too, it never occurred to me that something like this…" I inform Nick, not wanting him to think I planned all this. Under normal circumstances, I wouldn't care what the Grimm thinks, but let's be honest here, there's nothing normal about our situation.

The moment I made the very difficult decision to ask for Nick's help, I understood he was going to be part of my life, whether I like it or not.

Nick cuts me off, stating angrily "It happened"

I sigh. Really, why is this guy such a pain in the neck? I can't even use the 'I didn't conceive this baby alone' excuse.

He would probably hand me to Juliette on a silver platter if he was given the opportunity. Speaking of the devil, as soon as we head towards the exit, we come face to face with Madame Juliette in person. I stop dead in my tracks

Wicked baby witches! Has she always looked this scary. Both Nick and I take a step back as we see Juliette/Hexenbiest/Nick's girlfriend…I can certainly add many other slashes to describe her, but let's stop here. So, Juliette spots me and she goes berserk. I have the power to bring out the worst in people, without even trying…sometimes.

"You really are going to have a baby?" she asks

Well, duh. Don't you see the swelling belly and everything?

I know better that to tell her this, though

"Well congratulations" she adds

I don't think she's expecting us to thank her. I'm not inviting her to the baby shower, that's for sure.

She takes determined strides towards us and I hide instinctively behind Nick. I wouldn't trust him with my life, under other circumstances, but I can help him save Juliette and he needs me alive for that purpose, so right now, I know he won't let anything happen to me.

"I should have finished you when I had the chance" she flares

I cringe at the bad memory. It was when I made that very bad discovery I told you about. You know! When I realized Juliette became a Hexenbiest. Well, the wicked woman almost killed me. Ok, maybe I broke into her house and I might or might not have told her that my intercourse with her sweetheart was something, but…Ok, no 'but' here

Sweet baby witches, even Nick looks scared of her

"Keep her away from Nick" I plead while still hiding behind his back and backing away

"Oh, don't you two make a cute couple" Juliette observes

Would it help if I told her there's absolutely nothing between Nick and me? we're not even close to a couple, I want to clarify. But, I'm sure she'd hate me anyway.

Nick talks her into leaving me alone, but she doesn't listen, so I decide to try to convince her I can actually be useful to her. Maybe, she'd come to her senses and we'd become Bff's…Maybe not Bff's

"Juliette, listen to me" I hiss " I have a way of helping you"

"I've had enough of your help" she spits

Nick blocks me with his back "Nothing is gonna happen here" he motions to the door "Juliette, I'm sorry, but you're going to have to leave" he tells her softly, but she doesn't listen and starts threatening me attracting some more unnecessary attention around us.

Nick finally grabs her arm to stop her from coming after me, but it only makes things worse "You're choosing her over me" she murmurs

"It's not what I'm doing"

"Then, get out of my way"

It's really starting to feel like a soap opera.

Finally, a policeman I've seen more than once hanging out with nick barges in "Everything ok here, Nick?" he wonders

Nick nods "I'm just working something out"

Wait, what? Is he insane or something. This woman clearly wants to rip my throat and feed me to the sharks and he says we're just working something out

"We're not working anything out, she needs to leave" I whisper yell

"She's right, I do need to leave" she informs Nick "We'll catch up later" she says my way and I don't miss the double innuendo

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A/N: Hi Hexenreaders, hope you liked this second chapter. I'd be happy to read your thoughts about it, so please, don't hesitate to post a review. Xx. Shino87


	3. Chapter 3

Rosalee and Monroe weren't exactly happy to see me and you could only imagine their surprise when they learnt I was expecting Nick's baby, but being who they were, in other words 'nice', they accepted to help suppress to Hexenbiest in Juliette.

Nick left with Monroe, Hank and Wu as soon as he dropped me off. Rosalee's distaste is obvious as we work together on the potion in the back room of her spice shop. She glares at me from time to time, flashing an unhappy expression until I can't take it anymore and finally break the silence.

"You don't trust me" I state the obvious

She scowls at me "Why should I?"

"Because, I'm just trying to protect myself and my baby from being killed by Juliette. You've seen what she is now" i.e a killing machine

"I have" she spits vehemently and that's all I need to lose my patience. Really, why do all these people think I'm evil in person? Why don't they ever cut me some slacks? I might have been hell on heels for a while, but things have changed…I have changed

"Do you think I've planned all this" I yell in frustration

"I don't" she answers quickly "How is this potion supposed to work?" back to business

Yeah, right! We're only here to find a way to help 'poor Juliette' and you heard it right, it's definitely sarcasm

"I don't know how it works, I just know that it should" I say honestly

"I wish it was a little more sure than should" Rosalee hisses angrily

"It's not like I do this kind of stuff everyday" I snap at her, losing my countenance "You know what? I was a perfectly happy lawyer just minding my own business before Nick's aunt came to town"

"I really doubt his aunt is responsible for what happened" Rosalee glares at me while adding some spices to the concoction

"That's not what I'm saying" I start to say, then just decide to drop the topic "what's the point? You all hate me anyway"

Rasalee gives me that look that says 'damn right, girl', but despite my better judgment, I decide to carry on "You know, I did side with the resistance and come back here with Nick's mom, Diana…" I hesitate a moment before continuing "I trusted you…remember when I was staying at your house…I thought you were trying to help me" when I first met them, I was surprised to realize they were a couple…I mean a Fuchsbau and a Blutbad! Interracial couples aren't exactly welcome in the Wesen world. I've heard of secret organizations punishing these couples for what they consider being a sin. Personally, I've never thought of it as a big deal. As long as they love each other, why would anyone have a say on it and Rosalee and Monroe do love each other. You don't need more than five minutes with them to figure that out. I remember envying their relationship when I was staying with them. If things were different, I thought I would want to be friends with people like these. People ready to risk their lives to help those they care for. Then, they helped take my daughter from me and everything collapsed around me.

Rosalee sighs and nods to me "I don't feel good about what we did, but it was necessary to protect your child" she looks at me with sorry eyes "what's left?"

"Just my mother" I answer

"Ok, when do we get her?" she wonders, all business

I try to hide my fear and anxiety. I'm about to dig my own mother's grave and dissect her body to suppress a Hexenbiest. She won't be thrilled about that "We dig her up tomorrow"

Just when I answer Rosalee, we hear the front door open. The guys come in, carrying dusty books, weapons and antics I don't recognize.

"What's all that" Rosalee asks in surprise

"Things from the trailer" Monroe answers while heading back to the door

"Things that weren't destroyed" Hank chimes in. Only making us more confused

"Yeah, we are lucky there's anything left" the short policeman with Asian features, who I've heard them call Wu admits

"What happened to the trailer?" Rosalee asks in disbelief

"Juliette" Nick is covered in ash and looks completely disheveled and restless

"She torched it" Wu clarifies

She did what? Have I just peed in my panties? I'll put that on the baby's kicks account

"If she did that to the trailer, what would she do to me?" I ask in shock

Hanks turns to me "You mean besides killing you"

Very funny Hank. Thanks for stating the obvious

"Does anybody know where Juliette is?" Rosalee wonders

"No" Nick answers before turning his serious expression on me "we need to find you someplace safe, you can't stay here the night" he looks at the rest of the group "I can't take her to my house, that's the first place where Juliette will look"

"My place would be the second" Hank is quick to add

"Well, she's not staying at our place" Monroe informs us "Sorry, I mean same problem" yeah right. Nobody wants to be stuck with the pregnant Hexenbiest. Great.

"Err after eating Adalind's cookies and devouring half my carpet, I'm not all that keen but whatever you guys need" yeah, I should probably tell you about that. I kind of, sort of, gave a charmed cookie to Hank at some point, when I tried to seduce him to get back at Nick and for some reason, the cookies ended up in Wu's possession and it had a weird effect on the poor guy.

"Where's the last place Juliette will look?" Rosalie asks

I almost see a bulb lightening on Nick's head as he looks at me "I have an Idea"

As I hop in the car with him and Hank, Nick explains that he has this friend Bud Wurstner, a Eisbiber, who could help. Apparently, he called him as soon as he had this idea and the guy was happy to oblige. So here I am, on my way to spend the night at a stranger's place, while persecuted by a lethal Hexenbiest.

Bud is exactly like I imagined him. Short, chubby and very talkative. As soon as we get to his place, he informs Nick that he followed all the instructions he gave him to ensure my safety.

"This is Adalind Schade" Nick introduces me to Bud who shakes my hand eagerly "Adalind, very nice to meet you, any friend of Nick's is a friend of mine" We're not exactly friends but I'll let him think whatever he wants as long as I can stay here

Nick and Hank make sure with Bud that nobody knows about my being here, but then, the Eisbiber shifts his attention to me, motioning to my very pregnant state and starts babbling about his wife's pregnancies and kids and just when I think he's finally dropping the subject he asks me if my baby's father likes pie. When I see Nick has no intention on telling him who the father is, I decide to have some fun. Hey, I deserve a laugh

"Do you like pie?" I ask Nick

Nick sends me a deadly glare

"Oh nick" Bud, who I think is starting to grow on me, deadpans "Oh Nick! He loves pies, hold on I don't think she knows what I mean" he tells Nick

Nick cuts him off "She knows what you meant"

The guys explain to Bud how Juliette wants me dead and he looks at me like he finally got it, when actually he doesn't have a clue. I'm not some mistress who had an affair with a guy and stole him from his girlfriend, but this is exactly the look Bud sends my way.

Add 'couple crusher' to my long list of sins.

The next day, I do something I never thought I'd ever have to endure in my life…even less volunteer to do. Get ready to use my dead mother's heart in a potion. However, when they get her coffin from under the ground, I can't just ignore the pain that I feel. I've never had the chance to say goodbye, as she kicked me out when Nick took my powers from me. Remember how I told you how I was nothing but a Hexenbiest to her? Well, her reaction back then just proved my point. Yet, here I am, about to give her my farewell.

My heart is hammering against my chest as I start to tell her about what happened the past months. Jeez, why do I imagine her disapproving eyes on me?

"…there are probably a few things you should know. I had a baby with Sean…I can imagine what you think of that. I named her Diana, but it didn't work out so well, because she was stolen by the Grimm and his friends" It hurts to say it out loud, no matter how many times I did "including Sean and the Grimm's mother, who by the way killed you, which I guess you do know. Anyway, now I'm gonna have another baby" here comes the frightening part. You can do it Adalind, remember she's dead, she can't do or say anything "You'll never guess who the father of that one is. It's Nick…the Grimm…The only reason you're not rolling over in your grave is because…you're here" I sigh "you weren't the greatest mother…and I'm sure I wasn't the greatest daughter…but I loved you and now I need you" I add in a shaking voice "You are going to help me stop Juliette from killing me and my baby and then I'm getting Diana back and I'm going to raise both of my children the right way" My throat is soar from fighting the urge to cry "So, thanks mom for being dead when I needed you the most"

Well, it went better that I expected…and it took longer as well

Back to Rosalee's shop, I'm supposed to cut my mother but no matter how hard I try, I can't bring myself to do it and I end up giving up. Monroe doesn't feel like doing it either, luckily Rosalee steps in to take care of this sick task.

I'm a Hexenbiest. One would think I've done much worse. Well, sorry to disappoint you, but I'm not that terrific of a witch…I guess, that's what my mother reproached me too.

Rosalee looks my way. I think I see a flicker of worry in her eyes "You're ok?"

I breathe "It's not that easy being pregnant, cutting up your mom and waiting for someone to kill you" I say honestly and NO, I'm not being overly dramatic

Rosalee laughs at that

"Honey, it's Nick and Hank, we're in the basement" Monroe calls from the front door.

Meanwhile Rosalee and I make a good progress in the preparation of the potion. When the guys join us, we're almost finished.

I've heard about the killing of several young female prostitutes and apparently Nick and Hank have been working on this complicated case. Counting on Monroe's help who explains to us that Nick suspects Jack the Ripper to be behind the murders, which is insane, the guy died about two centuries ago.

"According to the book, Jack might have been around a hell of a lot longer than anybody thought" Nick confirms looking at us.

I'm both shocked by the revelation and surprised to be included in this conversation. Up until now, I never felt like part of their team of super heroes, but right now, I do feel like I belong even if it's only because I'm standing right there and they can't exactly ask me to leave…But still, it feels sort of nice even if I know it won't last.

The horrific smell of the potion makes me dizzy. My head is spinning around all of a sudden. Wait, is the room moving?

"Oh Nick, she's gonna faint" I think I hear Rosalee say

Nick who's right beside me, hooks his hands quickly under my arms and forces me to the bed, ignoring my protests.

"You need to stay here" he orders while covering me with a blanket

"Adalind, I've got this" Rosalee adds

Wow. I might get used to this attention. I know I shouldn't, because these people hate me, but it feels good to be taken care of…Nobody ever cared or worried as much about me. I was used to being alone. Counting on myself only.

Nick only leaves my side when Wu calls him about a new murder. Hank and Nick run to the crime scene, when they're back, the concoction is done and ready.

They all start wondering how to make Juliette drink it

"If she knows Adalind had to do anything with it, she'll never take it"

"Unless she knows it works" I say

Hank winces "How are we going to know that? It only works on Hexenbiest"

"That's why I'm going to take it first. I f it works on me, it will work on her" They all look at me like I have just told them Barack Obama is my father

"You can't" Rosalee states

"Yeah, I don't have a choice. If she stays a Hexenbiest, I'm dead" and here I go. Holly Hexenbabies! It's gross and I'm not the only one who thinks so. They all gasp in horror around me

"How do you feel?" Nick asks me softly

"Like I just drank my mother" Ok, he was just being nice, but hey, there was no other way to describe it.

I go to the bed and ask all of them to hold me down. I kind of have an idea of what's to come. Be prepared, it's not going to look pretty. It takes few painful minutes to suppress the Hexenbiest, but it feels like hell.

When I finally snap to reality, I decide I need to know if it works, even though Nick says I should lie down a little more before testing the results. Although, I'm grateful for him to think about my well being, which comes as a total surprise believe me, I do know he's as eager as me to know if it worked.

I try to woge twice, in vain. Then when I use my powers to move a small bottle of oil, nothing happens.

Wow. That's it

"I guess I'm good" I admit in a shaking voice, not because I'm unhappy or depressed from losing my powers but because I'm overwhelmed. I'm finally free from these chains that kept me from being who I really am all these years. Just Adalind. A young woman, a lawyer and a loving mother. An ordinary person, craving a happy life which she was deprived from because of the powers she held.

"Now all you need is Juliette" I turn to Nick who looks worried

After we get to Bud's house, Nick stays with me until I settle in bed. I decide it's my chance to explain few things to him.

"I didn't know this was going to happen to Juliette" I reiterate

He nods, clearly not wanting to hear it "Get some sleep"

"Nick" I call him when he's on his way to the door, wanting to ask him a question that has been bugging me for a while "When this works for her, what happens to our baby?"

"None is going to take him from you this time" he says with his serious face, devoid of any expression. Lately, often I spot a mix of emotions on his face; Hurt, anger, pain and part of me feels terribly guilty for being one of the reasons behind his sadness.

Later that night, when I went to grab a glass of water from the kitchen, I saw Hank sitting in the living room.

"Hey" I place a cup of coffee in front of him and sit down

"Hey" he answers tiredly "Trouble sleeping?" he asks

I caress my belly absentmindedly "Yeah, I'm having a hard time finding a comfortable position to sleep"

"Maybe you should ask Bud for advice. He's got some experience" we both laugh at that

"I'm sorry, Hank. For what happened few years ago" I say finally. I've been wanting to apologize for a while but never got the chance to do it.

He gives me a sad smile and nods "It's in the past. Wow, I can't believe you are about to have Nick's baby, though"

"I know" I laugh humorlessly

Hank looks at me for few seconds, all humor vanished from his face "Just, don't betray him, Adalind. He's going through a tough time, I don't think he can resist another blow"

I nod "I won't"

%%%

A/N: Hi Hexenreaders, hope you enjoyed this chapter. I'd be glad to read your feedback, so hit the comment section below and let me know what you think :D


	4. Chapter 4

My mom always told me that "Stronger than lover's love, is lover's hate. Incurable in each, the wounds they make" Now that I think about it, I regret not listening to her wise words.

I wake up instantly as I hear the door to my room open, it's dark and I can't make out the identity of the intruder right away, it takes me few seconds to recognize Nick. However, he's got the same mix of emotions I've seen lately on his face. No excitement, no happiness, no relief…just pain and anger.

"What happened with Juliette?" I ask breathlessly, unable to mask my fear anymore

Nick starts towards me and I scoot away in the bed in an attempt to get further from him "She drank it, didn't she?" I don't even recognize my shaking voice. So much for the badass Hexenbiest everybody thought I was.

Juliette is probably back to being normal…almost normal. The Hexenbiest in her is suppressed now and Nick is here to get rid of me. I mean, why would he keep protecting me and our baby?

He got what he needed from me. I'm useless to him now and he finally can kill me. Me, the woman behind all his suffering and torment.

My heart is hammering against my chest. My hand flies to me belly in a protective movement. I don't want to die…I want a second chance in life. Have a family, raise my children along side and be the mother I never had.

"It worked, I saved her and now you are getting rid of me" As he sits on my bed, I switch on the side lamp to see what he's about to do

"Adalind, I'm not gonna hurt you" his voice is all soft and reassuring, but I don't buy it. I mean, let's be honest here, I made his life a living hell. I am a freaking monster in his eyes. The reason why we're even here today is me. The big bad Adalind…Ok, maybe not big, but still bad…at least this is what everybody thinks.

"Why not?" I ask Nick "If she's better, then…"

He cuts me off "It didn't work"

That's impossible. There must be some mistake

"What? It had to. It worked on me, I can't do anything anymore"

He looks me in the eyes "She didn't drink it"

Seriously! Do I have to explain everything?

"No wonder it didn't work. You had to get her to drink it" Duh

"She destroyed it" Nick sighs

Whoa. I'm getting lost here "Why? Isn't this what she wanted?"

"Not anymore" he shakes his head

"I don't understand" not at all

"She likes what she is…She likes the power. She doesn't want to give it up" and for the first time, I notice disgust in his eyes when he speaks of her

Oh…Like Ohhhhh…She likes it. I should have expected that, but it still came as a shock. Saint Juliette craves power as everybody else I guess, but doesn't she care about Nick?

She just threw away years of relationship to keep her powers and…I have just thrown away my powers hoping to have an ordinary life…

"There's another problem" Nick adds getting my attention "There's something wrong with Renard. He keeps dreaming about being shot and when he wakes up, his scars are bleeding"

Oh No, this is not good

"As if the bullets just got into him" I ponder

"Yeah"

"Is he having blackouts?"

"He's been waking up in strange places and he can't remember how he got there" Nick confirms my worries, but I have to be sure it's what I suspect it is

"Did he die?"

"What do you mean?" Nick furrows his brows in thought

"When he was shot at the hospital" I clarify

"I don't know" Nick shifts uncomfortably on the bed "I know they didn't expect him to survive"

Well, it's definitely what I suspect, but it requires great powers to be able to perform such a spell. Bringing back a person to life is not something any Hexenbiest can do and we know damn well how risky it is.

"Was anybody there with him?" although I have an idea of who did this

"His mother" Nick shrugs

Sean's mother is one of the most powerful Hexenbiests I've heard of "Then he did die and she brought him back and someone else from the portal"

Nick doesn't seem to understand what I mean. Well, I don't blame him. Just how crazy is that? Someone dies, he's brought back to life…Shocking, someone tags along…Ten times more shocking. I guess his brain refuses to process that information "What are you talking about?"

"When he died, Sean was dead just long enough for something to siderite and when his mother brought him back, that something came back with him" I sigh "That's why he's bleeding. He is taking control" Nick is stunned "Does he know?"

"Oh, he knows there is something wrong" Nick explains "But, he can't remember anything"

"It's good, because when he does, that would be too late" and believe me I'm choosing my words

"Too late for what?" Hank, who apparently was listening, steps in the room

"Whatever he brought back with him would have taken over…spirit possession" I try to make it as clear as possible

"So how do we get rid of him?" Hank inquires

That's the difficult part "You can't, unless you open the portal"

"How do we do that?" Nick asks

How should I put it? Ok, just say it "You'd have to kill him"

Nick and Hank leave right after I tell them that last piece of information, probably on their way to save Sean's life.

Later that night, as I was trying desperately to find a comfortable position to sleep, I heard a commotion in the living room. As I stepped out of the room, I saw Nick, Hank and that other Grimm who everybody calls Trouble.

No need for a pleonasm here. Grimm is trouble by definition

"Where's Adalind? I need to talk to her" Nick says breathlessly

That's not good "About what?" I ask

"The royals have Diana" he runs to my side

Oh My God. Diana. My baby is with those monsters?

"What? I thought she was with your mother" I yell

Nick swallows "My mother's dead"

No. Nonononon. This is not happening. I never thought I'd feel sorry for a Grimm's death, yet here I am "Kelly's dead?" I gasp

"I'm going to kill whoever did this" He declares and I don't doubt him. He's got that look about him that says he will inflict a long painful death to anybody who was involved in his mother's murder. How can I be sure? I had that same look on my face when Diana was taken from me. As crazy as it sounds, I relate to the Grimm right now

"That would be Kenneth, he took over when the king called Viktor to Vienna and Rispoli, he's in charge of the Verrat" I tell him

"Where would the royals stay?" Hank asks me

"Here in the penthouse of the Hotel Deluxe. Do you think they're still there?"

"Can you get into the penthouse?" Hank wonders and I remember I still have the key. I get quickly ready and join the guys who explain the plan to me.

The first thing I do when I arrive to the penthouse is to check if anybody's there. That must be my lucky day, because it's empty. I go to the master bedroom and put the head of a member of the Verrat that Trouble had beheaded that night, after she caught him hanging around Nick's house, which has been attacked tonight by Kenneth and the Verrat, fortunately the head is covered in plastic. I placed it in the closet and just like that, I screamed until my lungs started burning and my throat refused to emit anymore sound.

As predicted, the hotel staff ran to the room, discovering the horrific scene unfurling before their eyes, called the police and made sure the poor shocked pregnant woman –me in case you didn't guess- was taken care of.

Wu was the first one to arrive. He gave me a nod of acknowledgment and I responded likewise, not wanting to raise suspicions. Nick and Hank were next, escorted by the hotel manager.

"Miss Schade, this is Detective Burkhardt and Griffin" Wu introduced them

"Can you tell us what happenened?" Nick asks all business

I've always been a drama queen so here's my chance to show my talents to the world…not that big of an audience though

"I came back to my room. I've been gone a couple of days and I opened the closet door and there it was" I say in a desperate tone "It was awful" I sigh overdramatically "I'm pregnant you know"

"We're gonna need the names and vehicle information of everyone who's staying in this room" Nick orders the hotel manager. When he's out of sight, Nick shift his attention to me "You're ok?"

I sit on the chair, exhausted by tonight's events "I was almost in labor with all that screaming"

"You did good" he reassures me

"It looks like they haven't packed up yet" Hank comes back to us

"Now what?" I ponder

"Now we find out which vehicles they are driving and pull out arrest warrants for Kenneth and Rispoli" Hank says

Through the head placed in Kenneth's closet, the police can prove he is involved in a murder. From, there they will put on his account the murders of the prostitutes, killed actually by Jack the Ripper and say Kenneth was an imitator. Seeing how it's impossible to explain that Sean Renard, Portland Police Captain, who by the way is safe and sound now, was possessed by a murderer.

Kenneth corresponds perfectly to the description as he shared some features with Sean, such as their height and more importantly, he deserves to rot in hell

I must confess, this plan is genius. It's a fantastic way to get back at him

Wu tells the guys the list of information Nick required is ready on the front desk. Just when they start to follow him, I grab Nick's arm "I'm sorry about your mom. I know how much that hurts" I remove my hand "She died trying to save my daughter" He nods at me and leaves

I do feel sorry for his loss and I can see the pain on his face. Truth is, I haven't seen Nick this unhappy in all the years I've known him and God knows the guy has been through a lot and that guilt I was starting to feel few days earlier intensifies and becomes sympathy.

When I go back to Bud's house, Monroe and Rosalee are waiting there along with Touble and Bud of course. We all gather around the dining table, sharing the same anguish and pain. If anyone told few months ago, I'd be sitting at the same table as theses people, sharing their worries, I would have laughed. Told you life has a great sense of humor

"I can't believe Kelly's dead" Monroe shakes his head

"I feel so bad for Nick" Rosalee looks at Trouble "Were you with him when he found his mother's body?"

"Yeah, but it wasn't a body" Trouble says between bites of food "They put her head in a box for him to find"

Everybody around the table gasps

I think I might throw up

"Nick is going to need us now more than ever" Bud is quick to say

"And Juliette" Trouble nods "Wait, shouldn't she be here?"

"Nick didn't tell you?" Rosalee gasps

Well, if that's not the case. I'm happy to oblige

"There were some side effects to him getting his Grimm back" There. It's done

Trouble gives me a sidelong look "Yeah, I remember but…"

Monroe sighs "Juliette is a Hexenbiest"

"No way" she's in shock

Yes way, darling. A very naughty one

"She torched the trailer and almost killed Monroe" Rosalee informs her

Hey, didn't you forget someone

"And me" I say but nobody seems to care

We hear a car pull out near the house. Monroe runs to the door, followed by Trouble who hides quickly her sword when Monroe sighs in relief "It's Nick and Hank"

Both guys come into the house.

"Juliette is a Hexenbiest" Trouble assaults him immediately

"Yeah and she's with the royals" he seems to accept the idea better that me

Oh my "That bitch has my kid" I yell

"She helped the royals take her" Hank chimes in

Really! What's wrong with her? I might have slept with her man, got pregnant with his baby, but the rest is not my fault, so why doesn't she stop? Ok, I might have done a lot more than that, but I tried to repent and Diana…she's just a kid…she's innocent

My throat is burning when I realize once again that my mistakes put my babies in danger, this is why I want to be a better person…I'm doing it for them

"We're going to need you on this" Hank tells Trouble

"You got it" she answers, putting her sword back in its cover

Nick's phone rings. It's Wu. He puts him on speaker. He gives us the address where the royals are staying. Nick and his friends quickly set a plan, while Rosalee and Bud stay with me in the house.

As soon as the guys leave, she comes to me "How are you feeling?"

"Tired, angry, scared" that about sums up how I feel

Rosalee spends the rest of the night trying to make sure I'm ok, which I'm very grateful for. I never expected such kindness from all these people. By the time Nick and his friends come back, I feel like I can't stay in one place.

Nick has this serious face again. He walks to my side. I'm afraid to say it out loud, although I know it. She's with them…They took her from me, for good this time. This was my last chance. My baby is now with these monsters "You didn't get Diana" I shake my head, tears streaking down my face

"I'm sorry" Nick says

"What about Juliette? Is she there?" Bud asks

"She got away too" Trouble answers, regret in her eyes

"You can go back home now" Nick informs everyone

I swallow "What about me?" my voice is so low, I'm not sure he can hear me "Where am I supposed to go?"

"You stay here with bud, till we wrap all this up" after that he heads to the door, looking both exhausted and tortured.

My heart is aching so much.

Both Nick and I lost someone tonight and in this very moment, I realize I no longer see Nick Burkhardt as the deadly Grimm, but as a man whose mission caused more destruction in his life that in the one of others. At some point, I've come to dissociate Nick Burkhardt from the Grimm, or maybe, I've simply accepted who he is

%%%

A/N: Hi Hexenreaders, hope you enjoyed this last chapter from season 4. I'll try to submit a new one ASAP; I'm really excited to start working on season 5, as it has great Nadalind feels :D Don't forget to let me know what you thought of this chapter. Xx. Shino87


	5. Chapter 5

I barely slept last night with the whirlwind of emotions gargling inside of me. My daughter is with the royal, HexenJuliette helped kidnap her, Nick's mother is dead and he probably blames all this on me.

Bud is really trying his best to make me feel better, but nothing works. I'm aching so much for the loss of my daughter. My kind host places a tray of food on the table, but I really don't feel like eating this morning. I have a migraine; my muscles are hurting and my contractions are more and more painful. The frequency is too fast as well.

"Look, you can't wail on what you hope is going to happen to Diana, I mean Nick really tried" Bud pleads with me

"I know" God. It's really getting painful. I can barely breathe

"And don't forget, you're not just eating for one" he laughs nervously "I mean this is my family's recipe and believe me you haven't lived until you've had…"

I cut him off "Bud"

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to oversell. Just eat…or not, I'll just shut up" He swirls around me like a flying bee

"The baby" I barely manage

He finally notices something is wrong "What about the baby?"

"It feels a little uncomfortable" I shift on my seat. Something is off. One may thing I gained some experience with Diana. Well, Nope

"Errr like…like what?" Bud is nervous and it really doesn't help. He's the one who should keep his composure

"Like he's starting to…" Ouch. That's not nice Baby boy

Bud stumbles on his words, face livid "It's starting to…?"

"Oh my god…oh my god he's coming" I stand abruptly from my chair

"I've got to call Nick" Bud runs to the phone making me cringe

"You're not calling anybody, you're getting me to the hospital" I yell "Get the car…now" Oh God, it hurts so much

The drive to the hospital feels like an eternity. You know, the law of relativity and all that crap. When we finally get there, a nurse gets me on a wheelchair. Bud dials Nick's number to tell him I'm about to have our baby. If speaking didn't hurt as much, I would have told Bud not to bother, Nick won't come. Why would he? With all the shit I put him through aside, he doesn't care for me enough to be here. He will probably come after I deliver the baby to check on him… full stop.

The nurses take me to the delivery room, which looks like a torture room actually. Seriously, what are the handles for? Yeah, that's my second baby, but that's the first time I see a labor room. I had Diana in a cabin in the middle of the woods, with the help of Meisner, remember?

Ouch, forget about the handles, I need something to help stop the pain. Good lord, my skin is being ripped and my whole body is on fire. I have wires in both arms to control my blood pressure and the baby's condition.

"Push" the nurse asks me again and I want to hurt her so badly. For God's sake, I've been pushing for the past 30 minutes. My throat is sore from all the screaming

I'm so scared and lonely right now. Then, out of the blue, Nick enters the delivery room. Speak of unexpected.

"Nick, you're here?" I manage to say and another contraction hits me hard. I grab Nick's arm instinctively. The contact helps me feel less lonely

I can't take it anymore "How much longer" I ask out of breath

"You're doing fine, just take a breath" the doctor tells me. As if I'm not trying to breathe

One of the nurses says something about my baby's heart rate dropping then the machine beside me starts biping.

"It's starting again" I start pushing, but the nurse asks me not to

"What's wrong?" Nick asks

"We lost the baby's heart beat" the doctor says

No, please. Not my baby

They get me on my side, something must have gone wrong "What's happening" I ask Nick

"I don't know" he looks pale

"Something is stressing the baby, we're going to have to do an emergency C-section" with this, they take me to a surgery room. The pain is unbearable. They inject me a transparent fluid and the rest is a blur.

When I wake up again, I'm lying on a bed with Rosalee sitting on a chair beside me. I'm instantly alert "Where's my baby" I ask

"He's fine. The nurse took him for a quick check" she says softly "How do you feel?" she asks

I lie back on the bed "Like I've just fought a battle"

"That bad?" she smiles

"And some more" I laugh "Nick asked you to stay?"

She shakes her head "No. I wanted to stay. Nick would have stayed too, but he had an emergency"

"Thank you, Rosalee…for everything" I say sincerely

She nods

The nurse enters the room with my baby in her arms "Momy's awake" she says as she places him in my arms

"I'll go get some coffee" Rosalee stands, probably wanting to give me some privacy

"Look at you" I tell my baby "Your daddy and I did a great job. You are one handsome little boy" He's indeed adorable. I can't stop staring at him.

"Are you ok?" I hear Nick's voice. He's leaning against the door frame, not sure as to whether he should enter or not

I shift my attention back to my baby "Better now" I smile at my little bundle "I wasn't sure you'd wanna be here" I tell Nick who's now beside my bed. He looks at me like he'd like to be anywhere but here "I don't know, maybe you don't want to be here" I roll my eyes "But at least you are here"

I remember how Sean was never there for me

His face is filled with anger and sorrow and hatred as well which hurts me more than it should "Don't hate me anymore Nick, for our son's sake we can't be like we were"

He blinks and I think I see him break one of these walls he puts between us. He looks at our baby once again. I don't know how to deal with this pain and hurt I see in his eyes

"I don't want to raise him by myself and he is as much of you as he is of me" I plead

He sighs "I don't know if that's good on either side"

"Maybe he won't be like either one of us" I look at my baby some more "I know I can't force you to be there for him" but Nick surprises me by saying he will be.

"Want to hold him?" I ask and guess what; Nick Burkhardt, the badass policeman who puts criminals in jail, the Grimm who gets rid of bad wesen looks scared. I can't help the smile that's creeping my face.

"He won't break" I add, making my best not to laugh at his cute reaction …err…have I just used the word cute referring to Nick?

Definitely hormones

He walks slowly towards me and leans in, looking at me one last time as if to ask permission and I place the baby in his arms. For a second there, he looks actually happy and fascinated.

"I thought of a name for him" I state..

Nick looks surprised he looks between the baby and me "Don't you think we should…"

"Kelly" I cut him off. It might sound sudden but it's not a decision made on the spur of the moment and I did it as much for as for him. Kelly Burkhardt has helped when I was at my lowest and she saved my daughter at the cost of her life and this my way to say thank you.

The other reason is that I want Nick to have a way to cherish his mother's memory. A life for a life.

He stops from swaying the baby. This definitely took him by surprise. He looks at me completely stunned. It takes him few seconds to recover from his shock "Ok" he nods

I gaze at my son in his father's arms and for the first time, this whole situation feels …right

A sigh of contempt escapes my mouth, because the weight of my past mistakes has finally been lifted from my shoulders the moment I set eyes on the one consequence of my acts that I will never regret.

Nick stays in my room until I pass out with Kelly still in my arms. I wake up to one of those nightmares where I relive my daughter's kidnapping, except this time they have Kelly as well. My heart is pounding very fast and I'm sweating "Where's Kelly" I cry. Oh my God, they did it again. They took my baby from me.

"Adalind, It's ok, the nurse took him to the nursery so you could get some sleep" Rosalee is now sitting where Nick was earlier.

"Oh, right. It was just a bad dream" I say lying back against the pillow

Will I ever stop being all paranoid about my babies? I don't think so. My post-traumatic stress is worst at night, this is when I feel most vulnerable and now without my powers to protect my child, I feel even more defenseless

"It's alright, you should go back to sleep" Rosalee smiles kindly at me, but I'm still worried and unsure as to whether I can trust her or anyone else

Nick knocks at the door then gets in "How are you feeling?" he asks out of politeness I suppose

"Ok, I think" I sigh "Kelly's in the nursery" I add hurriedly in case he's here to see him

"I know, I was just there" he states "Thanks for staying but you should go home" he tells Rosalee "Monroe is waiting for you"

"Ok" Rosalee collects her belongings and heads to the door

"I'll walk you out" he informs Rosalee then he looks at me "Be right back"

"Mmmm" is all I can manage. My heart rate is still fast.

The doctor told me earlier I can go home by tomorrow, but I have no idea where 'home' is. I have nowhere to go. I don't think I can go back to Bud's. None of Nick's friends wants to host me and Nick most definitely wouldn't want to have me around, even though we decided to bury the Hatchet…funny how some expressions apply perfectly to my reality.

"Hey" Nicks sits on the chair beside my bed

"Hey" I reply "So, tomorrow I…"

"You are staying with me. I told you I would take care of my son and I will" He states firmly and I release the breath I didn't know I was holding

I think my heart is doing a happy dance right now. Don't worry Heart, we're not homeless…Yet

The next day, Nick picks us up from the hospital very early. He takes care of the hospital paperwork and helps me to the car. I notice he already placed a car seat for the baby which makes me happy, because that means he's accepting this new little guy in his life… maybe my son will have a loving daddy after all. I smile internally

When we make it home, my heart almost skips a beat. In the middle of the living room is a baby bed, toys, clothes, diapers and so many other things.

"Oh My God, You did all this" I ask Rosalee and Monroe. I'm on the verge of crying. Damn hormones

"Not as if you two had the time" Monroe shrugs

Rosalee brings me a bag "And I packed up a few things for the new mom, too"

"So sweet of you" I'm so dumbfounded, my voice is barely audible.

Nobody has ever done such a thing for me. Nick might have lost his mom, but his friends are his family. I feel suddenly envious of such friends. These people are nicer to me than my family has ever been.

Nick shows them Kelly proudly

"Oh he's so cute" Rosalee smiles "Why don't I show you where everything is" then she gives me a tour of the house. It's kind of awkward because it's not the first time I come here, but, it is the first time I'm invited in. I follow Rosalee around the house, but I can't help the memories this place brings back.

"Oh, it's getting late" Rosalee checks her watch "I think it's time we went home" she joins Monroe in the living room and I find myself apprehensive to be alone with Nick.

Monroe laughs nervously "We should let you two…you three get settled in"

"If you need anything, I can be here in ten minutes" Rosalee tells me

"You guys have been really…" more than I ever thought "Thank you" I decide to say instead

An awkward silence reins between Nick and I

"I should probably get some rest before Kelly wakes up, he'll be hungry" I tell Nick as soon as his friends close the door. He nods, but I have no idea where to stay "Where should I…"

He gestures to the stairs "Guest room, upstairs. I'll get Kelly"

As I sit on the guestroom bed, memories of me and Diana here, back when Kelly Burkhardt helped me escape the royals, flood my mind.

When Nick enters the room with Kelly in his arms, I can't help but share this memory with him, after all, I have nobody to talk to "The last time I was here, it was with Diana" I try to ignore the aching feeling " I hope she is fine"

Nick places the baby in his bed "Yeah, me too"

The weird thing is that I believe him. He doesn't look at me with anger or disgust anymore. His gaze is more tolerant, more accepting maybe and it really is more than I wished for.

No matter how much I hate Nick's Hexenbiest of a girlfriend, I try to show him some support by asking about her, it's the least I can do "Have you heard anything about Juliette?"

I'm trying to settle on the bed when he says "She's dead"

Whoa! How, why, when…Oh my god, this is getting crazy

"What? Oh My God" it's official, this whole thing is turning into a melodrama. I'm not sure how I feel about her death. Part of me is relieved, but Nick must be devastated. He's just lost so many people. I don't even know what to say.

"Trouble killed her to save my life" he says sadly

"Oh Nick. I thought she got away with the royals" I manage to say

"No, she never left" Nick shakes his head

"I'm sorry" I say sincerely

Nick shifts his attention back to our baby and I just feel grateful for what he's doing for us, while dealing with this mess which was partly caused by my fault. He simply nods and leaves the room. This load of bad news makes it impossible for me to sleep, so I change into more comfortable clothes and go downstairs.

"What are you doing up?" Nick asks me from the kitchen where he's preparing sandwiches

"Couldn't sleep" I walk to him "Anyway, the doctor said I should walk as much as I can"

"What about Kelly" he asks never meeting my eyes

"He's sleeping fine" thanks god

"I'm making some sandwiches, would you like one?" He asks me

I'm hungry "Yeah, anything"

"Ham and cheese is ok?" he wonders

Definitely "Sounds perfect"

"Lettuce, tomato, mayo?" he asks in a row, which kind of sweet

I sit on the stool in front of him "I'm allergic to tomato"

"That's good to know" he puts a slice of tomato in his mouth

This is all so domestic and awkward but I'm discovering a new face to Nick Burkhardt and I think I might like it. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying I like him, I'm simply liking this new aspect of him…err…Whatever

He places a plate in front of me "So, I'm thinking of selling the house"

"Oh" why is he sharing this information with me?

"Find us some place safer" he puts my sandwich in the plate

"We're going with you?" I probe hesitantly

"Yeah, if you like"

"Sure" I say between bites. That's a hell of a sandwich or is it simply that I'm starving "It's really good" and he smiles briefly at me, God I could get used to more smiles from him and sorry to be repetitive but it's due to hormones.

"Is there anything else you're allergic to?" he cuts his sandwich into two

"Just raw tomatoes. I can eat them cooked" I add while Nick takes a bite of his sandwich "I actually make a pretty good bolognaise"

"I like bolognaise. I actually make a pretty mean…" his phone interrupts our first mundane conversation

"Sorry" he apologizes when he grabs his phone "Hank…Uhu…Yeah what's up" Nick's face goes serious again " at what time?" He turns back to me "Hank needs me to go to the precint"

"We'll be fine" I reassure him

"I'll be right there" he tells Hank

"If you need anything, just call" He informs me on his way out. At that moment, Kelly's cries bring me back to reality. I take my sandwich and go upstairs to check on my baby

Sometime later, Rosalee comes to check on us "Is it an ok time" she asks when I open the door "Yeah, Kelly just ate, I'm trying to get him back to sleep" I say as I invite her in. I'm actually very happy to see her. During the past few weeks, Rosalee has become what I like to consider a friend. Besides, I was getting bored to death.

"Just came by to see if you need anything" she smiles "Nick here?"

"No, he's at work" I walk to the living room "It's a little weird to be back here again"

"Can't even imagine" she agrees

"Don't" I take her to Kelly "Do you want to see him?"

"Sure"

I show her my baby "He really is a handsome guy" she admits to my great pleasure

"He's been pretty good so far" I say proudly

"How about you?" she looks worried

"Oh. I don't know" I hesitate "I'm really happy about him and being a mom again, but…"

"Nick" she asks

"No, Nick has been great and I didn't expect him to be great, which makes it even greater…as long as it lasts" I say sincerely

"He's not going to walk away from this" Rosalee rushes to his defense

I sigh "Not now, but what happens when I turn back. This person doesn't last forever. Sooner or later"

"I know" Rosalee closes her eyes in worry "I've been thinking about the same thing"

My baby starts moving in his carrier, reminding me of what's essential in my life

"I don't want to be a hexenbiest again" I confide in Rosalee who looks stunned "Seriously?"

"I was not very nice" I admit "I can't do that to him…or Nick after what happened to Juliette" Rosalee looks happy to hear this. I guess I'm starting to care for Nick after what's he's done for us, not that I will ever admit it to anyone

"Maybe it won't come back" Rosalee tries to reassure me

"It will come back"

"Maybe not in the same way" she tries again

"I don't want it anyway" I yell "What it does to you is unpredictable" Rosalee looks frightened "I don't mean to scare you off, but you're the only friend that I have"

"I'm not scared at all" she lies

"I just want a normal life, like what you and Monroe have" I smile enviously

"I'd hardly say that what we have is normal" she sighs

I smile at her tenderly "Yeah, but you have each other and that comes before everything else"

"You and Nick have something you both love" she refers to Kelly "that's a really good start"

Right when Rosalee tells me that Trouble disappeared, someone knocks on the door. Two agents of the FBI look for Nick. They ask us few questions about Nick, but we don't say much, when Nick finally gets home I take Kelly upstairs. But, my mind is on a rollercoaster. I can't stop thinking about what those agents might want from Nick. Is he in any danger?

I wait by the window, until I see their car leaves, this is when I head downstairs "Is everything ok?" I ask Nick who's still at the door "Yeah"

"Why was the FBI here?" I demand

"It just had to do with an old case" He lies. How do I know that? I'm a lawyer. I work with liars all the time

"Ok, I don't like this Nick. If something happens to you. I have Kelly, but I have no job, I've nowhere to live, no place to raise him" Nick starts towards me "I mean what if he's like me or what if he's like you or what if he's a weird combination of both of us likes Hexengrimm or a Grimmabiest…I can't do this alone" I yell as Nick puts both his hands on my shoulders to calm me

"We'll be ok"

"I'm soo..sorry" I sigh "I really don't expect anything from you. It's just that I don't want anything to happen to you" ok, now hit pause. What I have just said is completely easy to explain. It's some reaction caused by…Umm, you know like the Stockholm syndrome. I'm sure this is quite similar.

Oh God. I think I have just embarrassed myself. Nick looks out of words

His phone rings, saving me from further embarrassment

"I get to take this" he tells me

"I know" I rush

He takes a moment to steady himself "Hank" I can tell he's as shocked as me

Once he hangs up, he comes my way. We stare at each other, both unable to say a word. Then, he leaves.

That night, I went to bed before Nick came back home and when I thought I heard something, I realized it was actually Nick watching Kelly and me.

We came a long way


	6. Chapter 6

For the past few days my relationship with Nick Burkhardt has evolved somehow. We went from enemies to being the parents of a very sweet little boy who gives us both a reason to live. Nick proved to be very attentive, not only with our baby but with me as well and it's so much more that what I was wishing for.

After he's decided to sell the house everything happened very quickly. We've had few people visit the house with a real estate agent. Although Nick seemed eager to sell his place, he didn't want to leave it to anybody. In the end, it was an adorable septuagenarian couple who bought it.

When they came over to visit the place, Nick called me asking if it was ok for me to show them around until he arrived, because the real estate agent was busy.

"…and this is the guest room" I said when I finally finished the tour of the house. As Kelly was sleeping in there, he woke up to the sound of my voice.

"Oh sorry" I ran to his bed "Momy's here, sweetheart" I lifted him and brought him to my chest while stroking his back.

The lady tilted her head to watch Kelly closer "What a handsome little guy you have here" she smiled "How old is he?"

I grinned proudly "A little over a week"

"Adalind?" Nick's voice came from the stairs

"We're in the guest room" I shouted with Kelly still in my arms

As soon as he walked into the room, Kelly started jumping in my arms and reaching for Nick "Err…I think he wants you to hold him" I told Nick while handing him the baby

His face lightened immediately when he saw his son "Hey, buddy" he smiled at him while Kelly held one of Nick's fingers and for a moment, I completely forgot about our guests.

I really like those moments when Nick looks relaxed and happy with Kelly in his arms

The couple beside us cleared their throats, reminding us of where we were

"Oh, sorry" I blushed "Nick, these are Mr and Mrs Robertson" I introduced the couple

Nick managed to shake their hands with Kelly still in his arms "Glad to meet you. Did you have the chance to visit the house, yet?"

Mr Robertson smiled "Your beautiful wife has been a wonderful guide"

Oh my God

"I'm not …I mean we're not…" just breathe Adalind. What's wrong with me? I've been in way worse situations and my heart wasn't racing like now

Nick looks equally embarrassed; luckily Mrs Robertson comes to our rescue "Honey, parenting couples are not necessarily married, nowadays. Especially when they're this young" she scolds

"Well, that's a shame" he looks Nick straight in the eyes "Let me tell you one thing, son. Marriage might seem frightening at the beginning, but when it's with the right person, every day is a blessing" he reaches for his wife's hand and brings it to his lips

This must have brought back some sad memories to the surface, seeing as Nick asked Juliette, back when she still was normal, to marry him…and she rejected him by the way.

Weird, right? I mean why would you say No if you love the guy? Yeah, well I was never able to understand this woman …Or like her

"Kelly must be hungry" I rush to my baby in an attempt to switch the conversation "It was a pleasure meeting you Mr and Mrs Robertson" I said as I was leaving the room

%%%

Today is the big moving out/Moving in day. There are boxes everywhere; I can barely maneuver between them. The house is practically empty and it feels all kinds of weird to be about to start a new life with a man I despised not a long time ago.

Don't get me wrong, I'm really excited to leave this place. I mean, with all the bad things that happened here, I've had a bad time adjusting, so I'm all for the fresh start. I even got a hair cut for the occasion. It's slightly shorter than it used to be and I traded my curls with straight locks. I like it. It's elegant and it requires less maintenance, which comes in handy as Kelly doesn't give me much time to take care of my appearance.

I want a new start with Nick. I want a chance to start everything over. Who knows? We might become friends or more…err scrap that, forget I ever said it…this is what happens when you live under the same roof as the father of your baby; your mind starts wandering in places it shouldn't go.

I finish packing my stuff, not that I had much to begin with when Nick knocks on my room door

"Come in"

"We're almost done" he states

"So am I, I just need to put Kelly in the car seat"

Nick walks to our baby's bed "I'll get him"

"How long have you lived in the house?" I say as he lifts Kelly to put him in his crib

He looks at me "That's six and a half years" he kneels down to adjust the baby "I never thought I'd be here forever, but …" he looks at me "I didn't know anything about being a grimm when I bought it" he gazes some more at Kelly deep in thought, then turns his attention on me with a shadow of a smile "Now that I think about it, you were my first"

Whoa! I doubt Nick Burkhardt was a virgin when I slept with him…I mean he really seemed experienced, as in very skilled…Holy cow

"Your first what" I finally dare ask

His eyes fly back to Kelly "First woge I ever saw"

Phew. That's reassuring. I don't how I would feel about taking the Grimm's virginity. But wait a minute here, that's interesting, because he was the first Grimm I ever saw as well. The thought brings a smile to my lips

He gets up and brings finally his eyes on me "Remember that. You were coming out of a coffee shop. I was with Hank" Oh yeah I remember. How can I ever forget that day? "You looked at me"

Wait wait wait. This is not exactly how it happened

"As I remember _you_ were looking at me" I correct his apparently failing memory

He's got that amused smile on the face when he gives me a once over and I find it oh so sexy, but let's keep that between us, I'm still dealing with this new vision I have of him. I will schedule an appointment with a shrink as soon as possible.

"You scared the hell out of me" he smirks

Oh come-on, I wasn't that scary as a Hexenbiest. I roll my eyes internally…yeah, it's totally possible to have a mind eye rolling "You scared the hell out of me, too" I should probably tell him the whole story "I guess you were my first as well" I sigh "I'd never seen a Grimm before"

Nick seems happy with my answer, which I really don't get, but I don't have time to over analyze it, because one of the carriers interrupts us to let us know they're done.

Nick takes my bag while me and Kelly head to the car. I want to give him some privacy to say his farewell to the house. He's got so many memories here. Some happy, others not. It has been a hard decision to make and I strongly believe it's the right thing to do…not that he cares what I think, I suppose.

Once we get to our new home, or should I call it former paint factory, I'm kind of surprised. Nick says he picked it because of how safe it is, but really, he could do better…Ok, I'll stop complaining. When we park the car in the garage, I notice a second one in there.

It isn't kid friendly either. I'm not sure I'll be able to ever call it home and mean it. Nick types a code in the interphone by the elevator to allow us access. Once we get into the loft, I must admit the place has potential, but it needs a lot of work.

"It's a little bare, but I got us enough to start" Nick points out while placing Kelly's crib on the kitchen table

I can see how bare it is, what I don't understand is why? "Where's your furniture?" I ask

"It's in a storage" he turns to me "I didn't want anything from the old house. I didn't want the movers to know where we moved. I don't want anybody to know where we are"

Fair enough

"Good. Is that the only access?"

With that, Nick starts showing me around. There's a big room for me and Kelly, but I don't feel safe with the big windows in the room "Aren't we a little exposed?"

Nick runs to the window doors "Not really" he brings them together "Three inches of solid steel" he states happily

"Well, it's not exactly charming but I do feel safer than in the other place" I say honestly

"After everything that happened, I'm not taking any chances with my son" he nods at me "or with you"

Wow. It does feel good to know he doesn't want something to happen to me. Adalind stop reading too much into it. He's just doing this for Kelly. Full stop

"Where will you be?" I wonder, because let's be honest here, I do need him close to feel safe. Back in his house, he would check on Kelly and I twice or more every night which helped me have better sleep…at least until Kelly woke up to eat, but here, being alone makes me shiver.

This place looks like it comes straight from a horror movie

Nick gestures behind me "Right there" I follow his gaze to see a bed that looks very much like those you'd find in asylums, against a wall near the entrance of the house.

Ok. I'm not going to make any comments

"Errr…bathrooms?"

"Only one, in the corner" he replies

"We'll get used to that" I shouldn't complain about anything, with everything he's doing for us, I'm nothing but grateful

Nick gives me a credit card and asks me to use it to get whatever I need and gives me the key to the door as well as the key to Juliette's car. You know, that one I saw earlier and I don't feel really comfortable using anything that belonged to that sick bitch who tried to kill me and my baby and helped kidnap my daughter…Twice. But, I don't say a word to Nick and simply nod

Nick's phone rings, just as he finishes going through all these details "Hank…I know where this is, I can be there in twenty minutes" he turns to me after he hangs up, not really knowing what to say

"If this is the part where I ask you what time you're going to be home, don't worry, I won't" I smile slightly

Nick looks actually relieved to hear this and with that he goes to work.

Home sweet home.

Time flies by pretty quickly as I start placing the few clothes that I have and Kelly's belongings in our bedroom's drawers. By the time I finish, it's already past twelve. I decide to go do some grocery shopping if I don't want us to die of starvation and I need some detergents to clean the place, although I can see it's quite tidy, as well as some other necessities for the house.

As we leave the grocery store, I'm still chatting with my son and don't think I'm crazy, I don't have many people to talk to. Rosalee hasn't shown up the whole day and beside her, I don't have any friends "Kelly, you're too young to appreciate the irony of this" I smirk as we head to the car "but, the car we're driving belongs to a woman who tried to kill me" I roll my eyes "Of course I tried to kill her, too…it was all very complicated"

I open the car back door to place Kelly in the car seat when someone calls my name "Adalind, you remember me?"

I know him…really do, it's just that I can't place his face. Expensive looking suit, briefcase…He's either a client or a former colleague

"Lane from Burman harper" he reminds me

Oh right

"Of course I remember you Lane. How are you?" so this is not exactly a lie. I recognized his face, I simply didn't know where it belonged

"Great. Last I heard, you got snatched up by some richer than god European group" he smiles "What was it? Switzerland?"

I put the bags in the car "Austria"

"Austria right" he turns to Kelly "and who's this little dude?" he smiles tenderly

"This is my son Kelly" I introduce him proudly

"Wow. You're married now" he shrugs, then seeing my embarrassed reaction adds "Or not, whatever. So, who's the lucky dad? Anyone I know?"

Darn. He's really curious

"Nope" and if you did, you'd be shocked

Lane tells me that the former law firm I used to work for is hiring and that they'd be glad to have me back seeing as how they hated losing me.

"If you decide to come back, ask for more money, they will pay it" He adds before leaving

It really feels nice to know I can go back to work. I don't want to be a stay home mom. It might be a little too soon to think about going back to work, but I can't rely on Nick's resources only. I'd feel like a leech. I want to participate in the expenses

When we get back home. I place the groceries in place and clean the house some more. When I finish cooking dinner, it's already dark outside.

"I wonder when your Daddy will come back home" I tell Kelly whose in his crib in front of me while I cook "It's quite late. Do you think he'll make it for dinner?"

I wait for Nick one more hour, before I decide to eat and go to bed. It's been a long day and I can't stand on my feet anymore, but when I settle in bed, I can't close my eyes.

When Nick comes back, I hear him shuffle in the kitchen. I'm glad I left him a plate of lasagna on the kitchen island. Two hours later, I'm still up. I turn in bed, unable to shake the dark ideas that pollute my mind. I think about Diana, about Kelly and it makes me even more anxious. Will I ever feel safe again?

Ok. I really need to find a solution.

I open the bedroom, making Nick immediately alert. Good, he's not sleeping

"Sorry" I whisper as I go down the two steps that separate us "New place. Couldn't sleep" I walk towards Nick's bed "Shouldn't the baby be the one that keeps the parents awake?" I laugh in an attempt to lighten the mood

"Kelly's got a lot less to worry about" Nick stands in his bed

"For now, at least" I say sadly

Nick looks at me expectantly, I guess I'll just have to say it "Nick, I don't want to be alone right now" errr it sounds bad "I know this is…I don't know whatever it is" I feel awkward doing this "But, maybe, just for tonight, you could sleep in our room" it really doesn't sound like I'm propositioning him. I'm doing this mind eye roll again

Nick stares at me blankly, then looks away, making me feel beyond embarrassed. I flush "I'm sorry…this is too weird" I start to leave. I can't believe I've just asked him, Nick the Grimm, to sleep in my bed, because I'm too afraid

"I think we're beyond weird at this point" his deep voice stops me on my tracks

He takes his gun and charger and follows me to my room. As soon as he settles beside me, I feel more serene and safer.

"Thank you" I whisper

And just like that, I drift into sleep

%%%

A/N: Hope you'll enjoy this chapter. Sorry, it took me so long to post a new one. I would really love to read your comments about it so hit the comment section below and let me know what you think of it :D. Xx. Shino87


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N : Thanks for following the story and for your reviews. I'm always happy to read your comments. Xx. Shino87**

Chapter 7 :

I've had the best night sleep in a while. Kelly woke up only twice and Nick helped both times. Unlike me, he hasn't slept much last night. Whenever I opened my eyes, his were still glued to the ceiling. He's got so much in his mind that I guess he hasn't had a single peaceful night in a while.

When I felt him move from the bed this morning, I decided it was time for me to wake up as well. After he quickly checked on Kelly, he headed directly to the bathroom for his morning shower.

"Hey, sweetheart" I stare at my baby who seems completely oblivious to the chaos his parents have been through. He looks so angelic when he's sleeping

Errr…I really have to move my ass. Didn't get up to gaze at my son until he wakes up, I stopped doing it since…last night. I'm not a freak, I'm just a mom who lost a child before, so bite me

I quickly prepare us some coffee and just when I pour it in our mugs, Nick emerges from the bathroom, wearing only a pair of dark blue jeans and Oh My God, isn't he gorge…errr isn't he half naked…yeah, exactly what I was thinking. I've seen the whole package before, so no big deal…really…Crap, stop staring Adalind, he's going to notice, you freak

"Already up?" he starts towards me and I do my best not to look at his bare chest

And I'm really happy to give him the smartest answer I can manage for now "Mmmm"

He puts on a navy blue shirt, a color that in my humble opinion really complements him, but I'm not ready to give him fashion advice. He sits on the bar stool in front of me as I offer him coffee, while I sip mine.

"So, long day in perspective?" I ask

He runs a hand in his hair, which I noticed he does whenever something bothers him "Yeah"

I sigh "It's trouble, right. You're worried about her whereabouts" I provide to show him he can confide in me

He looks at me, unsure of what to say and just when I'm about to give up, he says "They took her and I have no idea what they might be doing to her. There was this wesen, FBI Agent Chavez who seemed to know way more that she's let on. She told me something big is going to happen. Some wesen have decided to arise…the whole world is in danger" he stares at me with a frustrated expression that sends shivers down my spine. What are those wesen plotting against humanity?

I swallow hard "Do you have any clue who and where they are?"

He shakes his head "No, it's like this giant web, with all kinds of wesen and the people Chavez worked for took Trouble for this reason"

"Worked?" why did he use the past tense

He grits his teeth "Chavez was killed few days ago and she gave me this" he shows me a phone and a chess pawn "The pawn belonged to Trouble. Which means she's still alive"

Kelly starts crying, interrupting our conversation "I…"

"It's fine. I've got to go anyway" Nick collects his things and comes to kiss the baby who's in my arms "Bye buddy. Be nice to your mom, ok" he lifts his eyes to look at me and gives me a tight smile, before heading outside.

The load of information he has just given me has me all kinds of worked up. Wesen turned rogue. This is really bad news. We're all in danger and Nick is in the first row of potential targets. I unconsciously hold Kelly closer to me

%%%%

Kelly has been crying all day. I tried everything, from feeding him to changing him and nothing works. He hasn't stopped for a second.

When Nick got home, I was almost crying out of frustration. I gave him a total of 5 minutes to settle down "Nick, check the water" I hiss while swaying Kelly in my arms

"Is the water boiling? If it's boiling you've got to put the rice in it and then turn it down" I instruct him. I'm so disappointed, I really wanted to surprise Nick with a nice dinner…not to impress him or anything…just because I want to help him feel better as much as I can.

"The rice is in" he says while getting the parmesan ready "Why don't I turn the baby down?" he teases with a smile. I must admit, I'm still getting used to this new Nick, who likes to tease and laugh. Sadly, he doesn't do it often

"Ha…how about you try and let me do the rice" I hand him the baby and go check on the food

"Maybe he has colic. How do you know when he has colic?" Nick stares at me expectantly while swaying Kelly in his arms

"I don't know. I'm still learning how to boil rice. Should we call Rosalee?"

"Ok. You take Kelly "

"Aha, never mind I'll call her" I laugh as I dial her number on my cell phone

"Adalind" comes Rosalee's soft voice through the phone as I put her on loud speaker

"We've tried everything but he won't stop crying. How do you know it's colic" I hurry to Nick and the Baby

"Pretty much if he won't stop crying" she says

Great "Ok, so what do we do about it?" I'm helpless and Rosalee always seems to have all the answers. How have I survived without her until now?

"Nothing works all the time" she shrugs apologetically

I approach my son some more to check on him while still in his father's arms "I don't care about all the time, I just care about right now" I plead, but then the baby calms down and starts reaching for the phone "What just happened?" I ask but Nick looks to be as surprised as me "I think he liked the light on the phone"

"Oh the rice is boiling over" Nick looks behind me

"Sorry Rosalee, get to go" I give him the phone and rush to the kitchen

"You like the phone, don't you buddy?" Nick starts displaying the phone before Kelly happily "I think we should get him his own phone" he smiles at me

I sigh "Err…not until second grade" while I finish cooking, Nick keeps Kelly busy until the little guy is exhausted.

"He's deep asleep" Nick comes back to the kitchen, while I'm setting the table "Want some help?"

"Nope. I'm done" I state proudly "Hungry?"

"You have no idea" he laughs as we both sit in front of each other

Nick starts eating and I can't help but wait for his reaction. I haven't cooked in so long. Yesterday's lasagna was already prepared, all I had to do was put it the oven. Besides, I have no idea what he likes or dislikes in terms of food. What if he's not a rice fan? Nahh. He would have told me, wouldn't he? Ok, stop.

"It's good" he says, as if reading my internal babble and I release a breath I didn't know I was holding

"Really?" I can't hide how happy I am "I haven't done much cooking" I admit "My mom wasn't always around so I counted on myself. Eating too much pizza"

Nick smiles "I don't know a kid who would disagree"

I place a fork of rice in my mouth "It is good" I'm surprised it's that yummy "Your mom was a good cook" Kelly Burkhardt used to make great dishes back when she was helping me and Diana escape the royals

"I was about twelve when she sort of disappeared" Nick shrugs

I can totally relate to that "It's kind of like my dad" I eat some more "He took off when I was four" wow I have just shared a very personal thing about myself which I don't do a lot "I know I've said this before, but…" I look him in the eyes "I really appreciate you taking care of us"

"He's my son, too" Nick says as a matter of fact. I'm not surprised by his answer, I know damn well he's not doing it for me, but I'm still grateful and I feel like he's doing way more than he should

"I know, but I don't like to rely on you…not just you, I don't like to rely on anybody" my whole life, it's been just me. This new situation is very foreign for me. I'm not used to being taken care of "You've been great, but…"

Nick stares at me expectantly as I add "I ran into an old colleague into the grocery store" I've been waiting for the right moment to talk to him about that

"From your law firm?"

"Hmmm…he said that they are understaffed, that there's a possibility for a job"

"Isn't it a little soon to go back to work?" all trace of curiosity on his face is replaced by an other emotion, I can't put a name on it. Anger maybe? But why?

"Yeah" I nod "it is, it's just that it made me feel better knowing that there's a job out there…I need to contribute Nick. I don't like feeling so helpless" Nick looks away from me, uncomfortable from what I've just thrown at him "With that being said" ok, here we go again "I'd like you to stay with us in our room, again tonight" he brings back his beautiful green eyes on me and yeah, I said beautiful green eyes, don't you dare say I'm the only one who thinks they are. So don't jump to conclusions, it's just a description "It's just because it makes me feel a lot better knowing that you'll kill whatever walks through that door" I add hurriedly. Please, say yes, I beg internally

Nick doesn't say a word, instead he simply nods. We finish our dinner silently. He cleans the dishes while I feed our son. Once Kelly closes his eyes, I place him delicately in his bed "Good night, sweetheart" I kiss him softly on his small forehead and change quickly into my pajamas before Nick walks in.

I hear a barely there knock on the door, before Nick comes in "Hey" he whispers as he heads to our son's bed "Good night, buddy" he strokes his chubby cheek

I settle under the covers and Nick joins me. He places his gun and charger on the nightstand and lies on his back. I face him "Any new about Trouble or this wesen apocalypse, Chavez told you about?" I haven't stopped worrying since he dropped this bomb this morning

He turns his attention on me "Nope, but we're still looking"

I nod "Good night, Nick"

His eyes scrutinize me some more "Good night, Adalind" he whispers back

%%%

The next day, when I wake up, Nick is already gone. I really wanted to have breakfast with him before he left, but I haven't heard him when he woke up.

Kelly and I are both ready to go out this morning. I want to take him to the park, then buy groceries, I need few things for the house. I'm starting to feel claustrophobic in here

"You know Kelly" I tell my son, while I'm about to put him in his crib "You're not an only child" I want my son to know about Diana, because I have hope that someday we'll be reunited again and my children will be raised together "Her name is Diana, I hope we all can be together someday" I sigh "I haven't seen her in a very long time" Great, now I feel like crying over my daughter for the millionth time

My phone brings me back to the present "Rosalee" I say as I pick up the phone

"Just checking in" her sweet voice replies "How's Kelly?"

"Oh he's good… when he's sleeping" I smile sheepishly

"I've put together few things for you and the little guy" she sing songs "I can come by and drop them off if you're not busy"

I interrupt her "Oh nonono, we should come to you" I'm already getting my bag

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, I'm getting a little fortress fever"

"Ok" she laughs "I'll meet you at the shop"

"Ok, we're on our way" I walk to the elevator

Thirty four minutes later, we're at Rosalee's shop

"Oh, hey you two" she greets us when we get in

"Hi" I smile genuinely at her "It's nice to see you"

She takes Kelly from me "It's nice to see both of you, too"

I notice that the tag on the door says closed. It's nice of her to close for us

"I've made tea, want some" she walks to the back shop area with Kelly still in her arms

"Would love to" I sit at the back shop table and Rosalee comes back with two mugs after she placed Kelly in his crib. He's playing with his favorite animal toy, completely oblivious to us

"Thanks" I mutter as I start sipping from my mug

She sits beside me "So, how are you adjusting to the new house?"

I roll my eyes "It's like being in the middle of the desert" Rosalee laughs "I'm not exaggerating, Rose. It's frigging empty" I sigh "But, I don't hate it. I mean, it's not that bad"

"How about your relationship with Nick?" she wonders

I can't help but smile "He's sweet…err don't ever tell him I said that"

Rosalee laughs even harder "Don't worry, I'm not"

"He's very helpful and nice…and you should see him with Kelly" I sigh happily "He stares at him with those adoring eyes…oh and speaking of eyes, I think Kelly has Nick's eyes" I grin "Look at his beautiful green eyes, definitely Nick's"

"You like him" Rosalee's grin goes from ear to ear

I turn crimson red "What? I don't" I start wiping a nonexistent stain on my shirt "We get along quite well and I'm grateful for his help…and…"

Rosalee puts her hand on mine and I lift my eyes to hers "Adalind, it's ok to like him, he's your baby's father" she says reassuringly

"Ok…ok" I nod in a daze "Then…I guess I do…I mean I like him…just as…you know, as a woman would like her baby's father…errr no, I mean…"

Rosalee seems utterly happy with my confession "I get it, Adalind"

%%%

When Nick gets back home, it's pretty late and he looks both exhausted and frustrated.

"How was work" I ask him after Kelly slept "Wow, that sounds domestic"

He sits on his bed "Work was…"

I cut him off "You don't have to tell me"

He looks at me pissed "He told me to keep Chavez's phone but he hasn't called"

I start towards him "Why tell me to keep the phone, if we're not going to use it" he adds

I sit by his side "Hope Trouble is ok"

He gazes at me "Yeah, me too"

Just then, Kelly starts crying again "Err…there I thought it was quite easy getting him to sleep tonight"

Nick smiles "I'm going to check the water canalization"

"Ok, see you later" I hurry to my baby "Hey, baby boy. You hungry?" I take him in my arms and proceed to feed him, after few minutes he's done "Good boy" as I'm about to put him back to bed, he throws up on me and the little guy looks happy to do it.

I change his outfit for the millionth time today and put him in bed. As I make it to the bathroom, I see Nick on his way there as well "Oh"

"You need the bathroom" he states out of breath

He's completely disheveled "It's ok, I can wait" I say

"No, you go first" he insists

"Are you sure, because you look a little dirty" I point out

He gives me a once over "And you look…wow, did Kelly throw up on you?"

I check my outfit "Sort of" I hurry to the bathroom "I'll be quick" I close the door behind me, but keep talking to Nick "That tunnel must be filthy"

"Yeah" comes in his muffled voice

"Did you find out where it goes?"

"Not exactly" he answers "There was this big door, looks like it hasn't been opened in a hundred years"

Ah, feels so good to be all clean and fresh. Told him I'd be quick…oh no "Ehhhh…I just realized I forgot to bring in clothes to change into"

"Oh yeah! I can get you something, what do you need?"

"Anything without baby puke would be fine" I say honestly

Few seconds later, Nick knocks lightly on the bathroom door "There wasn't much to choose from, so I got you one of my shirts" he hands me said shirt, taking me by surprise

"Thanks" I head back inside and wear it quickly. I know he wants to take a shower as well, so I really don't want to take anymore of his time

"You know, you should really buy some clothes…use the credit card I gave you"

"Ow. I feel a little awkward doing that" I confess

"Well, not having clothes is awkward" he states

I fight a smile "True" I'm finally done "Ok" I head outside feeling weird wearing only Nick's shirt "Thank you…your turn"

I hurry to my room looking for my pajamas "Shoot" I whine when I realize I forgot my bra in the middle of the bathroom. Ok, ok. He probably won't even notice it. I'll go get it as soon as he finishes his shower.

I hop on the bed waiting for Nick to join me. It's become natural for us to sleep in the same bed. I feel the bed dip lightly when he comes back and switches off the light "Good night, Nick"

"Good night, Adalind"

%%%

The next time, I don't see or hear from Nick the whole day. I've stopped myself from calling or texting him more than once. He's never been so late to come home. What if something bad happened to him? I mean he did tell me some Wesen are preparing a sort of apocalypse. Rosalee and Monroe said he's working on a complicated case, but it hasn't calmed my worries.

When he finally comes back, I try hard to hide how relieved I am. Kelly is still in my arms "You look like you could use some help" he walks to us

"Or a third arm" I admit while he takes Kelly "You look more tired than he does" I sigh after I examine his face, something that I find myself doing whenever he comes back home, looking for any sign of fight

"Fun day" he starts towards Kelly's bed

I stare at him some more feeling both pissed that he hasn't thought of calling us to tell us he was fine and scared that something might ever happen to him "I was worried" Not meeting his eyes, I finally say as I stand beside him by Kelly's bed

"About Kelly?" he wonders

I face him "No, you" I whisper "and everything that's happening"

He looks at me for few seconds, then nods and takes me in his arms. As he hugs me, I realize I needed this more that I thought. My heart races in my chest and I feel overwhelmed, but this peaceful moment doesn't last long, as we hear something blast against the outside wall.

%%%

A/N: Don't forget to hit the comment section bellow and let me know what you think of this chapter :D Xx. Shino87


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: Thanks for following the story and for your reviews. Hope you'll like this new chapter.**

Chapter 8:

As soon as Nick leaves the loft to check what's happening, I hurry to the CCTV. Losing my breath as I see the motionless body Nick is carrying to his car. Oh My God. It's Trubel and I'm not even sure she's still alive. Not able to stay behind, I join Nick in the garage.

"It's Trubel" he informs me out of breath. He looks so worked up and worried. Poor guy, he has lost so many people he loves that I don't think he can take one more shock.

"I know. Is she still alive?" I ask worried. Yes, I am worried, because somewhere in the process of being the Grimm's baby's mom, I've started to care for him and his friends. I have no idea how it happened or even why, all I know is that it started slowly but surely.

"I'm taking her to the hospital and lock the doors" he runs to the driver's seat of his car "I'll call you as soon as I know anything"

I sigh angrily because this is definitely not what I want. I want to go with him. To make sure everything's alright. To be there for him, just like he's always here for Kelly and me, but, I guess if my baby and I go with him, we'll only be a burden, seeing how he'll be worried about us.

During moments like these, I wonder if it would have been any different if I still had my Hexenbiest powers. Stop Adalind, I scold myself. You don't want to go back to being a witch.

I go back inside and lock the doors like Nick instructed me to. Kelly is sound asleep, oblivious to the anguish his parents are feeling. I can't stop pacing in the loft, checking obsessively the CCTV. If Trubel found us, who else knows where we are? Where was she all this time? What happened to her? Who did that to her?

I'm still trying to calm down the turmoil inside my head, when I hear vibration. I have no idea where they come from, so I follow the sound, until I find out it's actually the phone Chavez gave to Nick.

Holy cows. Why am I freaked out? It's just a phone. Come on Adalind, don't be a chicken, answer it. Nick has been waiting for this call for ages.

"Hello?"

"Where's Burkhardt" someone says with a foreign accent

I go instantly on protective mode "Who is this?"

"Is she with you?" the familiar male voice asks and somewhat, it reminds me of someone, but I can't put a name on it yet.

"I need to know if she's alive" He asks again. I think he's referring to Trubel, but how can they possibly know each other. I'm not saying anything, though. I'm not risking anybody's life.

"Who is this?" I try again but firmer this time

After a long pause, he finally speaks, sending shivers down my spine "Adalind?"

Oh My God. How could I ever forget this voice as it belongs to someone I cherish "Meisner?"

He doesn't say a word, he simply hangs up and that's all the confirmation I need. Meisner. The man who saved both our lives me and my daughter. He's here. He's still alive and he knows Trubel…Really! this couldn't be more complicated

I call immediately Nick, relating what just happened but not in detail, as he made it clear it wasn't safe to say anything over the phone.

My heart is still on overdrive, when Nick finally makes it home. He drops a bag of what I assume are Trubel's clothes and grabs a beer from the fridge.

"How is she?"

"Just stable" he says

I carry on, although he doesn't seem like he wants to talk "Did you talk to her?"

"Not much, but she knows I brought her in"

I sit on a bar stool "I can't believe she's here. I thought she was dead…is that her motorcycle?" Nick still has his back to me

"Maybe" he finally shifts his attention to me. He looks angry and frustrated "She might have stolen it. She was wearing a body armor, carrying three false ID and a lot of cash" he sighs "This has got to be connected to Chavez"

"How did she know to come here?" I blurt out what was burning my tongue from the moment I saw Trubel here.

"I don't know" he shakes his head "But, when you called me, you said there was more" he walks toward me

I have no idea why I feel suddenly nervous to tell him about Meisner "The guy on the phone recognized my voice" Nick pales "He said my name, I think I recognized his voice"

"Who?" Nick glares

"I'm pretty sure it's Meisner. The guy who brought me to Europe to meet your mother"

Surprise. Surprise. Nick doesn't look happy. And honestly, why wouldn't he? I might have just exposed us to a bigger danger. I bet he regrets his decision to take care of me as well as Kelly. I made it clear we were a package deal, but I'm sure he's wondering why he didn't offer me a shared custody type of deal.

He shakes his head "I'm so sorry this happened…I thought I got us away from all this"

Wait. This is really not what I expected. I thought he was angry with me because I answered the phone and the caller identified me, but him feeling guilty for this is really a surprise. I have no idea what to say to that, except maybe ask him to go back to being the mean Grimm he used to be. Despite all that's happening, I feel threatened by Nick Burkhardt. By his kindness. His sincerity. His protectiveness.

All those things are new to me. I've always been used by those around me, so I learnt quickly to only count on myself. Somewhere along the path, I've started to believe that whenever someone is nice to me they expect something in return.

Then Nick entered my live…Ok, more like I screwed his life, forced him into mine and here we are…but the bottom line is, I'm scared to hell of what getting used to Nick might imply.

His phone rings, finally putting an end to that awkward situation "Wu" he answers

When he finishes the call, my mouth decides to resume working "This is getting complicated"

"It is" he confirms, completely oblivious to the fact that I was talking about my relationship with him

He goes back to the garage, eager to start working on Trubel's bike. Probably expecting to get some answers, while studying it.

That night, he comes to bed really late

"Hey" I turn to face him when he settles beside me "You alright?"

His eyes are glued to the ceiling as per usual "Yeah…No…I don't know" he turns his face and his eyes roam over my face, as if all the answers were there "It's just…I'm tired, Adalind" the pain in his eyes breaks my heart. I know he doesn't mean physical exhaustion. He's tired of all the sadness being a Grimm has brought to his life.

I close my eyes and inhale a deep breath, tears sting in my eyes but I know he can't see them with my eyes shut "I'm so sorry, Nick" I whisper

It takes him so long to answer that I'm not sure he heard me "We both made mistakes. They led us to where we are today, but, I've stopped feeling regret the moment I set eyes on Kelly"

I open my eyes to look at Nick, while he's staring at the ceiling "Good night, Nick"

"Good night, Adalind"

%%%

The next day, Nick disappears right after breakfast. Kelly and I get ready and we leave the house to buy groceries. Just as I get in the car, after we finished shopping, Rosalee calls me.

"Hey, we're on our way" I say

"Great. I've prepared pumpkin pie, do you like it?" she asks

"Mmmm, I haven't had it in ages" I exhale happily

"Great. See you then"

When we finally make it to Rosalee's shop, it's a little after 12. She ushers us in happily and closes the door behind us, placing the closed sign.

"Follow me" she walks to the back shop where she set the table, yeah that same table on which my mom's corpse was cut some time ago.

"It smells divine" I'm so hungry

"Go ahead and eat. I'll feed Kelly" she smiles happily. I know how much she loves taking care of my son.

I start eating and it's really delicious "You should give me some cooking classes. I'm afraid we'll die of food poisoning one of these days"

"Haha. I don't think you need any. Both you and Nick are still alive and healthy, which means your cooking is just fine" she puts some more food in Kelly's mouth "You're one handsome guy, you know that" Kelly actually laughs, as if he could understand what she's saying

I smile at that "You and Monroe would make great parents"

She looks sad "Maybe someday"

I know she's scared, because he's a Blutbad and she's a Fuchsbau. Interracial mingling is a big taboo in the Wesen world. I never got why, though.

"Hey, I'm a Hexembiest and my baby's father is a Grimm, believe me, it can't be worse"

She laughs wholeheartedly at that "Probably not"

I spend some more time with Rosalee then Kelly and I head home. I place the groceries where they should go. Do some laundry, clean the house. Fix something for dinner and by the time I'm finished it's already dark. Nick isn't home yet, but I try to calm my worries. He's a cop and a Grimm. I'd better get used to him being in constant danger…or more precisely, get used to being preoccupied by him.

As I put Kelly in bed, the alarm of the CCTV blasts, indicating a motion near the house. When I look closer, I can't believe my eyes. It's Meisner. But what is he doing here? When he notices the camera, he mouths "Adalind, it's me" or so I think

Seeing him brings back memories to the surface. I remember instantly the last time I saw him right before jumping on a plane with Nick's mother

I open the door and let him in, which is probably going to get Nick on edge, but I don't really care. It's Meisner for God's sake. The man who risked his life for me and Diana. I can never forget the only friend I had, when everybody turned their backs on me.

"I'm glad you're alright" he says when he gets in

My heart does a somersault "You too" I say honestly. I am truly happy he is

We stare at each other some more "I'd tell you as much as I can, but I have to see her" he admits

"Who?" I wonder

"Trubel" when he sees I'm not giving away anything, he adds "I know she's here. I tracked her bike's GPS"

Seeing how I'm not saying a word, he decides to call Nick instead "Trubel is in danger, where did you take her?" he asks when Nick picks up the phone "There isn't time, I know she came to you" I can't hear Nick on the other end of the line, but then, Meisner hands me the phone

"Nick it's me" I say right away

"Adalind, where are you?" his voice is laced with worry and I feel guilty

"At home, it's Meisner. He's here with me" I rush to explain why, because I really don't want Nick to get upset "I didn't know he was coming, but I trust him"

Meisner takes the phone back "Listen, tell me where she is, if you won't you need to go to her. They'll find her"

After that, Nick tells him Trubel has been admitted at St John's. Meisner takes off immediately, leaving me behind. Later on, Nick calls me on his way home to ask me to get his former bed ready for Trubel.

I spend the whole time in front of the CCTV, waiting for any sign of them. As soon as they get in I rush to the elevator door and open it for them.

"The bed is ready" I tell Nick while he's carrying an unconscious Trubel. He puts her on the bed

"Nick I've got so much to tell you" she tries weakly

"Not now" he states firmly

I'm horrified to see all the bruises that cover her face and body "Is she alright?"

"Thanks to your friend" he turns to me

"He was there?" I ask stupefied

He walks slowly to me, his face is grave "Tell me everything you know about Meisner…I need to know who he is"

%%%

A/N: It's me again. Hope you enjoyed this new chapter in the lives of Adalind and Nick. Please, hit the comment section bellow and share your impressions. Xx. Shino87


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N : Here's a new chapter to help us wait one more day, before the 7th episode is finally released. Thanks for following the story and for your reviews. I'm always happy to read them, so keep them coming :)  
**

Chapter 9 :

I proceed to tell Nick how I met Meisner and the major role he's played in me and my daughter's escape from the royals. The whole time, Nick remains silent and immobile, except from the occasional nod to let me know he's listening or so that I carry on with my story. His face is blank, expressionless. I guess I'm speaking to Nick Burkhardt the detective, not the father or the man I've come to care for… no matter how hard it is for me to admit it.

"I trust him, Nick" I insist when I finally finish, earning a glare from him as if he doesn't like what I've just said and it makes me wince. His eyes stay on me so more, then he starts towards the bathroom "I need a shower"

I look at him retreat silently, unsure as to what I should do or say to make this night less frigging awkward. Jeez, why couldn't I be a mind reader instead of a Hexenbiest? It would have been so much more helpful in my relationship with Nick…besides, I always sucked as a Hexenbiest…I'm doing that mind eye rolling again.

Kelly's cries from the bedroom stir me from my mental babbles "Right here, sweetheart" I take my son in my arms as soon as I reach his bed "Owwww, how can a small little guy like you smell this bad, huh? Want to tell me?" I smile at my son while I remove his diaper and clean him with a baby wipe "Come here, you little chipmunk" I start planting kisses on his belly and laughing, when he giggles.

"Need help with Kelly?" Nick asks when he enters the bedroom while drying his hair with a towel.

I like his post-shower look

He rises an eyebrow "Adalind, did you hear me?"

Oh shoot. I don't think telling him "Nope, I was busy drooling" is the right answer, instead I settle for "He laughs harder when it's you who's doing this"

Nick joins me and smiles at Kelly "That's because my stubble tingles him, right buddy?" he bends before his son and as soon as he kisses his belly, Kelly explodes in laughter

"That's cheating"' I cross my arms over my chest

Nick mimics my posture "Breastfeeding is cheating as well"

"No, it's mother nature's decision. Would you have wanted things to be otherwise?" I deadpan

Nick laughs at that "I don't think you'd be as pretty with a beard" as soon as the words leave his mouth, he regrets them. He thinks I'm pretty?

I certainly don't feel pretty. I mean most my clothes are those Rosalee brought me after Kelly's birth and although I'm very thankful, they are way too big and not really the type I would go for, but I'm not complaining, for those past months, my looks were the last thing on my mind.

"Could you forget I ever said that" he says hurriedly

Being the good citizen that I am, I decide it's best to answer honestly "No"

He runs his hand in his hair and winces "Could you at least pretend I never said it?"

"Yes" maybe, I add to myself

"I'll check on Trubel" he literally runs out of the bedroom

I turn instantly to Kelly who was following the conversation "Your father thinks I'm pretty" I'm a good mother. I want my son to understand what his father's words meant. I'm not happy he thinks I'm easy on the eye…I'm ecstatic. Sadly, the only person I can share this information with is a baby who only speaks baby language and I have no idea what "Braglavaraza" means. For all I know, he might be saying "Don't get your hopes up, momy"

I could tweet about it " NickBurkhardt Grimm thinks I'm pretty #busy night"

Errr…Adalind, stop being a drama queen. It's not even that important. He thinks I'm pretty, so what? I think he's hot 9 times out of 10, it doesn't mean I have any interest in him, right? Right?

I put Kelly to bed and go to sleep. I don't even know when Nick comes back to our bedroom. I'm woken up by Kelly's baby babbles. I'm still between asleep and awake. I feel incredibly comfortable and cozy. I try to move, but something prevents me from it. I try again, but I can't budge an inch. I open my eyes and realize Nick has his arm around my waist, his leg on my thigh and he's breathing in my neck…Ok, calm down, it's not the first time one of us wakes up only to realize the other is sprawled all over them, but we do a great job at pretending it never happened. Except today, I really can't move

"Nick" I hiss at him "Nick"

"Shhhhh" he mumbles and snuggles even closer

I try to push him "Nick, I really need to get up"

His body stiffens and that's how I know he's awake. He moves away from me so fast, I'm surprised he didn't fall on the floor…Oh, wait, he's just fallen on the floor

I roll my eyes, as I head to the kitchen to fix a baby bottle of milk for Kelly. Nick walks to the bathroom, still rubbing his back. I guess the fall did hurt…well, serves him right. Did I just stick out my tongue to Nick's back?

Trubel is still sound asleep. She must be exhausted. Poor girl, I can only imagine what she's been through. I wonder if I should fix something for breakfast for her as well. She has quite the appetite, from what I remember.

Nick emerges from the bathroom, ready for work. I hand him a cup of coffee to go and a doughnut

"A doughnut?" he raises an eyebrow

"I bought it yesterday. Isn't it what detectives eat?" I smile tentatively

He shakes his head with a grin "I'll see you later"

The rest of the day is quite uneventful. Kelly and I stay home, in case Trubel wakes up. I'm sure she'll be disoriented and she will probably need reassurance. I've checked on her few times just to make sure she's still alive and breathing. Nick called twice asking about her.

It's dark when Nick comes back home

"Great timing. I've just prepared some macaroni and cheese" I smile happily. I hate it when I eat alone, sadly, Nick comes back late most nights and generally he'd already had dinner "Unless you already ate with the guys" I look away, because I don't want to give away how I feel about that.

He removes his jacket and places it on a chair "Nope. You always seem disappointed when I do, so I've decided to wait until I get home" he sits on his usual chair across from me "I'm starving"

"You won't regret your decision" I say happily as I place a plate in front of him "The pasta is great" or so I hope. I pray internally for it to be good

He smiles when he sees I'm gauging his reaction. He chews very slowly and pretends to be oblivious to my scrutinizing eyes

"Nick" I whine

"What?"

I give him my scariest look, but in vain

"It's good" he finally says with a mischievous smile "I can't believe she's been asleep for almost 24 hours" he looks at Trubel behind his back

I follow his gaze "Yeah, but I'm glad she's fine" I say sincerely

Nick sighs "Me too"

After we finish eating and cleaning, I go check on Kelly who's still sleeping. I change into my pajamas and hop under the covers. Nick joins me some time later, going through his night ritual of putting his gun and charger beside him on the night stand.

"Good night, Nick" I say when he switches off the light

"Good night, Adalind"

%%%

Kelly's cries wake us up few hourd after we fell asleep "I get it" Nick starts to move from the bed and lifts Kelly in his arms.

I try to go back to sleep, but it's too late, I'm so awake that I could run a marathon. I hear Nick talk which means Trubel is awake.

I jump from the bed and head to the living room "We don't have a lot of privacy, here" I say apologetically to Trubel, who looks stunned, which reminds me she must ignore what happened while she was away "Oh, you probably don't even know that I had the baby, do you?...Oh, how could you know, it's not like I had birth announcements" I inform her as I collect a diaper, baby cream and wipes "We named him Kelly after…"

"Nick's mom" Trubel finishes for me

"Yeah" I walk to her "I'm really glad you're ok…I….we're really glad. Nick was a little out of his mind when he couldn't find you"

Trubel looks around her in shock "How long have I been here?"

"Nick brought you home from the hospital, last night"

"Last night" she repeats after me

" You've been asleep for about 24 hours"

She is absolutely mortified "Oh my…what am I wearing" she looks at the grey shirt she has on

I smile "Nick's shirt…he brought your clothes back" I gesture behind me "I washed them" she looks like she has a million questions "I'll take over for Nick so that you guys can talk"

"Hey" I say when I get in the bathroom, where Nick is washing the baby after he removed his diaper "I get it. You should go talk to Trubel"

"I'm almost done" he states

I take the baby slowly from him "Go" I smile at him

His eyes roam over my face for few more seconds "Ok" then he's gone

When I finish with Kelly, I take him to the bedroom, giving Nick and Truble some privacy. They have a lot of catching up to do. Meanwhile, I change into more appropriate clothes, then go back to the kitchen.

"Where's she?" I ask when I notice Trubel is nowhere to be seen

Nick is making a sandwich "Shower"

I join him behind the kitchen counter "Need help?"

"Yeah, I can't find the mustard" he says

"Right here" I hand it to him and start getting more things from the fridge

When Trubel comes back and sits on the bar stool across from us, she wastes no time in eating.

"How did you find me?" Nick asks

"They've been keeping track of you…this is how they found me. They didn't know what you knew or didn't know" she says between bites

"And this is the group you're telling me about?" Nick wonders

"They want people like us on their side, people with abilities" she looks at both of us

"You're working for them" Nick states, all this time I dare not say a word

"When I left here, when I took Josh home, they found me there"

I can't take it anymore, I need to know who are these people "Who are they?"

"HW for Hadrian's wall or something. I…that's what they call themselves. All I know is that they're part of the government…" I'm so stunned I can barely form a word, Nick glances at me worriedly "But a part so secret that most of the government doesn't even know they exist…I guess they don't trust a lot of people in the government, neither…but, they are fighting this underground war"

"Against who?" Nick asks

"Wesen" she looks at us "Nobody knows how many there are or how big a group it is, but it's all over, not just in this country, it's everywhere…like a revolution" a shiver travels down my spine "I had to help…Nick, HW needs Grimms on their side and I'm not the only one fighting for them…I worked with them in Lisbon and I heard about another one in Bangkok"

I really don't like the direction this conversation is taking. I don't want Nick to join HW as well. Kelly needs him here…I need him here. I don't want him to risk his life against a horde of villain Wesen.

"You went to Lisbon" I try to deflect the conversation

"Twice…I never know where I'm going or what I'm supposed to do, until I have to do it…but, there are sections of HW all over the world"

I cross my arms over my chest "Do they pay you for this?"

"Actually, yeah, they do. In cash" she says it like they pay her good money

Nick nods "Do you know Meisner?"

Trubel looks skeptical "Yeah, I do. I told him he was going to have to meet you"

"Already has. He was the one who helped me get out of this hospital"

"Meisner was there" the surprise in her voice is unmistakable

"If he wasn't there you might not be here" Nick seems really worked up "What did they do to Juliette's body ?"

I cringe internally when I hear her name. I guess I haven't forgiven her what she did to me, yet.

She looks away "I don't know" her reaction gets my attention. She's not saying the truth. How do I know? I'm a lawyer remember. I'm good at reading people…when their name is Nick Burkhardt.

She explains that HW took her that night because she was with Nick, despite the fact she wasn't allowed to.

"How long have they been watching Nick?" I can't help but wonder

Trubel tells me it started from the moment some wesen/FBI agent was found dead in Nick's house, but the most surprising part is that they've been watching me too. This little information sends me on alert immediately.

They know I'm not a Hexenbiest anymore, they know I have a baby. She says they don't want my baby, but at this point, I'm not taking any risk.

After that, Nick and Trubel both go check her motorcycle, but it doesn't take long before Nick gets a call from work and leaves.

The next day, he's out very early in the morning. I barely had time to say hi. Trubel spent most her time working on her bike, while I did what I could to keep my mind away from everything Truble told us yesterday and the imminent danger we're all in.

When Kelly is finally asleep, I place my baby phone on my belt and join Trubel with two mugs of coffee.

"How is it going?" I ask as I hand her a cup of hot coffee

"Ok" she breathes

"Look I don't know that much about you and whatever you know about me is probably not that good, so now that we're living together, I thought maybe we should get to know one another a little better" Well, that seemed a hell lot easier, when I rehearsed it in my mind. I do want to know her better, though. She seems trustworthy to me.

Still fixing her bike, Trubel replies "I know you tried to help Juliette. I know you slept with Nick which is I guess, why you're here"

I sit on the floor beside her, not really knowing what to say to that

She turns her attention on me "What do you think about Nick?"

"What do you mean?"

"Are you like…in love with him?" she deadpans

I can't help a nervous laugh "That…no…that would just be too…I mean that would really be too…I…I…well I don't even know what that would be" I sip from my mug, looking away from her

"Because you guys are living together and…sharing the same room" I can see humor dancing in her eyes. I really wonder how she feels about Nick, but I'm not asking her this…not that I care.

"No, that's just because I get scared…we're not sleeping together, we're just sleeping next to each other" only now, do I realize how lame it sounds

Trubel gives me an unconvincing "Uhuh"

"So, I guess you know Meisner" I change the subject of our conversation

"Yeah, I do" she confirms absently

"If it wasn't for him I probably wouldn't be alive…did he tell you anything about me?"

"He didn't, no"

"He was with me when I gave birth to Diana" I smile at the bittersweet memory "Losing her was the worst thing that ever happened to me" I confess. Trubel looks shocked by that "I never got a chance to thank you for trying to get her back"

She swallows "I think she's going to be ok"

I'm grateful for her attempt but she doesn't know the royals like I do

"So, this organization you work for, did they want you to kill Juliette? When you left, I figured you were probably going back to Nick's place. You went back for her, didn't you?"

She looks at me for a brief moment, probably debating whether to tell me the truth or not "Yeah, but Nick doesn't know that"

I shake my head in reassurance "I'm not going to tell him…but you probably should at some point" He needs to know the truth, no matter how bad it is to hear.

Kelly's cries put an end to our conversation

When Nick comes back home, much later that night, he looks like he'd seen a ghost. Little did I, he had actually seen one.

%%%

A/N: Hope you enjoyed reading this chapter. Hit the comment section bellow and let me know what you thought of it :D Xx. Shino87

Muito obrigada por seus comentarios :D


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N : Hey, it's me again. Did you see that episode? Did your heart perform a Hawaiian dance like mine did when Nick and Adalind kissed? I grinned so hard, that my mouth looked like it froze. Enjoy this new chapter. Xx**

Chapter 10 :

Have you ever had one of those nightmares where you keep wishing to wake up, but in vain? Your body becomes numb, your head spins and the temperatures drop very low, then you realize that your eyes are wide open and it's reality, no matter how hard you pinch your arm…Well, this is exactly how I'm feeling right now.

I'm standing in the middle of the loft, on shaking legs and my heart hammering against my chest…Juliette is alive.

How come? Why now? What is going to happen to us?

My brain refuses to absorb this information, but I know what I heard, it was crystal clear. Nick barged in, furious and started yelling at Trubel for hiding this major information to him…to us.

Betrayal…this is what I read in his eyes when he addressed Trubel

She knew Juliette was alive all this time and she never ever mentioned this to us. I mean, I thought I figured what she was hiding from us, but it was only the tip of the iceberg.

"I knew she was alive when Chavez took her, but…I didn't know she was going to survive with what they were going to do to her" Trubel admits desperately

Nick's anger is so palpable, I dare no approach him "and what was that?"

She hesitates a brief moment "Break her"

What is that even supposed to mean?

"What are you talking about?" Nick asks

"Juliette is alive?" I finally manage to say, although I know damn well what the answer is

Trubel explains that Chavez knew Juliette was a Hexenbiest and wanted to use her powers to her advantage, some sort of a human weapon, however Trubel hadn't seen or talked to her since the night HW men took her. She only heard rumors about a Hexenbiest turned into a warrior.

"She just took out 20 Wesen who tried to kill me" Nick sighs. Glancing every now and then at me

I gasp "By herself?"

It is not reassuring at all to know that the woman who tried to kill me and my baby not a long time ago, is that strong. She might have saved Nick tonight, but I remember damn well, she would have finished him up that night, if Trubel wasn't there.

"Yes" Nick confirms

"Where is she now?" I wonder, because honestly, all I'm hearing right now is that my family is in danger and I have no way to protect it or to neutralize HexenJuliette.

Nick turns expectantly to Trubel but she says she has no idea where she could be, seeing how Nick seems to take all his anger on her, I decide to intervene. An idea comes to my mind "Meisner might…If he knew where Trubel was, he probably knows where Juliette is"

Nick hurries to the bedroom in order to get Chavez's phone and contact Meisner

"I want to see Juliette…I don't give a damn, where is she?...I want to talk to her…you should have told me she was alive" He spits vehemently every word that leaves his mouth

So, he wants her back in his life. What did I expect, really? And why does it hurt so much to know that he still wants her, after all she did to him…after all, we've had together?

"What is he saying?" I ask eagerly, ignoring the pain that contracts my chest

"He's saying he needs time" he says softly

"That's it?" Trubel looks doubtful

Nick's eyes turn icy "and that Juliette doesn't exist anymore"

I jump from my seat "What's that supposed to mean?"

Maybe she doesn't remember Nick. Maybe she doesn't have feelings for him anymore…Stop it Adalind, you have no right to wish for such a thing, no matter how much you hate her for what she did to you and no matter how much you're not ready for a life without Nick Burkhardt…If she can make him happy, then so be it. You'll figure something out for you and Kelly.

I would still have those beautiful moments spent together to cherish

"I have no idea" Nick admits after what feels like forever and leaves right after that for work, leaving me with Trubel.

"Adalind" Trubel says the moment Nick is out of sight

I hold my hand up "I need a moment, Trubel" I know I shouldn't expect her to tell me anything, but I need some time alone to process this. I take my son in my arms and cry silently at the beginning, then it turns into sobs and big fat tears…She helped take away my daughter from me and now she's going to kill my baby like she's wanted from the moment she knew I was pregnant and she will get back her life…get back Nick.

Karma is a bitch

I striped her from her life and she's about to do the same to me

When Nick comes back home, I don't join him and Trubel in the kitchen, afraid to see a flicker of hope in his eyes. Afraid of what he might say again about Juliette. I guess I'd better get used to being just me and Kelly, as he will probably want to stay out of our lives very soon.

"You're still awake?" I hear Nick's voice, while I'm staring at my baby in his bed

I turn slightly toward him "It's kind of hard to sleep finding out that the woman who tried to kill me and you and helped the royals steal my daughter, is still alive" I sit on the bed, wanting to put some distance between Nick and me. He's stroking Kelly and I don't know why, I feel angry with him. It's not his fault and I get it, but I'm angry because I'm anticipating what's he's going to say…that now that Juliette is back, we can't be part of his life anymore.

"I'm not going to let her hurt you" he lifts his eyes from Kelly and stares back at me

"You heard Trubel, she's a weapon" I state angrily "And what if she goes after Kelly" I hesitate, then express my other fears "What if she's like the old Juliette and wants you back…I know you feel responsible for what happened with her and that makes you vulnerable and it makes me and our son vulnerable as well"

He comes sit beside me and listens to me until I finish "Juliette being back does not change the way I feel about Kelly…or you" he turns his attention on me and my heart does a backflip, but I'm not entirely convinced. After all, Juliette is the love of his life. Unlike me; she didn't impose herself on him, she was invited to be part of his life and that knowledge has me worried.

"You're sure?" I ask doubtfully. I've never allowed myslef to believe that someone could possibly care for me. Not letting my guard down completely is a protection mechanism I developed, after the many times I was hurt and despite the fact that I trust Nick with my life, I still have a hard time believing he so much as tolerate me.

He nods and says firmly when meeting my eyes again "I'm sure"

A sigh of relief escapes my mouth. We sit like this, next to each other silently for few more minutes, staring at our baby, both wondering how Juliette's return in going to affect our lives.

Nick jumps from bed in the middle of the night, waking me in the process. He looks alert and worried, he runs to check the CCTV and I trail right behind.

"Trubel just left" Nick announces worriedly

I put my hand on my forehead. I think I'm having a headache with all what's happening

"You should go back to sleep" Nick says

I shake my head "No, I'm going to wait with you"

"I have no idea where she's gone or when she'll be back"

I smile "Is that supposed to make me change my mind?"

"I was kind of hoping for it, but I know how stubborn you are" he takes the chair beside me

I put my hand on my chest, faking hurt "I'm not stubborn…I'm determined"

He laughs and I let myself enjoy the rich sound of his laughter

%%%

When you have a baby, you're kind of used to sleepless nights, besides it wasn't like any of us could sleep with all that's happening. Trubel hasn't shown up the whole night.

Nick hands me a cup of coffee, when I emerge from the bedroom after I showered and changed into day clothes.

"Nothing from Trubel?"

He shakes his head "Not yet"

"I can't believe she just leaves like that" I say as I sit on a chair "I know what I'm doing is important and Kelly needs me more than anyone else, but I wish there was something I could do to help you" I seize the opportunity to unveil something I've wanted to confess for a while "And I wish having this baby was our choice…I can't help but wonder if you think it should have been Juliette's child and not mine"

Nick pours himself some coffee and joins me at the kitchen table, taking the chair that's right beside me. He bends toward me, his face serious "I had a chance for a normal life with Juliette…and you gave that to me when you stopped me from being a Grimm"

"That wasn't exactly my intention at the time" I admit shyly

He nods "I know…but still, we had a chance and we didn't take it"

I stare at this handsome, kind and brave man before me and I feel sad for everything I've put him through. He didn't deserve what I did to him "I wish I could take it all back…everything I did to you"

He looks away for a brief moment, then his beautiful green eyes lock with mine again "Except for Kelly"

His admission fills me with happiness "Except for Kelly" I reiterate, because yes, this baby is the only beautiful thing that we got from the bad decisions we've made

We both smile happily, unable to look away from each other's eyes. We managed to find happiness in a total mess. We found a friend in each other, we found support and kindness we didn't suspect was there.

We stopped being enemies and we became a family

I reach for him, allowing myself for the first time to do something I've been fantasizing about for longer that I could admit. I tilt my head and Nick meets me halfway, our lips brush lightly like they want to get acquainted at the beginning, then the kiss becomes stronger and needy.

When we pull away, we're both unsure how to describe what just happened. My heart is still racing in my chest and I'm trying hard not to assault his lips again "That is so not eclectic to do" I smile nervously, afraid of what he's going to say

"I wouldn't say that…It's just a little complicated right now" he admits

I wince "Yeah, I thought about it a lot" and part of me is relieved he hasn't used the word mistake

Those green eyes stare directly at me "Me too…thinking about it is a lot safer"

He thought about it? I'm so happy, I would be jumping and dancing if I wasn't afraid he would think I'm nuts. All this time, I thought he was with me by obligation, but he's been thinking about me as more than just an inconvenience.

I fight a smile "I don't think there's anything safe about us…" yeah, that's me telling you it's worth trying Nick, although there's something that's been bothering for a while "But if anything does…you know… get going, we should make sure it is about us"

I've asked myself this question a million times. What if I'm feeling this only because we're living together and we spend all our time together? What if it's because we have a baby? What if it's because we've been thrown in this together?

Maybe, I'm overprotecting myself, but I'm protecting Nick and Kelly by making sure we really want to be together for the right reasons.

Nick nods, still staring at my lips, like he wants to resume right where we stopped

Trubel interrupts our conversation when she barges in

"Where have you been?" Nick asks her

She's out of breath "I went to see Meisner. You're going to see Juliette, today"

I don't like this, not at all. Nick glances quickly at me, then back at Trubel

"He'll contact you later. It will be a public place" Trubel adds

"Are you sure it's a good idea?" Juliette is dangerous and way stronger than I remember. For all we know, she might want to finish what she started, i.e kill Nick

"I have to do this" Nick states and although I'm not showing how worked up I am, I want to yell at him for wanting to see her again and maybe even slap him to add some drama to the soap opera that's my life

"Yeah, you do" I say instead, realizing I have no right to ask anything from him

Hank calls Nick on his phone, putting our conversation on standby. I cringe when I hear him say Juliette's name. When he finishes the call, Trubel tells him she's staying with me while he's gone and heads to the kitchen, giving us some pseudo privacy.

Our eyes lock again when he jumps in the elevator, but he doesn't say a word

%%%

I've been stressing all day long over Nick's meeting with Juliette. What if love sparks again? We might have kissed this morning, but he didn't make any promise. We're still where we were yesterday…No, I should stop lying to myself. I couldn't stop thinking about that kiss the whole day. Replaying it in my head more than a hundred times and wishing to do it again.

"Hey, can I talk to you?" Trubel walks in the bedroom while I'm putting Kelly in bed

I face her "Sure, have a seat" I invite her to sit beside me on the bed

"Look, Adalind…I'm sorry I didn't tell you anything about Juliette, but…" she starts but I stop her

"You don't owe me any explanation, Trubel" I shake my head

"But I want to" she stares at me with soft eyes "and I think I owe you and explanation…HW is very secretive about what they do. They don't keep me on the loop, especially since there's conflict of interests in this situation…I wasn't sure she was still alive and I didn't want to have you worried or raise Nick's hopes"

I tap her knee "It's fine" I smile at her and she exhales in relief

Just then, we hear the elevator, I jump from the bed and run toward Nick "Did you see Juliette?"

"No" he sighs walking toward us

"What?" Trubel wonders "She was supposed to meet you"

"I met Eve" he says angrily

"Who's Eve?" my nostrils flare. Who's that woman? Why did they send her to meet Nick?

He shakes his head at me "I have no idea"

%%%

 **A/N: Hope you enjoyed reading this new chapter. Hit the comment section bellow and share your thoughts. I'm always really happy to read your reviews. Xx. Shino87**


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: Sorry I haven't posted anything last week as there was nothing from Adalind in "Reptile Dysfunction":( However, if you want me to, I can post Nick's POV during important Nadalind moments, whenever we have a "Nadalindless" episode. Just, let me know about that :)  
**

Chapter 11 :

Life is full of surprises; unfortunately not all of them are good. Most my life, people around me thought I was born with a silver spoon in my mouth. Good looks, money and a brilliant career ahead of me. They had no idea how wrong they were.

Except for my pretty face and that was all genes, nothing was handed to me on a silver platter. I've had to work twice as hard as anybody else, because I thought that if I was a perfect little girl my mom would finally love me and my dad would come back home.

As for money, let's get things straight, except for anything material, it doesn't buy you love, neither happiness. You can have all the wealth of the world and still be miserable.

I know you've heard it a million times before and some of you might even snarl "Nah, she has no idea what she's talking about". Well, let me correct you, I'm telling you this first hand.

"So, Juliette goes by Eve, now?" I ask dumbfounded for the umpteenth time since Nick's encounter with her "Does she have any recollection of her past life?"

Nick's expression is grave, form the look on his face; he's still trying to swallow this new found element "Yes, she remembers everything" he gives me a meaningful glance that sends shivers down my spine "It's like she's become this completely different person…She's cold, authoritarian and …deadly" I know he's trying to be cautious with the adjectives he uses to describe her, but that last word tastes like bile. After that first night they met, he's had to work with her few times. The whole idea of them spending together has ants crawl all over my body.

My first instinct is to look behind my back, to make sure Kelly is still here sleeping in his crib. You think I'm crazy to do so, when obviously nobody came in since Nick was back? Well, we'll see how paranoid you'd be if your child was stolen from you…With the help of this very Hexenbitch, I must add.

Nick notices my reaction and puts immediately his hands on my shoulders, like he does more often than not, to reassure me whenever my mind is on overdrive. It's weird how he's able, now to identify my emotions from a simple look on my face. Well, I guess I'm an open book…err, I don't want him to read all my emotions.

"I won't let anything happen to you or Kelly, you know that, right?" his soft green eyes bore in mine, while his thumbs draw circles on my shoulders.

My eyes drop to his lips and my mind replays our kiss from the other day. We haven't talked about it since then, which means we haven't had the second round of kisses I've been shamelessly fantasizing about. If one kiss has my mind on a rollercoaster, just imagine what some action under the sheets would feel like….

Oh, no. Don't bring up that time I took Juliette's appearance to coax him into sleeping with me, because that day he wasn't kissing and loving Adalind…Nahhh, he believed it was Juliette.

My hatred for this woman cuts even deeper, if that's humanly possible. If I thought I couldn't loathe her more, I was wrong. Because now, there's one more thing I've added to my long list of reasons why I despise this woman: she's got Nick's heart

A feeling, I've become well too acquainted with those past days travels along my body. I cringe as I recognize it: Jealousy

Nick stares at me with an amused expression on his face "Adalind, you heard me?"

My face turns crimson red "Errr…yeah, yeah, sure…I'm going to check on Kelly" I hurry to the bedroom, stumbling on the way…twice

Get a grip of yourself, Adalind. Where's that confident woman you used to be? Vanished with the Hexenbiest in me, I reply to that inner voice

And No, I'm not schizophrenic…just melodramatic

I feel like a teenager with a major crush on the guy next door. I see and talk to him every day, but nothing goes beyond that.

He keeps sending me those mixed signals and I have no idea how to deal with him anymore. He keeps alternating between cold and hot. One moment he stares at me with admiration and fascination and the next one, he's all business again.

I swear to God, this guy is bipolar…A three S bipolar

You are wondering what three S means? Well, that's the description I've come up with for Nick Burkhardt. He's sweet, sexy and smart

In all honesty, I'm freaked out by those new feelings I've developed for him. How can you go from hating someone to …this…I have no idea what to call my feelings for him?

%%%

"What if there's a horde of hungry bees on the other side and they decide to have a sip of your blood?" I cross my arms over my chest

"I will scare them away with my dreamy/grimmy eyes" Nick winks at me

I roll my eyes

He's been bringing this into every conversation since he overheard me telling Kelly he had his father's dreamy/grimmy eyes.

"What if there's Grimm kryptonite in there?"

He hunches his brows "Are you implying I'm a supergrimm?"

I ignore his grin and concentrate instead on the unreliable lamp Nick has picked to make his way in the darkness of that pit we have in the loft. He insists on getting that darn door open and I'm really not comfortable with the idea of his going down there, on his own. What if there's something dangerous hiding there? I've seen enough horror movies, to know it always starts in a dark, secluded place.

"It won't stay on, maybe it's broken" I try to hide my upbeat. No light, no going down, I mutter happily to myself

He tosses some more tools in his messenger bag "Hit it"

Right! The number one solution to all non working devices. TV not working: hit it. Phone bugging: hit it. Lamp not switching: hit it

I'm disgusted to see it works "Maybe you should have a more dependable light source, if you're going down there" I hold it before him

"I've got my phone" he tucks it in his pocket

Note to self: hide any source of light, next time he decides to explore this tunnel again

"What if the door at the end of the tunnel wasn't supposed to be opened?" he starts towards the small door that leads to the tunnel with me tailing him "What if it was locked for a reason?"

He sighs "It's been locked for a hundred years"

"Some very bad things live for a very long time" I say as a matter of fact. Please be scared Nick, please be. Hasn't anybody ever told him about the Bogeyman?

"That's why you're going to lock the door behind me" he's got this conceited smile on and I'm ready to bet my soul he's enjoying terrorizing me way too much.

"Nick" I warn him

His happy scowl is instantly replaced by a serious face "I'm kidding. Look, if we ever have any problems here, I want to make sure we have another way out…this could be it" I know better than to argue with that, if anything, our safety is top priority for him.

"Just be careful" I say, defeated as he slips through the small opening

"I will"

I watch him go down

"What if there's a lot of water on the other side and you drown?" I try one last time

"Not helping" I can feel his amusement in the tone of his voice

When Trubel walks through the door few minutes later, I finally see the light in the end of the tunnel. See what I'm doing here? Genius, I know

Dissuasion plan number 347 (I'm exaggerating the number): inform Nick Trubel is here and she needs to talk to him, now. Thanks universe, for being on my side for once.

"Have you just winked at the ceiling?" Trubel asks me with visible concern, while she carries Kelly in her arms. I can tell she loves this baby more that she wants to let on.

I blink "Err…No?" it comes out as a question rather than a negation

She simply shakes her head and lets it go

I go back to the kitchen table and finish folding my baby's clothes.

"Am I doing this right?" Trubel asks referring to the way she's holding Kelly

I lift my eyes to assess her "Just support his neck" it's quite funny how much she concentrates on the task, when I've seen her all badass while fighting Wesen. Those Grimms, I smile to myself.

"I never held a baby before" she confesses

I smile at her. I've become really fond of her "Well you must be doing alright, because he's not crying"

She looks behind my back, to greet Nick when he finally comes up "Hey"

He's completely disheveled and covered in dust and grease "Looks like you know what you're doing" he says in return

"I have no idea…" she sniffs the baby "I think I've held him long enough" and I barely contain my laughter as I take the baby from her

Trubel joins Nick in the open Kitchen and proceeds to tell him how Meisner wants to meet him and anybody who wants to help. Apparently, there's some dangerous guy who's come to Portland and HW is welcoming just any extra help. The Wesen war has gone viral and new recruits are required.

Trubel leaves right after she delivers the message

Nick heads to the bathroom, before I have the time to discuss it with him

%%%

When Nick gets back from work, the next day, I can tell something is on his mine. He barely talked during dinner and he had this whole preoccupied aura around him. After he helped clean the dishes, he throttles to the bathroom while I sway Kelly in my arms to get him to sleep.

"Is everything ok?" I probe

He sighs "It's this case I'm dealing with. There was a series of murders that have the same pattern to them…it's like the killer follows a sort of a ritual"

"How so?" I place delicately Kelly in his crib

Nick finishes brushing his teeth "Both victims were gored to death"

"Like with a horn?"

"Yeah" he hesitates a moment before adding "Then hung up on crosses"

"This isn't a Folcrey, is it?"

That's really interesting, this whole process is familiar, but I thought they stopped passing this knowledge from generation to generation once the Grimms threatened those bovine lookey likeys Wesens with bringing them to extinction.

Nick is stupefied as he walks towards me "You know about that?"

"When I was a Hexenbiest, freaky rituals were kind of my thing" I admit shyly as I go to the kitchen to fix a baby bottle of milk for when Kelly wakes up in the middle of the night.

"Yeah, I was looking at the books with Monroe and Rosalee, but some of the pages were ripped" Nick joins me in the Kitchen "We know that there's seven sacrifices to form the image of a plaw" he sits across from me, as I'm concentrating on the task at hand "you don't happen to know what a plaw is?"

"Well, Folcrey religion revolved around the stars, the plaw is what they called in England and Ireland"

Nick thinks about it "Resonated like a big dipper"

"Seven stars" I reinforce

"So they need to form a big dipper to form the constellation"

"Yeah, maybe" I try to remember everything I know about this topic "The Aztecs had this ceremony built around Orion's belt called fire drill or whatever they called that…I don't know…anyway, whenever Orion's belt rose above the horizon, they would sacrifice a man on top of the pyramid" I pour milk powder in the hot water and when I lift my eyes again, Nick is observing me with that mix of fascination and admiration…again.

"What?" I ask defensively. Whenever I catch him staring at me this way, it makes me nervous and my heart starts racing.

See? Those are the mixed signals I told you about

"How do you know these things?" he wonders with a shake of his head

I smile proudly "Homeschooling" have I just impressed the Grimm. I mean, I've spent years hiding that my hobby is ancient rituals through history, because I thought it made me dorky and Nick finds this impressive?

I think my heart is dancing the Macarena right now

With that, I run away from Nick's scrutinizing eyes, too afraid for him to notice how much he affects me. He crawls onto bed beside me, smiling awkwardly and I have no idea what to do with that, so I give him a tight smile and wait for him to look away, but he doesn't. He keeps studying my face like I'm a puzzle he's willing to piece together.

"Wow, it's really late. We should sleep" I pat him on the arm, eager to have him look away from me. I think I liked it way better when he used to admire the ceiling, instead.

"Right" He states grinning with his eyes wide open

I sigh "You do realize you have to close your eyes, in order to sleep"

He chuckles "Good night, Adalind" he switches off the lamp

Phew. That was awkward

"Yeah. Have nice dreams and stuff"

%%%

As it turned out, the guy behind the killings was a member of a cult or a recruiting center for the account of black claw. There's this other guy who's convincing more wesen to join the cause. Although Nick seemed relieved to finally resolve the case, he was still worried about that preacher who was still running free in nature.

Nick told me that without my help, they wouldn't have been able to catch the murderer this fast and I tried to ignore the sudden surge of proud his complement provoked inside of me. I think butterflies threw a wild party in my stomach and chest that night.

%%%

A/N: That's it :D Hope you liked it. Hit the comment section bellow and let me know what you think ;) Xx. Shino87


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: Seriously, how could the writers do this to us? Nadalind invite their friends over for dinner and we get nothing out of it. Adalind tells Nick it's her deceased mother's birthday and he doesn't say one single comforting word O_o**

 **Anyway, I thought I'd give you a little surprise hoping to help you feel better. Enjoy :)  
**

Chapter 12 : Map of the Seven Knights

"History is the nightmare from which I am trying to awake"

When I lost my powers, my mother kicked me out within the blink of an eye. You think I'm over-exaggerating things? That's because you don't know Catherine Schade. That night, when the Grimm took my powers, all I wanted was some comfort from the one person I assumed would love me unconditionally, despite my better judgment, but when I ran into her arms, scared and aching, my mom rejected me like I was nothing but a disgusting animal. Her eyes were filled with disappointment, hatred and disgrace.

Everything in me screamed "No, please…don't do this…" but my mouth couldn't produce any sound, because the look in her eyes told me not to even consider trying. I was never going to be good enough for her.

"Your mother hates you and your father abandoned you" those words resonated in my head

I walked away on shaking legs and a bleeding heart.

Yet, I loved my mother. I cried her loss like any daughter would morn her mother and I cherish her memory like she was a good mother, because, inadvertently she showed me the type of mother I'd never want to be.

You are wondering why I'm bringing up my mom, now. I mean we've been through this story before (not in detail though) and I'm sure you don't want to hear me throw a selfpity party. But tomorrow is my mother's birthday and despite the fact she could never win the mother of the year award, we did share some good memories together and I chose to remember only those, after she was killed…By Nick's mom…such a weird destiny I have

Luckily, I don't have too much time alone with my pain and sorrow, no matter how good companions they've been for a long time. Tonight is going to be different from all the previous weekend nights we've had since we moved in the loft. We're finally having people come over. I'm so excited, I can barely contain my eagerness.

"These are perfect" I smile triumphantly as I hold the glasses before Nick who's carrying Kelly in one arm and moving the cart with the other

He flares unhappily "It took you one hour to pick wine glasses"

"I know, right! Took less than expected" I hiss proudly and laugh inwardly as he pouts

"Are we done? That's the last time I'm shopping with you" he's been sulking from the moment I made him read all the ingredients used in the different brands of milk exposed in the grocery store shelves. I forced him to do the same with almost everything we had on the list.

"Relax" I roll my eyes "It's just…it's that I'm happy the gang of superheroes is coming tonight. I want everything to be perfect…besides, we rarely get time to do mundane things with Kelly…actually, we never do anything outside the loft…You're right, I shouldn't have asked you in the first place" I lower my eyes to the floor. He's right, I could have done this on my own. His presence wasn't necessary at all, but I wanted to spend some time with him. Have his undivided attention. Pretend to be normal for few hours only.

Nick sighs, then lifts my chin with his fingers "Hey, I'm sorry, ok?" he says in a soft voice and I try to ignore my racing heart from the mere brush of his fingers "Look at me Adalind" when our eyes lock, I decipher sincerity and regret in his gaze.

"Yeah, it's fine" I manage a tight smile and start moving again but he grabs my arm

"Adalind, wait…I should spend more time with Kelly…and you. I'm sorry"

I'm angry with myself for wanting…no, thriving more than I should. He never promised anything more than protection and here I am fantasizing about a possible romance with Nick. I've tried to suppress those feelings for as long as I could, but he's not helping. Whenever I pull away and go back to just being the mother of his child and his "roommate" baby mama, he brings me back to him. It's like he has no idea what he wants, but I refuse to be played with like this. It's either he wants me or not.

I chew on my lower lip, to contain my anger and his eyes follow the movement, only to remain on my mouth with lust painted in them.

See? Exactly what I said

I grab the cart angrily and head towards the checkout

%%%

I've spent the rest of the evening cooking, while Nick helped get Kelly to sleep, then set the table. I can tell he's very excited about tonight. His…our friends are coming over for the very first time.

"They're here" Nick announces "I'll go get them"

"Ok" I place the fish in a big plate.

Less than two minutes later, Rosalee, Monroe, Hank and Wu walk in the loft, led by Nick of course who looks both anxious and happy. I hurry to welcome them "Soooo, welcome to the Fome" I lift my hand in the air indicating the house "It's a cross between a fortress and a home" I explain.

I remember Nick's face when I first came up with the word, few days ago…priceless. He laughed for a good five minutes, then he kept staring at me for no reason at all…

"I think it's awesome" Monroe laughed

After that, Nick took him to the roof, while Rosalee gave me "a fomewarming gift" in the form of good wine, bread, cheese and other good stuff. Hank and Wu went to see Kelly and I added the finishing touches to our dinner with Rosaleee's help.

"Mmmm…it's really good, Adalind" Rosalee admits, her tone laced with surprise "You're far from the bad cook you pretend to be"

I try to hide how proud her comment makes me. Except for Nick, I've never cooked for anybody but me.

"So I keep telling her" Nick chimes in "But, I can never convince her" he shakes his head with a smug smile

I roll my eyes "You would, if you had dinner more often with me and less with the guys" I gesture to Wu and Hank, who are looking back and forth between Nick and me

"We rarely eat together anymore. I mean, most of the time he says he'll wait until he gets home" Hank defends Nick

"See!" Nick grins and I can't help the smile that's creeping my lips, I don't even realize we're still holding each other's gaze until Monroe clears his throat then gives Nick a look, than I'm pretty sure says ""I told you so""

After everybody leaves, the house is back to being a fortress. It feels already lonely and empty and it's even worse when Nick is at work. Sure, Kelly keeps me busy and he's the main reason I still want to live, but I do need to have real conversations with other people that revolve around something other than diapers, baby colic and diarrhea.

"That was nice" I tell Nick who's helping me clear the dishes

He gives me one of those Nick Burkhardt dazzling smiles "Yeah, we should do this more often"

He reaches for a strand of hair that's falling on my face and tucks it behind my ear "Thank you" I feel a blush staining my cheeks

His fingers twirl a piece of hair "I like your new haircut, looks good" his green eyes bore into mine

I didn't know he noticed…Scratch that, I was sure he didn't. I've had this haircut for over a week and he's mentioning it only now. My heart is dancing a slow with my brain, both swaying with dreamy eyes to Fly me to the moon by Frank Sinatra.

"Adalind…" He starts with a deep voice that resonates in my core and his eyes carry so many emotions. My mouth dries and my throat can't produce any sound. Kelly's cries interrupt our awkward exchange

"Adalind" Nick repeats torn between letting me go or keeping me here forever but Kelly's cries intensify. I swear my baby has the worst timing ever

"I should go check on him" this is exactly what I said, my legs however don't seem to agree, because right now they're still rooted to the floor

Nick tilts his head and moves closer "Yeah, you should" but instead of kissing me, he simply rests his forehead against mine "You're a good mother"

His words bring me back to reality. I jerk away and run to my baby's bedroom without a warning.

%%%

Nick Burkhardt either has a gold fish memory or he's better at pretending than I gave him credit for. It's impressive to see how easy it is for him to act as if we're nothing more than roommates with a good relationship. Maybe I'm the one to read too much into his kindness. Maybe he kissed me out of kindness. Maybe he'll even marry me someday out of kindness. God, I'm losing my mind.

Anyway, our relationship is the last of my worries today.

"Is this one ok?" he asks as he lifts a bottle of juice from a shelve

"Uhhmm" I nod absentmindedly. Today would have been my mom's birthday. I woke up feeling all kinds of pain and anguish. I keep telling myself that it will be over by tomorrow, but I can't help the awful feeling contracting my chest.

"How about this?" Nick wonders again and I don't even stare at what he's showing me as I nod for the umpteenth time since we went shopping. After our last expedition to the grocery store, he's decided to tag along whenever he's home. I can tell he's making efforts and I'm really grateful, but my heart is somewhere else.

I've barely said anything the way back home and it didn't go unnoticed

"Are you ok? You seem kind of quiet tonight" Nick finally states while we're standing in the kitchen, storing the groceries

I hesitate a moment, wondering if it's ok to talk about it to Nick. After all, his mom is my mother's murderer and I'm sure he believes my mom's death was for the best, but I can't help how I feel "Today would have been my mother's birthday"

"Oh" he says simply, concentrating on the task at hand. I guess he doesn't feel comfortable talking about this topic. Our past. Who we used to be.

"It's just hard not to think about it…when you try not to think about it" I hurry to explain "because then, all you do is think about it" Nick doesn't say a word all the time "It's ok" I sigh, pushing away my frustration and showing some bravado "It will be over tomorrow; sorry"

"No, it's ok" Nick is quick to reassure me and I know it's a great effort on his part because I know how much he hated my mother. Yeah, that's just how screwed we are

"Here I'm thinking about my mother who threw me out of the house and I don't even know your birthday…and you don't know mine" I realize dumbfounded. Ok, maybe part of me simply wanted to talk about anything that could keep my mind away from my mom

"April fourteenth" Nick says without blinking

Whoah! I'm pretty sure all my organs are singing Akunamatata

"You know my birthday!" I'm beyond surprised. Pleasure is dripping in the form of droplets on the carpet.

He busies himself with the groceries "Yeah, well…you know" He looks uncomfortable

"I guess, you did arrest me once" That's the most plausible explanation in my opinion. I mean, how else would he know. It's not like he checked because he wanted to know me better. Right!

He ignores my statement as his phone starts ringing "Mine is June eighteenth, just so you know" he smiles before he lifts the phone to his ear "Monroe…from Leipzig…Ok, I'm on my way" He hangs up and turns his attention on me "Monroe's uncle is here. Apparently those books he has are worth checking out"

Nick told me that Monroe's uncle, who's a book dealer has found those really interesting Grimm books that should be of interest for Nick.

"Ok, see you later I guess" I smile at him

"Yeah" he stares at me some more, before heading to the door

When he came back that night, he seemed really worked up. He said Felix, that's his name, asked for ten thousand dollars for the books and he has to gather the money within 24 hours, which is insane. Nick asked HW for help, given that they work for the government and those books are valuable for them as well.

The next day, Nick came back home really late. It took one look on his face to realize something big happened and I was right. Wesen working for black claw assassinated Felix because he wouldn't give them the books. Fortunately, both wesen killers got caught and were killed. The books are in Nick's possession, now. He kept them in Rosalee's shop, though.

Not only did Felix have about twelve very ancient Grimm books, which contained the names of all the Grimms and their linage, but he had weapons and three other Grimm keys.

Nick was talking with so much excitement and animation that part of me was jealous that the whole team got to share this moment with him, but not me and the realization stings.

%%%

 **Bonus chapter:**

Adalind Schade is the epitome of Danger

She is dangerously driven, dangerously determined, dangerously passionate and as much as I hate to admit it, she is dangerously beautiful.

How can someone look so angelic and yet be so lethal? A combination that Adalind Schade, has always embodied with perfection.

How do I feel about her? Well, it's difficult to say at this point in my life

Few years ago, I despised her…no, I used to loathe her. The need to inflict a slow painful death on this witch obsessed me.

We were born as sworn enemies. I'm a Grimm and she's a Hexenbiest. In other terms, she's the wicked witch of the fairytales and I'm the superhero that gets rid of her.

She made my life a living hell, causing nothing but destruction around me. She behaved like her sole purpose in life was to make me miserable and she reached this goal successfully, and the main reason behind my resentment is how her desire to destroy me ended up taking away from me all the people that I loved.

She was so keen on getting her revenge on me for taking her powers from her and for helping in her daughter's kidnapping, that she decided to do exactly the same to me: strip me from my powers and the love of my life; Juliette.

Quite a funny, twisted and sick story to tell, long story short, Adalind took Juliette's appearance, slept with me while I was convinced it was my damn girlfriend with whom I was so deeply and madly in love and the next thing I knew, my powers were gone.

One would think we were even, but that was without counting the repercussions of her actions

I didn't realize how much being a Grimm was important for me until then, but the idea of having a normal life back did seduce me, especially with Juliette not being comfortable with this new obstacle in our relationship. She worried enough about me being a detective, but me being a Grimm as well and having to fight Wesen had her all riled up.

Unfortunately, our friends Rosalee and Monroe's lives were threatened and the only way for me to help them, was to get my powers back and therefore we needed a counter spell. Juliette had to take a potion to take Adalind's appearance and sleep with me. The problem with that is that my girlfriend became a Hexenbiest afterwards…A damn Hexen-fucking-biest.

When I discovered it or more precisely, she showed me what she was, I was in utter shock and disbelief but Juliette took my reaction the wrong way and considered it a rejection for my part.

How the hell did she expect me to react? I needed to process what was happening and I was so in love with her that it took me less than a day to accept the situation and try to figure out a solution, but my girlfriend didn't give me a chance to help her as she moved out of the house without telling me where she was gone.

I was devastated to see the woman I intended to spend the rest of my life with, walk away from me, not only did she leave me, but she made it her personal goal to make me travel through all fifty shades of hell, because she blamed me and my friends for what she's become.

And I, on the other hand, hated Adalind even more for what her Machiavellian plotting caused around me. The more I hurt, the more I hated her.

And then the unthinkable happened

%%%

 **A/N: Hope you liked this short bonus chapter. Tell me if there's any moment you would like to discover from Nick's POV and I'll add it as a bonus chapter, but I'll keep the bonus chapters short because it's Adalind's story, remember :)**


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N:This bonus chapter was requested by HarlowBella. Hope you'll like it**

 **Bonus chapter :** **Nick Sleeps with Adalind/ 22X5**

 **Nick**

Today is going to be a memorable day for my friends Monroe and Rosalee who are finally getting married. I'm really happy for these two. With her being a Fuchsbau and him a Blutbad, they struggled hard to make their relationship work in a Wesen world where interracial couples like theirs are taboo.

Part of me feels envious as well, because I've wanted to take this next step with my girlfriend Juliette for so long, however to my greatest disappointment, she refused my proposal when I first asked her. Her negative response left me frustrated, but I'm not giving up on my intentions to make her my wife someday. She is, I'm sure of it, the love of my life.

After I showed Trubel, a younger Grimm, my aunt Mary's trailer and went through some Grimm stuff she should know about, we headed back home. As soon as we got to my house, I hurried to my room to get ready for the Wedding. My being late would look really bad seeing how I'm Monroe's best man.

Being a Grimm about to step in a room packed with Wesen, is stressful enough. I'll have to keep those sunglasses indoors to prevent them from looking me in the eyes and realizing what I am.

Their deadliest enemy

"Nick, is that you?" Juliette's voice comes from our bathroom as she hears me close the bedroom door behind me.

"Yeah" I remove my jacket and leave it on the bed. I'm actually quite surprised Juliette is still here, I thought she'd already be in the beauty salon. She did mention her appointment was quite early. Well, I guess I misheard her.

"You had me worried, I thought you were going to be late" her muffled voice reaches me once again from the bathroom. Maybe she's getting ready to leave en route to the beauty salon.

I check my watch "Err…Nah, we've got plenty of time"

Just as I turn around, my breath is caught in my lungs. Juliette is leaning against the doorframe with nothing but a tiny piece of fabric supposed to be a negligee. Good lord, my girlfriend looks smoking hot "Well, that's good to know" she states in a sultry voice that goes straight to a very vivid part of my body.

No, not my brain

"Wow" I really can't come up with a better word as my eyes roam over her sexy body

She fidgets with the hem of her lilac nighty "What wow?" her eyes are kind of cold and hard, but my mind is busy assessing her body, rather than her eyes.

I smile "Wow, are you wearing that to the wedding?"

"Unless someone takes it off me first" she takes slow strides in my direction

I really can't keep my eyes off her, or more precisely off her inviting curves "Really!"

"This whole wedding thing has put me in a kind of romantic mood" She presses her body against mine and crushes her lips on mine, before I have the time to process what's happening.

Juliette and I have a healthy sexual life, with what I consider being a good amount of sex, but I can't remember the last we had an afternoon impromptu. Hell, I don't know if we ever had one.

"I support that" I manage to say as soon as we break the kiss, my whole body craving her touches

"You do, do you?" the combination of her unusually hypnotic voice and hard eyes excite me even more. She's being dominant and I love it.

I slip the straps of her gown down her shoulders and she steps out of it as soon as it reaches the floor "I wish our friends were getting married more often"

God. I wish she was this wild more often

It was nothing like our usual love making. It felt almost like a battle, each one of us fighting for control. It was animalistic and rough. We were louder and fiercer. We gave and we took. She scratched the skin on my back with every thrust. She bit my lip with every kiss.

"If I knew you had a wedding fetish, I'd have had us invited to just any wedding in Portland" I state after we finally reach our release. Juliette bites her lower lip to suppress a smile, still out of breath. I snuggle closer to her to collect her in my arms.

"That was great" I whisper in her ear while she has her back pressed to my chest. I start planting kisses on her neck and behind her ear

"Stop" she wiggles in my arms "Stop, Nick" she giggles harder

I support my body on one of my elbows and scrutinize my girlfriend's face "Since when are you ticklish?"

She stiffens and her face pales "I…I'm just overly sensitive after sex" she gives me a tight smile. Her eyes roam over my face and satisfied smile creeps her lips

"What?" I wonder what she's thinking about right now

"We should do this more often" she says in this sexy tone I'm only discovering now

I reach for her ready for round two, but she brushes me off "Nuh uh, cause then we will be late"

"Okay, I'm going" I hop off the bed reluctantly, wanting nothing but to stay under the sheets with my girlfriend.

When I hop out of the bathroom, Juliette is not here, which is not surprising. She must have finally decided to move her sexy ass. Hope she didn't miss her appointment in the beauty salon.

I wear my tux, overly joyful after my afternoon sexcapade with her, when Juliette steps in the room, hair and makeup already done "Wow, you look handsome" she observes

How did she have time to get ready so fast? Regardless of how long getting pumped up would take, I know for a fact that her hairdresser is a good twenty minutes drive away "That was fast" I point out

"What?" she asks as I keep observing her

"Your hair" I shrug. It's styled differently than earlier

"Do you like it?" she turns to face me as I start towards her

"It looks great" although I preferred it before

"Good"

"It looked great, before" I adjust my blazer "Why did you change it?"

"Because we'll go to a wedding and we need to be gone in ten minutes" this Juliette and the Juliette I slept with less than an hour ago look like two different people. Something is really wrong with her today.

"I'm ready, I'll be downstairs" I decide it's just my imagination. She's right, we'd better get going, if we don't want to be late to our best friends' wedding.

%%%

Juliette hasn't said a word during most the drive, she looked cold and upset. The complete opposite of the hot woman I was in bed with in the afternoon.

"What was my negligee doing on the floor?" she asked out of the blue

What sick joke was that?

"I can't believe you would do something like that in our home, in our bed" visible hurt is contorting her beautiful features

"Alright, this isn't funny anymore"

Seeing that she wasn't kidding, I proceeded to mention (no matter how absurd the whole situation was) our afternoon impromptu and the moment those words leave my mouth, her face goes livid. She denies having sex with me, which is insane, I didn't imagine what happened.

"Nick, it wasn't me" if the serious expression she has on her face is any indication, she wasn't messing with me

"If that wasn't you, then who was it?" I concentrate back on the road

I see a flicker of disgust in her face, the moment realization hits her "Adalind. She wanted to come over and she knew I wasn't going to be home…Oh my God…Oh My God…I think I'm going to be sick"

Adalind!

My head starts spinning, a whirlwind of emotions rumbling inside of me. I slept with that witch. She pretended to be my girlfriend and she coaxed me into having sex with her. A sudden urge to throw up makes my stomach churn.

How? Why?

My head feels like it's about to blow up.

None of us speak the rest of the way to the wedding. Both of us probably processing what has just happened. The emotions Juliette is experiencing are palpable; sadness, hurt, anger…

When we step out of the car, I grab her arm to stop her "Juliette, this is so screwed up"

"Yeah, I know" she stares at me with glassy eyes, like I could possibly hurt her on purpose and it only makes me feel worse

"I would never…"

But she cuts me off before I can even finish what I want to say and her next words stab me in the heart "It's just the way it is. What you are now. I don't know if I can take it anymore"

My heart cracks. I try to explain how I wanted to propose to her before my mom came back with Adalind and Diana in tow. I try to tell her how much I love her, but my friend Bud interrupts us, ushering us in.

I can't bring myself to tell Monroe what happened, I don't want to ruin this day for him. Juliette does a great job of ignoring me during the ceremony, but everything falls into pieces when Trubel emerges in the wedding room, face all grave and worried.

The Wesen guests Wogue instantly when they see her, turning the ceremony into a living nightmare and this is when I realize what Adalind motives were.

I'm not a Grimm anymore

%%%

 **A/N: I'll post another bonus chapter about the infamous Nadalind kiss, form Nick's POV, per Ann's request :)**


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N: Dear readers, the bonus chapters are key moments in Nadalind's relationship told from Nick's POV. I understand that some of you don't want to go back in time and would rather concentrate more on the present. This chapter is told in the present, with flashbacks. Hope you'll like it**

 **Per Ann's request, we'll discover Nick's POV on their first actual kiss (Thanks for your sweet review Ann :* Hope you'll like it)**

 **Bonus Chapter :** Nadalind's Kiss…es (I included their first kiss from when Nick took her powers per Katarinaptrv's request)

They say there's a thin line between love and hate. You can swing to the other side at any moment. Your feelings might jump from an extreme to the other in a split second or within few months of dancing around the bush. Mine sure did, although it's too soon for me to give them any label. It just feels like my whole being was shaken and my emotions are all over the place, trying to figure out which way to go.

A transition! This is how I like to put it. I'm transitioning from a phase to another.

It didn't happen overnight, though

And God did I struggle hard against those new feelings I developed. It started slowly, as if my vision commenced to blur. Like I had just washed my face and soap was burning my eyes, I couldn't see as clearly as I used to, then slowly the pain started to fade from my bloodshot eyes and my vision was once again clear, but the women standing before me were not the ones from before.

Wondering why I am using plural? Well, let me clarify then

My feelings shifted drastically for two women. One was invited to be part of my life and the other was forced in it. One was the love of my life and the other was my long time enemy. One was my lover and the other was my persecutor…Then, the roles reversed

One became my torturer and the other my savior

Juliette crushed my heart and Adalind collected the pieces. Juliette threw me in the darkness and Adalind brought me light. Juliette shattered my soul and Adalind fixed it.

Yet, I'm more afraid of Adalind now than I ever was before

Why? Because she has the power to destroy me without her using any supernatural strength and that's the very reason why the idea of letting my guard down and opening up to her completely scares the shit out of me.

Don't get me wrong. I trust her. No matter how crazy that might sound, I'm convinced that she wants me to be safe as much as I need her to be safe. She's not just my baby's mother, no. We're long passed that time. Adalind has become an indivisible part of my life. She's a constant and a permanent. When I look into her eyes, I see a "maybe". I see the possibility of finding happiness again.

"What?" Adalind glances my way as she settles beside me in bed. I know she hates it when I gaze at her for a long time without saying a word, but I can't help it. It's like my eyes have a mind of their own…I guess my eyes like her, a lot.

I smile at her blush staining her cheeks "Just thinking"

She's so tiny that I can't believe how not a long time ago, she managed to turn my life upside down. Her ocean blue eyes bore in mine and I have the urge to jump and let myself drown in this vivid lapis lazuli water.

"About what?" she ponders with concern filled eyes. I like that she worries about me. I like that she's nervous when I'm on a new case. I like that her whole face lights up when I get back from work. I like how her eyes twinkle in delight when I complement her…Because then, I know I'm not the only one affected by her. I'm not alone in this.

But nothing is simple in our lives. We both feel trapped by the chains of our past. We both don't know how to move forward. Is there ever going to be a possibility of a "we"?

"Life…us" my heart beats faster the moment I say those words, because Adalind's eyes drop instantly to my lips. I've wanted to taste her lips again from the moment we broke our kiss, that day after Juliette/Eve's come back.

How could she think for a second that Juliette being back would take me away from my son and her? Didn't she realize what she and Kelly meant to me? I'm the one to blame, I guess. Because I never did a thing to reassure her. It hit me that night when I saw how sad she was after I met Eve. She looked distressed and horrified and being the reason behind that hurt beyond the imaginable. I wanted desperately to take her in my arms and tell her that her and Kelly are my family, now. That no-one will take them away from me. That Kelly made me want to survive, but she made me want to live…but, I was a coward. I simply told her that Juliette being back doesn't change how I feel about her or Kelly.

When you spend so long hating someone, you don't know how to love them. The feelings are right here. I can feel them running in my veins. In my accelerated heartbeat in her presence. In the way my breath catches when she smiles. In the way my whole body stiffens when she uses my chest as her pillow in the middle of the night.

But I have no idea what to do with those emotions. They get stronger the more I resist them. I want her as much as I want my next breath, but our messed up past won't let me act on it.

The day after I met Eve, was the first time I ever lost control over my feelings. She apologized for what she put me through and I was grateful, then she said she'd take everything back if she could and my heart skipped a beat.

Did I want my life to be any different?

Sure, I'd like my mom to be still alive. I'd like for Juliette to be normal…but only to stop the guilt that tortures me every second I spend awake and this is when I realize that:

One, we can't go back in time and change things

Two, except for the two facts I mentioned above, I wouldn't change a thing in my life

"Except for Kelly" I replied to her, not able to admit (even to myself) that I wasn't ready for a life without her either

Her whole face was illuminated by her smile and I couldn't look away anymore. She was so beautiful and I loved how she was an open book. How could I ever consider her a threat when all I needed was to look in her face to guess her every single thought?

Those blue eyes turned darker as she got closer and I jumped in the ocean. I needed that kiss as much as I needed oxygen. I couldn't resist anymore. The moment our lips touched, I felt a surge of electricity run through me. She tasted like I imagined she would. Sweet and delicious, but the moment we broke our kiss, reality caught up with us.

We couldn't just yet, no matter how much I wanted to kiss her over and over again

"What about us?" Adalind's voice brings me back to the present. We're both facing each other in bed. The blanket is covering half our bodies. I reach for a strand of hair and tuck it behind her ear. Honestly, it's just an excuse to touch her. Yeah, I'm that desperate

She closes her eyes and inhales deeply. She seems to savor this moment as much as I do

"Just…We're doing better that I thought we would"

She grins "Yeah, we managed to live together and none of us tried to kill the other yet"

How could her smartmouth ever irritate me? God, I love how she speaks nonsense and I'm the only one to understand what she means. Or when she picks the worst moment to throw a sarcastic comment, or how she invents the craziest stories when she doesn't want me to go to a dangerous place.

"We even managed to kiss without you biting me so hard so my lip would bleed" I refer to both our kisses, because yeah, we had a kiss before that one and I'm not sure we can call it a first kiss.

It was back when she was a very mean Hexenbiest adamant to make me regret being born. I discovered that for me to take her powers from her, she must have my blood in her system. I had no idea how I could do that. After we fought in the middle of the woods for long minutes I finally managed to pin her under me, with my weight on her knees and my arms restraining her hands, she couldn't move. My heart was beating very fast as I thought about my next move. I thought of Juliette's reaction if she knew. Was it cheating? That wasn't even going to be a real kiss. It was probably going to end faster than it started, I thought to myself as I gathered my courage and crashed my lips against hers, expecting to feel a rush of disgust or nausea.

Hey, I had never kissed a Hexenbiest before, so I was far from imagining it would be a regular kiss. Her lips were softer that I thought and our lips molded easily together. They fit so well that it felt almost pleasant, if I didn't hate her so much at the time…and of course I had a girlfriend I was madly in love with, with that reminder, I pressed my lips against hers with more force than needed. Adalind struggled but I wouldn't let go, out of frustration, she responded with a fierce bite that she instantly regretted when the taste of blood made its way in her mouth.

I will never forget the distress I saw in her eyes when she lost her powers. I never told anyone, but I felt a pang in the heart when I saw the tears streaking down her face.

As I look at the woman lying beside me. The woman who gave up willingly on her powers to help save Juliette's life. A woman who loves her children more than her own life. A woman who gives love more than she receives. I realize that Adalind Schade is not different from before, she's just finally herself.

I scoot closer and gather her in my arms "Good night, Adalind" I say as I press a kiss on her forehead


	15. Chapter 15

**A/N : Where should I start ? You know what, I'm not going to say a word about that episode. I'm still overwhelmed. It's all in this chapter. Hope you'll like it**

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Chapter 15 :

 _« It is not down on any maps, true places never are »_

Have you ever wondered why love is associated to the heart when we know that its sole purpose is to pump blood? Why do we persist on believing that it's our cardiac organ that's responsible for our emotions when we feel them everywhere in our body? Why we refer to love disappointment as heartbreak when you're perfectly aware that it's your whole body that feels broken?

Am I wrong to say that when we love, we love with our heart that beats faster, with our lungs that breathe heavier, with our stomach that flutters more times than not, with our legs that shake in the presence of our love interest, with our brain that thinks every flaw makes him even more perfect.

Love. Such a small word. Four simple letters, yet they have the power to crush your world faster than you can imagine. I can feel the letters on the tip of my tongue, fighting their way out, pushing against the walls of restraint and every day, I lose some ground in this perpetual war.

See, there are millions ways to be heartbroken. Like right now, while I'm standing before a map and ancient keys, listening to Nick's explanation on why he must put himself in danger to find out what his ancestors wanted him to look for in the first place, by leaving clues behind them.

"There are seven keys forged by the seven knights who fought for the seven royal families on the fourth crusades, when you put the maps together they make one big map leading to the location where the knights hid the precious wealth they took from Constantinople after they burnt it…those knights are my ancestors…We finally found where those maps lead Adalind…I need to go"

I try to suppress the tears that threaten to pool my eyes. All I can hear now, is that he's willing to leave Kelly and I behind while he goes in the pursuit of some treasure, a quest that will most likely cost him his life and my sanity "These keys lead to nothing but death, you and I both know that…there are a lot of powerful people who would do anything to get their hands on these"

Nick walks to me "Adalind…" he starts but I don't want to hear it, I'm done listening to this nonsense "It's not worth it" I yell out of patience. Doesn't he get it? Doesn't he understand that losing him is more than I can take? "This is a fantasy someone had eight hundred years ago" but Nick won't listen to my pleading heart. His determination doesn't waver to my begging eyes

"This might be a waste of my time, but I have to go" the next thing he says makes me cringe at the memory "My aunt gave me one of these keys, she believed in it"

"And it almost cost her, her life" I point out, remembering distinctively how I almost killed her. God, I can't believe the awful things I did back then

"And I owe it to her" the way he looks at me tells me not to argue with that. I've already lost this battle a long time ago, when I tried to kill his aunt

I give him a sigh of resignation "and I owe it to her, too" and just like that my heart cracks a little bit more, because I can see it in his eyes that no matter what I say, he won't back down. His decision was already made when he came home. He only informed me and honestly, what did I expect? For him to ask for my opinion, like he cares what I think?

Wishful thinking, right

Well, just because you love somebody doesn't mean they love you back…Oh, you heard me right. I've just admitted my feelings for him, but don't act so surprised, I know you guessed it a long time ago. I'm terrible at hiding my emotions, anyway

"Monroe is going with me, Rosalee will be here with you and Kelly" is that supposed to make me feel relieved? Because, no it doesn't. I feel like throwing something at Nick and crying in his arms all at once. I hate him for putting me through this

"When are you leaving?"

And there comes the last blow that shatters my heart into pieces "Tomorrow" suddenly, it feels too painful to breathe. I can't look into those green eyes anymore, I need space. I need to be away from him, right now, because I can't keep my cool for much longer. I head to the bedroom, leaving him behind but he catches up with me in a second with his fast strides.

"Look, I know you are worried" I can feel the heat radiating from his body right behind me, but I can't look at him, yet. I need to pull myself together first

"Yeah, I am" I barely recognize my voice as I admit that

"You're probably right, it's probably nothing" I know he's trying to reassure me and I'm grateful for that, but now is not the moment to fool each other.

"What if I'm wrong" I spin around to face him "What if what they buried is something evil, something they never wanted found and for good reason" Please, listen to me Nick

He brushes it off "Well, they wouldn't have made a map then, they would have just destroyed it"

"What if it couldn't be destroyed?" I counter, ever the optimistic Adalind

He takes a step toward me, his gentle eyes feeling like a caress over my face "Then, they would have just buried it"

And it finally drowns in. Acceptance

No matter what I do or say, Nick is going anyway and I have to respect his choice

"I know I can't keep you from going and it's something you have to do" I take a deep breath and say those words I dread most "and I also know there's a chance you won't come back" as the words form in my lips, my whole body shivers with the terror that the mere thought of his death causes

"Adalind" Nick closes the gap between us in one step. His voice is strained, like he can actually feel the pain he's causing and it hurts him just as much as it hurts me

But, now that I finally gathered the courage to say what I've been keeping for so long in the confines of my heart, I can't have him interrupt me "I can't let you go without you knowing how I feel about you" I see a flicker of surprise in those beautiful green eyes I fell in love with before I could even realize it. I can see the reflection of my own lust and anticipation in them and it fuels me even more as I brush my lips gently against his. I missed the softness of his mouth and the taste of him. Although brief, this kiss held much more emotions than any word we could possibly say. As I pull away and unbutton his shirt, I let those three words free and the moment I open my mouth they fly like three beautiful birds eager for freedom "And I don't care if this is a mistake" I lock my eyes with his "I love you"

I'm freed from the chains of restraint and it feels like an explosion within my chest.

He gazes at me with so much concentration, like he doesn't want to miss a nanosecond of what I say or do and it's enough to undo me. I don't expect him to say anything in return. But there's a difference between "expectations" and "wants" and I'd be a hypocrite to pretend I don't want to hear him say them back, but it's not what tonight is all about.

Nick Burkhardt offered me so much more that I could wish for. He's showed me kindness and honesty. He gave me protection and care. He pieced together the remnants of my broken soul (and yes, I do have a soul)

He mended my heart

When I look at my reflection in his eyes, I see a beautiful woman inside out. Someone, I've been looking for in every mirror I stared at, little did I know I'd find it in the pupil of what I believed to be my sworn enemy.

I bring back my mouth to his and this time there's desperation and need in the way our lips dance together. I want to feel him, all of him. Skin against skin. Flesh against flesh. We get rid of those clothes that come between us like obstacles and Nick pushes me against the bed, showing me just how much he wants me. Proving me that he craves me as much as I crave him. It's so different from when I had sex with him as Juliette. I don't know if it's due to the fact that this time we're both ourselves and consenting, or it's enhanced because of my feelings for him, but it's not just sex. It's love making. I can feel it in every touch, every caress, every word he whispers in my ear.

And I see it in the way he's gauging every move, every sound I make. His eyes asking for permission with every stroke. His stare roaming over my body, scaning every inch, every parcel of skin and God, I feel so beautiful right now, under his warm gaze.

I'm grateful it's too dark for him to see the tear that falls down my cheek when it's over, because this is Goodbye. I refuse to let myself think of it as a farewell, but the possibility is too big for me to ignore. This might be the last time I ever see him.

No, heart is not the only organ that loves because it's not the only one that hurts when love becomes painful.

An image of all those people who have to say goodbye to a lover, a sibling, a friend who's in the army, wondering if they'll ever see them again, makes its way in my head.

It's like someone keeps your head under water, while you are struggling to breathe. Your lungs ache, your head spins and your eyes burn. I'm drowning in pain. Tentacles of fear retaining my body in the bottom of the sea.

I don't remember when sleep took over my anguish, but when I wake up, I'm relieved to see that Nick is still in bed, holding me tightly against his chest, while his thumb draws circles on my shoulder. I don't want this moment to ever end. It feels so right. As if my whole existence was meant to lead to this very moment. Me, Nick and Kelly.

Nick's eyes are glued to the ceiling, something I haven't seen him do much lately and which I know now, he does whenever he's deep in thought. Part of me is scared he might be regretting last night, but the possibility is quickly discarded as he stares affectionately at me.

"Are you ok?" I ponder

He gives me one of those trademark Grimm smiles, I like to believe he keeps only for me "Yeah"

I can't hide how happy I am "Really"

Just asking for confirmation. We all do it. It's engraved in our system. (You look pretty, today. Really! Let's go on a date. Really! I brought you something. Really!)

"Are you?" He holds me in place with his hand still attached to my shoulder

I think about his question in amazement, barely able to hide my tremendous grin "If anyone had said what we did last night was even a possibility given how we met…"

"Yeah, I wouldn't believe them either" he is stroking my arm so gently, so softly that I never want to move from here again.

I sigh, thinking about the real world that's blowing up the small bubble we created for ourselves last night "Everything in our lives is so complicated…Last night, that all kind of went away, at least for a little while"

Speaking of real world, Trubel rings Nick, interrupting our conversation. I tune out as soon as he picks up the phone and snuggle against him, in an attempt to savor this moment a little longer.

"Trubel is on her way" Nick groans as he sets his phone on the nightstand

"I knew we couldn't snuggle forever" I joke and start to move, but Nick brings me back to him and kisses me fiercely until we are both gasping for air "I'll make up for it when I'm back" he whispers against my lips and a choir of organs starts chanting "Hallelujah" inside my body.

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"His name is Maruan Henana" Trubel places on the table a picture of a man with dark hair and a tanned complexion "He works for black claw. We don't know much about him, but he's connected to a bombing in London, Iran, Kiev…He arrived few days ago to Portland"

I can feel my heart hammering against my chest. I don't like HW involving Nick in their operations "Why is he here?" I ask drily

"We don't know. We haven't been able to find him" she looks at both of us "This guy stays under the radar. Meisner thinks he might be here on assignment. Just wanted to let you know"

Nick's phone puts the conversation on hold. It's Rosalee. The blood drains off my face the moment I hear him say "I'll be there at five"

He takes the file Trubel has just handed him and heads to work, completely oblivious to my shaking legs and burning lungs. That's it. He's flying to Stuttgart tonight. Running in the open arms of danger.

When he's back home later that day, he heads directly to the bathroom for a quick shower then gets his bag ready. We hardly say a word to each other, our anguish visible on our faces. As I watch his beautiful face contorted with pain, I know he's leaving out of obligation, but he doesn't feel an ounce of excitement about letting us behind.

"You take care of mommy when I'm gone" He tells Kelly before he bends down to place a delicate kiss on our son's cheek. I instruct myself to breathe evenly

Inhale/ Exhale

Inhale/ Exhale

I lie against the door frame, my legs unable to hold my weight anymore. I can feel the tears burning in the corners of my eyes. I force a smile on my face when Nick faces me "You'd better come back"

Nick smiles sadly "I will"

My lower lip trembles, indicating that it won't be long before I lose my composure "Cause I don't want to have to explain to him why you didn't"

With that, Nick puts his bag on the floor and takes me in a tight hug, allowing me one last time to feel our hearts beating against each other in synchrony. I lay my head against his chest and listen to his hammering heart. His heartbeats sound like a lullaby. It's like music to my ears.

As we pull away, he manages a smile that doesn't reach his sad eyes and heads toward the door. When I spin around to watch him leave, it takes everything within me not to run after him and beg for him to stay.

The moment he disappears in the elevator, my legs give up letting me drop to my knees and cry like never before. What started like soft cries give place to sobs and hiccups. I'm drowning in the bottom of the sea and I can't see the top anymore. After what feels like forever, I reach for my phone and dial the number of the only person I trust most after Nick.

"Rosalee, I need a friend right now" I manage to say between sobs

"I'm on my way" the tone of her voice tells me she's just as devastated over Monroe as I am about Nick.

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 **A/N: Thanks for your supportive reviews. I'm always eager to read them. You guys rock :) Xx**


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N: I'm sorry it took me so long to finally post this bonus chapter. I've had a hectic week :( Katerinaptrv and Daniel6 requested this chapter. Hope you'll like it :)**

 **And thank you for your great reviews, they always bring a big happy smile to my face :D (and boost my muse with her ego :D)**

Bonus Chapter 16 : Key Move 5X11

Nick's POV

"Hatred paralyzes life; love releases it. Hatred confuses life; love harmonizes it. Hatred darkens life; love illuminates it." Martin Luther King Jr

It's funny how every emotion has a name. How every state of mind has a label. How every jumble inside your chest has an explanation, yet, the moment you mix those well defined feelings together they become this unknown, unnamed and unpredictable sentiment you're afraid to identify.

The peaceful life I once planned ahead was no more. My road map turned into ashes as fire started to consume slowly the sketches I made for my future. And just when I thought I could never experience happiness again, Adalind Schade took my hand and showed me the way out of the darkness of my heart, by destroying one by one the walls I built around it.

How can something so wrong feel so right and how can something so right feel so wrong?

I slept with Adalind.

I slept with the mother of my son.

I slept with the woman I was born to kill.

I slept with the person who made my life a living hell.

But that's not all. What she said right before we made love is what I've been obsessing over, ever since.

The thoughts of last night are struggling inside my head, trying to make their way to my heart while my heart has ideas of its own it wants to share with my brain and I'm stuck in the middle. I haven't stopped thinking about it since it happened. Not when she dozed off in my arms and I admired the peaceful expression on her face. Not when I busied myself at work to try and get something done. Not on the long flight to Stuttgart and certainly not now, while I'm driving a rental car en route to the Church where I suspect the treasure is hidden, with Monroe sitting in the passenger seat.

I'm listening to Monroe's babble about eyeglasses, but no matter how talkative he is, I can't take my mind away from last night. I can feel the words burning my tongue. I need to talk about it. I need to share this with someone and who's better than my best friend to entrust with something this big?

"I slept with Adalind" I burp the words before I have time to reconsider. There. Fast and easy. Just like pulling off a bandaid. Now that it's done, why don't I feel relief? Why do I still feel the mix of emotions contracting my chest? Why is my stomach still doing crazy pirouettes? Why is my heart…forget that one. I'm not going there. I'm not ready

It takes Monroe ages to finally react "What?" his eyes look like saucers about to jump from their sockets and I can't blame him given my history with Adalind. Geez, I'd be surprised too if I didn't have all those months to adjust to my new vision of her.

"I just thought I should tell you" I deadpan

He lets my words sink in, before he continues to speak "Ok, I mean it's not like you never slept with her before…But, this time you like…actually knew it was her, so that probably made it different" he scrutinizes my face looking for clues as to how I feel about it "I mean…did it?"

The moment he says those words, I feel the oxygen leave my lungs. It's a simple question and a closed one. The answer is easy, it's either yes or no. Yet, I'm stuck. What should I say? Was it different?

Hell yeah.

It was more that different. It was amazing, meaningful and heavy with emotion. I didn't sleep with Adalind believing she was Juliette. I slept with Adalind, knowing and wanting her.

When I got back home that night to tell Adalind about the keys and what we discovered, I knew she wasn't going to be thrilled about the idea of me flying to Stuttgart. I've come to realize, those past months of living under the same roof that my son's mother is caring and overprotective. I knew how much she hated the idea of me running into a horde of Wesen and when I saw the distress in her eyes when I told her I was leaving the next day, I've hated myself for that. I never wanted to see that look on her face again.

I don't know why or how seeing Adalind smile and laugh became so important to me, but it's a fact and I can't change it.

As she ran to the bedroom, leaving me behind, I felt suddenly a pang in the heart. I followed her, trying desperately to convince her I was going to be alright, but in vain. It was all over her face. The sadness, the worry and something else I wasn't sure of.

"I know I can't keep you from going and it's something you have to do, but I also know there's a chance you won't come back" her words crushed me because I could feel the pain emanating from them. God, how could I hurt her so much when all I want is for her and my son to be safe and happy? This, right here, is not what I want. This trip should make me excited and thrilled, yet all I feel right now while I'm looking into her eyes, is regret and sorrow and I realize I'm only going because I have to and not because I want to. What I want is to stay with my family and replace the frown on Adalind's face with a smile.

That smile that brings light in the darkness. That smile that makes my world still and my heart halt. That smile that enhances her beautiful features and leaves me breathless.

I take a step closer to her, only few inches separating us now "Adalind" I can barely say her name with the huge lump in my throat. What was I really going to tell her? That she was wrong? That I wasn't going after an eventual death? She's way too smart to believe it

"And I can't let you go without you knowing how I feel about you" how she feels about me! my heart speeds in my chest and I'm suddenly afraid to say something that would stop her from talking. I want to know, I want to hear her say it although I think I have an idea of what it is. I can't look away, she's all I see, all I want to gaze at, all I want to listen to. She brushes briefly her lips against mine, reminding me how much I've missed the feel of her soft mouth. How many times I've stopped myself short from kissing her. How much more I've been dreaming of doing to her and with her.

Her lyrical voice pierces my heart like an arrow "And I don't care if this is a mistake, I love you" My heart jumps in delight. She becomes everything in that instant. The world ceases to exist. I'm not a Grimm and she's not a Hexenbiest. We're just two ordinary people that life brought together in the most unpredictable way and who learnt to appreciate the beauty within each other.

Her beauty is, I realize it now, the reflection of her true self. The woman who's become part of me. A woman I can feel in every cell of my body. As I push her on the bed and get rid of our clothes, I show her what I failed to put into words, hoping she'd be able to decipher every gaze, every kiss, every caress.

Praying she'd see what she does to me the closer I get to my release. Wishing the words I whisper in her ear, find their way to her heart.

"So beautiful…I want all of you…I need you" I keep saying between kisses

When the blissful moment is over, I collect her in my arms as I can't seem to keep my hands off her, listening to her soft breathing as she sleeps. However I'm unable to shut my eyes as I think about our past, about our mistakes. How we both tried to ruin each other's lives. How she started the war, but I kept fueling her through my provocations. Can we move forward without being dragged by such a past?

Adalind moves in my arms, her ocean blue eyes warm and shining. I don't think I'll ever get used to her devastating beauty or her kind heart "Are you ok?" her voice is laced with worry

I'm instantly brought back to some intimate moments of last night "Yeah" I nod, still stroking her silky skin. I have no idea if I'll be able to drag myself out of bed. She's so addictive.

"Really!" she wonders with that dazzling smile. She's so cute and if I didn't know better, I'd just show her how really ok I am.

"Are you?"

I know exactly what she's thinking about, because I've spent the whole night turning it in my mind "If anyone had said what we did last night was even a possibility given how we met…"

"Yeah, I wouldn't believe them either" I unconsciously hold her tighter against my chest, not wanting her to move.

Monroe's hard eyes on me, remind me he's still waiting for my answer "The first time I slept with Adalind, I thought it was Juliette…and when I slept with Adalind the other time, it actually was Juliette" if my life wasn't this twisted mess, I'd find the whole situation quite hilarious "This time" I swallow, nervous all of a sudden about what I'm about to say "I was with the mother of my child, so, yeah, I would say it was very different"

Monroe smiles in understanding and I feel the need to defend her. I don't want anybody to see her as the bad old Adalind, because she's not that woman anymore "She's changed so much" and she means a lot to me. I want my friends to accept her and to get used to her in my life because this is not something I'm willing to change.

"Ohhh yeah" Monroe nods in agreement "I just hope she stays that way"

Yeah, so do I, I think to myself. The whole idea of her going back to being a Hexenbiest scares the shit out of me. I have no idea what it would mean to us when the Hexenbiest in her is back.

We'll cross the bridge when we get to it, I guess.

"Do you think you are in love with her?" My best friend asks after a brief hesitation.

Am I in love with her?

My mind drifts off to Juliette, immediately. Everything was so simple with her. We dated, we fell in love, we moved in together and I was ready for the next step. It was predictable. Following a certain logic. Even falling in love with her wasn't spontaneous or unexpected. It seemed only normal to develop those feelings after a while. No complications, no drama.

With Adalind, we started from the last step heading toward the first one. Nothing was predicted, nothing was easy, nothing came simple and where I wanted to fall in love with Juliette, I struggled to keep my heart safe from Adalind, in vain.

How I feel about Adalind is so different from how I ever felt about Juliette. Then it hits me. Love can be different from a person to another. We don't love the same way two very different women.

"I don't know" I tell Monroe honestly, unable to name the feelings I have for Adalind


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N: Sorry for the delay, despite how much I liked "Into the Schwarzwald" I wasn't inspired enough to write a new chapter :( But, I finally moved my lazy pants and did it today. So, here it is :D Hope you'll like it**

 **Oh, and I can never thank you enough for your fantastic reviews. You have no idea how happy they make me.**

Chapter 17 : Into the Schwarzwald

« Come-on, Adalind » My mom's stern voice made me jump « Hurry to bed, or the Grimm will come get you for being a bad little girl » I had no idea what a Grimm was, but the menacing tone my mother used whenever she brought him up, told me he was probably bad news. I shut quickly my coloring book and hooked it under my arm along with my crayons as I stuttered toward my bedroom. I hopped on bed and my mom pulled the covers to my chin.

As she started to stand up, I finally mustered enough courage to ask her a question that was humming in my three years old head for quite some time "Mom, what is a Gwim?"

Even saying the word, sent shivers down my spine. Sure, I had no idea what or who this Grimm thing was, but I did know it was someone or something I needed to avoid like leper, if I was smart.

Guess I wasn't that smart, after all

My question got my mother's attention. She sat back on the edge of my bed as she pushed a strand of blond hair away from my face. I was a miniature replica of her. Same golden locks, same piercing blue eyes, same rosy lips "A Grimm my dear" she displayed one of her rare smiles for the big occasion (scaring off your daughter must be a Hexenbiest thrill) "Is a terrible monster, who would come after the likes of us and tortures them until they beg him to kill them" I gasped, terror grazing my skin and sinking in my veins "His eyes are so dark that they look like two tremendous holes right under his forehead…But, don't you worry child, I won't let him hurt you"

Thanks for offering, mom, but you got killed by a Grimm first

Oh and I almost forgot, remember how I told you (more like I informed your dead body) how I was having a Grimm's baby? Yeah, you do remember, I mean how could you forget, huh! Well, guess what; I'm in love with my baby's father, the Grimm…Yeah, yeah, that same guy that you described as a cross between the boogeyman and the guy from the Texas chainsaw massacre. Clearly you had never seen a Grimm before, because you failed miserably at telling me how he could be so drool worthy that I'd wish I was never a Hexenbiest and he was never a Grimm.

I think you deserve to know another one of my secrets, guys. I mean look at you, so nice and attentive, always listening eagerly to my stories, so here it is

On more than one occasion, back when I was a wicked witch, I wondered what my relationship with Nick could be like if I wasn't me and he wasn't him. I was undeniably attracted to him physically, we seemed to bring out the worst into each other and in a very twisted way, it always highlighted the tension already there between us. So when I was thrown in jail and he came to visit me (not the type of visit one would wish for if you want my opinion) I pointed out how much fun we could have had under different circumstances, which technically wasn't wrong, because I've had the opportunity to confirm what a good match he is in bed…Twice

You should have seen his face that day, priceless

What can I say? I loved pissing him off and believe me, he wasn't all that innocent, given how much he enjoyed pissing me off as well. So, in a sick way, we were even

Sometimes, when the sandman forgets to stop by, I replay some moments of my good old me…it's totally sarcasm, I'm not old

I've been twisting in bed for the last few hours, trying desperately to find sleep but in vain. When did my sleep become linked to Nick's presence? The home feels lonely without him and he's been gone for only few hours. Geez, when did I start liking the fome and calling it home? It's bare and dark and scary…and it's where I share my best moments with Nick and Kelly. I guess somewhere between me liking Nick and me falling for Nick, I fell in love with the loft as well. It's a package deal sort of thing.

Love one, get one free

Kelly is sound asleep and part of me wishes he was awake, at least taking care of him would help ease my overworking mind. I breathe a frustrated sigh as I get out of bed and walk to the kitchen to grab a glass of water, although I'm not particularly thirsty.

"Can't sleep either?" Rosalee's voice makes me jump in the dark. She's sitting at the kitchen table, with all the lights off. Nope, not creepy at all

Flicking the lights on, I pour a glass of water and sit beside her "They will be fine, right?" I ask, not really expecting an answer. I can't believe how much I've become dependable on Nick and I don't mean it financially, because I know I can go back to work any time if I decide to.

We haven't had an actual conversation since I confessed my love to Nick and we tested the strength of our bed, especially since he left the very next day. I can't help but wonder if he feels the same. He didn't say it back and I fear the awkwardness that might interfere in our relationship when he's back.

"They will" Rosalee squeezes my hand on the table with a tight smile

%%%

Kelly and I are spending the day with Rosalee at the spice shop. It's quite fun being here, although all we're doing is sitting in the back room, me helping the best I can, Kelly playing with the giraffe toy that his father got him few weeks ago.

"Let me do this?" I take some boxes from Rosalee and start organizing the spices

Rosalee looks at me quizzically "You sure you can do that?"

I sigh "Of course, I can. I'm a witch, remember? We like to play with ingredients like this" I wince internally at my joke. Grrr, I hate my Hexenbiest history.

We hear the bell indicating that a customer just got in, Rosalee scurries away to attend whoever is here, while I organize the spices the best I can. More customers come and go, which leaves me plenty of time to finish up with the boxes. Just when I'm done infusing herbal tea, I hear Rosalee mutter a "it's horrible" before she storms in the back shop, face livid in shock. My heart halts instantly in my chest.

"What's wrong?" I ask her worriedly

Her brows are furrowed and she looks transfixed "Somebody killed Andrew Dixon"

"The guy running for mayor?" I'm equally shocked

"Yes, he was shot at a rally just a couple of hours ago" Holly cow, that's shooting someone in public is a bad bad omen.

"Oh my God, did they get who did it?" I wonder

Rosalee seems lost and for good reason, that's not the type of news you hear very day "I don't know, a customer just told me, she didn't know anything other than that"

The sound of the bell interrupts us once again and Rosalee leaves my side reluctantly to carry on with her work. I'm so shocked, I'm unable to resume what I was doing right before she told me the terrible news. A politician was shot in public and the murderer might still be running free! I feel cold suddenly, but I'm soon swept away from my thoughts as I hear Rosalee and what appears to be a male voice shouting. Through the few words I caught from her, I can tell they know each other, which makes me hesitate to intervene, but I quickly change my mind when I hear a huge fuss, glass shattering on the floor and yelling.

Rosalee is in danger. I don't think twice before I run to the front shop only to gasp at the sight before me. A blond male, probably in his early thirties, with ripped clothes and a mean face looks down at my friend who's lying on the ground with her hand covering her face. That bastard must have hit her. Pure fury is boiling inside me. I want to hurt him for putting his dirty hands on Rose "Stop it, leave her alone"

He turns his angry eyes on me. Up close, he looks like a junky in need of his next fill "How much money you've got?" I panic as he starts taking steps in my direction.

I don't have much, buddy. You should have visited me in my old glory days as a lawyer

I take a step back, heart hammering against my chest "I'm calling the police"

"The hell you are" and the next thing I know, the guy woges into a terrifying Wesen. My heart accelerates in my chest. My son is few feet from me. I don't care about my life as much as I care about my son's and right now, I have no idea how to protect him or my best friend, who's still immobile on the floor. Fear and pain are crawling in my skin like actual pins drilling holes in my flesh and all of a sudden a striking pain contorts my insides, it's like my skin is being ripped from the inside.

The mean looking Wesen lifts his hand ready to slap me, but instead his fingers break one by one while he shrieks in agony. Rosalee who's now standing, gazes at the scene unfolding before her eyes with visible terror.

And that's when my worst nightmare comes true. I'm back to being a Hexenbiest

"Oh my God" I repeat incessantly as soon as blondy is gone "Oh my God" I cry over and over again.

This is not happening. It can't be. I don't want to go back to being a witch. I'm scared of how it makes me; mean, power driven, uncontrollable.

"It can't be back. I don't want it back" I'm in a daze as Rosalee puts her hands on my shoulders and directs me to the back room. Maybe, if I repeat those words like a mantra, it will keep the Hexenbiest suppressed. Maybe if I say them enough, I'll wake up and realize it was just a very bad dream.

"Maybe it's just temporary" she breathes as we sit facing each other. I know she's only trying to reassure me, nonetheless, we both know what just happened means to me

"No, no, no, I can't have it back" tears are streaking down my face "I never want it back. Please, please, you can't tell Nick. Please, promise me you won't tell him anything" This is what being a Hexenbiest does, it ruins whatever you have. My new family, my new friends, they will all turn their backs on me. I will lose all those people I love and care about.

Oh my God. Nick will be disgusted by me. He lost Juliette because she became a Hexenbiest. It evokes nothing but dark thoughts to his mind. He won't accept me as a witch. He will probably take Kelly from me as well. I will lose the two men of my life at the same time.

Can't I ever be happy? Can't I have a normal life? I just want to be an ordinary mom and Nick's girl, but my reality always catches up with me, to remind me that life can never be simple. I'm devastated

"I won't tell him" she shakes her head and gives a reassuring tug to my hand "But, you can't keep this from him. If it happens again, it will be so much worse if he found out and you hadn't told him" Rosalee states out and I know she's right, but I need some time to process this whole situation under a new light. I need to get ready for what's to come

"I don't want to go back to being that" I barely whisper with my throat clogged

"You are so different now, maybe it will be different even if it came back" Rosalee is doing her best to cheer me up, but nothing is working. My brain is a wreck.

I shake my head, wanting her to understand what it means "You don't know what it's like to be a Hexenbiest, what it does to you. The way it makes you think, feel. It's not good"

She pushes to her feet "Maybe we can find a way to boost the suppressant" she starts immediately to search for a way to block the Hexenbiest within me from coming back. Despite my gratefulness, I know better than to raise my hopes.

I stand up reluctantly, gather my and Kelly's belongings and put my son in his stroller "We should go home" I inform Rosalee, my voice laced with sadness "You don't have to spend the night with us" I know how much being a Hexenbiest scares her and I really don't want to inflict that on her. She's a valuable friend that I've come to love dearly and I care about the way she feels. Besides, she's got to deal with her own load of problems from what I could see earlier. That man seemed to know her way too well. I guess she needs some time alone as well.

She turns her attention on me and exhales "His name is Tony, he was part of the group I used to crash with for a while in Seattle" she admits sadly "Sort of a low point of my life. No money, bad relationship. Experimenting with way too many things. Wish I could just bury that entire part of my life"

Her admission fills with sadness. I always pictured Rosalee as this perfect, kind woman. So, this comes as a total shock.

"Did you do anything like that, when you were young that you regret?" she wonders in a soft voice

I shake my head "Not really, I was kind of a nerd student. I guess I wanted to prove to my mom that I was nothing like her, so I became a lawyer" How weird! Anyone would think I was the reckless young woman and Rosalee was the perfect girl, while it's actually the opposite. Appearances deceive, but let's not be judgy, ok

As a Hexenbiest, I did terrible things that I would more than gladly bury six feet under ground

"Oh" she smiles, but it's quickly replaced by a frown "How are you feeling?"

It's like all the weight of the universe is on my shoulders "About the same" I admit

Rosalee shakes her head apologetically "I couldn't find anything that could help" she drops her book on the desk, out of frustration

"You won't" I state without a hint of surprise "A dead Hexenbiest isn't easy to come by" and honestly, I don't know if I'm ready to drink another dead person…Scratch that, I totally am for Nick and Kelly, but like I said, it's not like we have a private Hexen graveyard

The phone rings, interrupting our unproductive conversation. Rose hurries to get it and my heart does a backflip in my chest the moment I realize who's the caller.

Monroe

"Where are you…did you find anything…she is…" I'm dying to know what he's telling her. If they are alright. If they found what they were looking for.

Rosalee hands me the phone, telling me Nick wants to talk to me. God, I want nothing but to hear his voice. I was so worried and as soon as I bring the phone to my ear with my trembling hands, I realize how much I miss him "Nick?" I say warily, as if he could sense the Hexenbiest in me through the phone.

Stop being a chicken, Adalind

His voice is eager and breathy "How are you and Kelly?"

My heart skips a beat. I hesitate, unsure as to what I should say. Kelly is fine, but me, not so much, so guess what; I'm back to being a Hexenbiest. Crazy, right. What? Oh, you want to kill me!

Probably not a good idea to tell him the truth, right now

"We're good" then I deflect quickly the conversation "How are you?"

"We are…." Nick's hesitation tells me there's something going on, but I don't push, he'll tell me when he's ready "Coming home" the rest of his words come in a whisper, like he doesn't want anybody but me to hear him "Look, I just wanted you to know that we're ok and I'll see you soon" his statement makes my heart flutter and sink at the same time. He thinks he's speaking to the Hexenbiest-free Adalind. Would he still think the same of me when he discovers it is back?

Doubt it

"Safe flight" is all I manage to mutter, dreading the storm of tears and sobs that's preparing to break

Back to the fome, I put my baby delicately in his bed after I fed him and changed him. He's not asleep yet, but it won't be long before he shuts his beautiful baby lids. I cried the whole way home. No matter how many times I turned the different possibilities in my head, they all ended up with me losing the man I love.


	18. Chapter 18

**A/N : Sorry it took so long. It's just that the last episodes weren't that inspiring :-( And is it just me or is Nick really being a bit cold and insensitive with Adalind?**

Chapter 18 :

"If all else perished, and he remained, I should still continue to be; and if all else remained, and he were annihilated, the universe would turn to a mighty stranger." Emily Bronte

How inaccurate to believe that we already know everything we have to know about ourselves, about our lives, about what's best for us, when actually we don't know a thing. We let our inner self believe it figured out love, it figured out hate and it figured out our limits, when we're just a small piece of the gigantic plot of the universe.

We assume, we suppose, we imagine until someone walks into our world and changes it forever. They walk through the doors of our heart without asking for permission and suddenly they become our universe. Our soul exhales in relief, stars finally align and this person that just walked in feels like it's been there forever.

Only then do we understand that we don't know a thing.

Before Nick Burkhardt, I didn't really know happiness, kindness and more importantly…Love. He taught me all those marvelous feelings and now, I'm about to lose it all.

Since the moment I realized I was pregnant with Nick's baby, I've been nothing but honest with him, yet here I am, hovering over my baby's bed, dreading my confrontation with the man I love once he's back. Debating whether telling him the truth is a wise decision. After all, some truths are better untold.

The door of the elevator opens bringing my heart to a halt. He's here. He's back. I'm feeling both excited to see him and apprehensive to confront him. I'm desperate to run into his open arms and hold onto him forever, but I have no idea where we're standing after I confessed my feelings to him, especially now that my Hexembiest is back.

"Hi" he walks in, clearly exhausted from his travel

"Hi" I exhale, standing awkwardly in the middle of the bedroom, wondering what I should do. Maybe, it's better to wait for him to do something.

"How's Kelly?"

"Good, just calmed down" I start to walk in his direction "So where have you been? I thought you'd be home by now"

"I had to stop at the precint" he walks to the bedroom and I try to hide my disappointment. The precint? Seriousely? I mean didn't he miss us. I missed him like hell and there I thought he'd want to see his son first thing when he's back, but I guess we're not on the top of his list of priorities…Grrr, Adalind stop it…This whole Hexenbiest thing is messing with my head.

Nick passes me by, without so much as a glance and I ignore the pang in my heart. He never said he returned my feelings and if I'm being honest with myself, I don't expect him to either. After all we've been through, I'm surprised myself about how I feel about him.

"How was Germany?" I ask while he checks on Kelly

He sighs "Well, we found something buried. Whatever it was it was a bunch of bones in a catacomb" he puts his bag on the floor as I walk toward him

"You didn't find out what it was?" With all the ancient books I read, I could probably help, but I'm not sure he'd accept my offer. I guess deep down, Nick is still uneasy about sharing this kind of stuff with me and I don't blame him.

He shakes his head "No"

"Well, I'm glad you're home" I admit. It's like I can't breathe until I'm sure he's sound and safe.

Closing finally the distance between us, Nick takes me in a brief and awkward hug. We're still adjusting to this alien situation we're in. What are we now? Non-dating parents with benefits? Unrequited love is something I know all too well, but I never loved someone like I love Nick, so I have no idea how to deal with this

"Are you hungry?" I try to act nonchalantly

"Just tired" and the second he leaves my side, I feel lonely and stressed out

"Hey" I turn to face him, my reason and my emotions engage in another crazy battle over whether I should tell Nick or not "While you were gone, I was thinking…that stuff we made was just a suppressant"

Nick has his back to me as he retrieves clothes from the closet "Yeah, I know"

Alright, I can do this. Inhale, Exhale…Easy, see! "So what happens when it wears off?"

"If you become a Hexenbiest again?" Nick feels the need to clarify. Maybe he's just trying to gain time to process the idea. Surely he's thought about it before.

"Yeah, how would you feel about that?" Nick loses a bit of his composure, as he stares at me in utter surprise "We just never talked about that"

He resumes walking, never breaking eye contact and the closer he gets the more anxious I get "I don't know, I mean we have Kelly to think about, now" he closes the distance between us "What are you worried about?"

"Well you could kill me" Duh and the possibility of you throwing me out of the house and taking Kelly away from me. I couldn't live with that. Why is life always playing games with me?

Nick gives me that lopsided smile I've come to love so much "I could say the same about you"

For a second, I'm completely lost in the moment, resisting the urge to kiss that smile from his face, because a) I'm dying to kiss him and b) it's not a smile worthy situation and c) did I say that I'm really really dying to kiss this man?

"Look, when it happens we'll deal with it and we're not what we used to be…we have a son" That's it? It's all we have?…a son?

I could write a novel on unrequited love by now, giving away tips on how to get over it. I'll dedicate a chapter on how to pick the wrong guys and another one on why always fall for the ones who will never return your feelings. Maybe I'm into auto-destruction. I might thrive male affection because my father was never around, so I throw myself at men who'll abandon me at the end….Shut up Freud…I'm done reading your books.

"Yeah and I don't want to talk about this anymore, I'll just go to bed"

The following day, while Nick went down the pit once again to try and open Hades gates to hell (Yeah, that's how I baptized it), I got the most unexpected call ever. Sean Renard himself, asking me to meet him and not tell Nick about it. I don't really know why I accepted in the first place, I guess part of me wished he'd tell me something about my daughter's location. Hearing Sean's voice did nothing but bring back bad memories and hurt to the surface.

Nick walks out the pit just when I finish my phone call with Sean "Any luck?" I ask him

"Sort of" he breathes tiredly

"You got the door open?" I'm glad somehow, at least he won't go down again

"Yeah" he puts his tools on the table

"What did you find?" clearly not Cerberus seeing how he seems intact

"A tunnel, I'll have to check it out later but I'll take a shower first"

O watch as he makes his way to the bathroom, while I process my conversation with Sean. I hate hiding things from Nick. It feels all kinds of wrong, but isn't he just the same, hiding most Grimm related things from me, although I don't blame him for that.

%%%

I'm sitting at a table in the café where Sean and I agreed to meet. I have no idea what he wants to talk about and the only reason I came is that deep down, I'm hoping it's about Diana. Guilt is biting on my skin like a famished snake from keeping this a secret from Nick, along with my Hexenbiest being back. When did I start hiding things from him? From the moment I met Nick, I never hid who I was from him, no matter how bad things were at the time. I don't have time to torture myself further as Sean appears in front of me.

"Thanks for coming" he takes the seat in front of me

I don't bother with an answer, because I'd rather be anywhere but here and he knows it damn well. I'm tempted to leave right now and not see his face ever again. He stares at my baby's stroller and my protectiveness hitches "So, this is Kelly"

This mundane conversation is ridiculous. I don't want Sean anywhere near Kelly

"What do you know about Diana?" I go straight to the point, unable to contain my curiosity and hope any longer. Sean understands that I have no intention to talk about anything else, but carries on with his pleasantries

He studies my face for a moment "You look good"

"So do you" hope that's enough to get me what I want "So, what do you know about Diana?"

He sighs "You remember Meisner?"

Sure, I do but what does he have to do with this?

"I've seen him, I know he's here"

"Wait, you've seen him and he hasn't told you?" Sean looks perplexed

Alright, what's going on here? "Tell me what?"

"He was in the helicopter that night" what the…I'm scared to hear the rest of the story "He killed the king and he took Diana"

Wow, that's impossible, he would have told me, wouldn't he? "Meisner has Diana!"

"I said he got her, not that he has her" Sean jumps in

"Then who does?"

"I don't know, but he told me she was good and she was with the resistance. Meisner assured me that she was safe"

I can't believe what my ears are transferring to my brain. Is that some kind of sick joke?

"And you haven't seen her?"

"No, but what's important is that our daughter is alive and safe and not with the royals" I want to kick this bastard. He doesn't have an ounce of compassion or affection for his daughter. How could I ever think I loved him?

"I want to see her" I almost choke in my words, fighting the urge to yell and cry all at once

"So do I, but we'll have to be patient"

That's it, I can't take it anymore "I've been patient, I want her back" I shout and reach for my glass of water unaware that the glass landed in my hand with the strength of my will only, which didn't escape Sean's attention…shoot…He's the last person I want to share this secret with

"Well, that's interesting" he scrutinizes me "Does Nick know?"

All my previous bravado vanishes "No"

"Are you going to tell him?"

I want to tell him to mind his own business, but decide otherwise "I don't know" I say honestly "and you can't tell him"

"That seems very familiar" he laughs

"I'm serious Sean"

"If he finds out you're a Hexenbiest again, things might turn out not so well" No kidding! Thanks for the tip kiddo, but I already know that

I can't believe his boldness "We have a son together"

"And we have a daughter together" he states seriously

Well, let me laugh at that a little. What is he trying to get at? Since when does he care so much about Diana or me?

"Oh, I should live with both of you. That would be fun"

"Don't forget what happened to the last Hexenbiest he lived with"

I won't, no worries "I'm not Juliette" when are they finally going to understand that Hexenbiests are not all the same

"I know" he nods and the next thing I know his hand covers mine on the table "I just don't want anything to happen to you"

Don't lose you shit, Adalind

I bring my second hand on the table to cover his and answer in a menacing tone "And I don't want anything to happen to _you"_ I stand up, eager to get as far away from him as possible, hope this time he got the message

%%%

Is there anything better that a good hot shower right after a long day? I quickly find the answer to my question as I get out of the bathroom and find Nick playing with Kelly.

Yeah, there is. It's watching the man you love lying on his back and playing with your baby. Wait, did you hear that? I think that my heart and brain just sighed dreamily in unison. WOW, now that's something to hold on to.

"Can you say dad? Can you say Momy?" he tries over and over again with Kelly in his arms "Can you say Grimm?"

"I think he's a little young for that last one" I laugh "How is he doing?"

Nick sends me one of those trademark smiles "Pretty good"

The sound of Nick's phone interrupts our happy family moment "You must be getting hungry because I am getting hungry…that's your phone, you want me to answer it?"

"Yeah" then he turns his attention on Kelly "You're holding me down, now aren't you?" he jokes with the little man

I'm still smiling happily as I bring the phone to my ear "Nick Burkhardt's phone"

The voice I hear sends shivers down my spine. Juliette's "Adalind"

"Jul…errr Eve?" She sounds like a robot

"How are you?" comes her calm voice. How about shocked? At loss of words? On the verge of a syncope?

Let's be civilized, ok "I'm fine…how are you?"

"I need to talk to Nick" she says in an automatic tone

Nick is looking in my direction "It's Eve, I think we should trade" I say as nonchalantly as possible

"Alright, coming over" Nick says over the phone as I hold Kelly

"That was creepy" I finally say once he ends the call "That's how she is now?"

"Yeah, she talks just about as much as Kelly" he sighs, clearly bothered by something "Look, I have to…"

"I heard, guess we'll sleep well tonight" always hiding my emotions behind sarcasm. I don't want him to leave. We rarely have time to spend together and whenever we think we do, something or someone interrupts us and for what? Always to throw Nick in the open arms of danger.

Tonight's time alone was a good opportunity for me to think things over. Finding Diana has never stopped being my main preoccupation and I don't want more secrets between Nick and I.

%%%

I'm still watching this stupid political debate on TV, wondering how in hell did Sean decide to run for this position when Nick enters home. For some weird reason, Nick's presence makes me panic "I don't think he'll make a good mayor" I rush to say "You know, considering all the things we know about him"

Nick nods knowingly "Yeah, that and him being a Zauberbiest"

"Not really known for his altruism" I add, knowing all about his selfishness

"Really" Nick jokes as he walks to the kitchen

I stand up as well, a sudden fear making its way in my mind. I don't trust Sean and I don't want him anywhere near us.

"Have you told him where we live?"

"No" Nick looks at me like it's the most stupid question I could ever ask

I follow him to the kitchen and put my mug in the sink "You don't trust him either"

He grabs a beer from the fridge "Not always…I would like to know why he's doing this"

I stare at the Tv "More power" I say absently "Hexenbiest and Zauberbiest find it very appealing"

Nick looks at me briefly then admits "Well, you don't need to be a witch to want power"

I cringe internally at the term he uses in reference to Hexenbiests "Probably not" I gather my courage and add "Hey, can I ask you a question about Diana?"

He comes immediately by my side and looks intently into my eyes, true concern emanating from them and the sight fills my heart "Of course"

"You said you saw her get into that helicopter with Juliette but Juliette wasn't actually on the helicopter" I'm referring to the night my daughter was taken away from me for good

He nods "I made an assumption and I was wrong"

"So maybe Diana was not either" my chest contorts at the mere idea of her being away from the royals all this time without me knowing "Is there anything you could do to find out where she is?" I can feel tears pooling in my eyes

Nick's eyes look away from mine and when I meet this beautiful green color again he says "I can try, but it's not going to be easy"

I appreciate his honesty

"Did Sean ever say anything about her?" maybe he knows her location and he's hiding it from me. After all, he's the reason why our daughter is God knows where.

"Not to me" he admits

I look away, trying desperately not to cry but pain is consuming me from the inside. Am I paying the price of my past actions? She's just a child. She's innocent.

All I want is for my family to be safe, to be happy, but even that is too much asking, that goes without talking about my relationship with Nick. I love him so much and I can't help but feel like I'm slowly losing him.

"What?" Nick wonders

"It just seems like no matter how badly we want something to work, there are too many things we can't control along the way"

Nick stares behind my back, probably sensing my despair and distress and when our eyes lock again, he bends slightly and gives me the sweetest kiss ever. In this brief kiss, I could feel his compassion and care and just like that, he lifts some of my burden from my shoulders.

"I'll see what I can do" he says as we break our kiss and he takes me in a tight embrace, showing me I'm not alone.


	19. Chapter 19

**A/N : The Grimm writers are getting on my nerves u_u I don't know why they're complicating things so much for Nadalind and Nick is not making any efforts to help Adalind open up…grrr…**

Chapter 19 :

Marcel Proust said "Let us be grateful to the people who make us happy; they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom."

Kelly and Nick are the undeniable source of my happiness, however I've come to realize that for me it can only be an ephemeral state, so can anybody blame me for wanting to make it last as long as possible?

Yes, my Hexenbiest is back. Yes, it's been already few weeks and I haven't told Nick about it. Yes, I am being secretive and dishonest with the man I love, but do you have any idea what it's like to live constantly in fear of seeing your world crashing down right before your eyes?

I do. It's like waiting for an imminent death and expecting each sunrise to be the last one you witness

The life I built with Nick is a house of cards that will tumble down the moment I tell him the truth, so instead, I'm clinging to what I still have until it's no more…until I gather the courage to set my conscience free and let go of my happiness at the same time.

Meanwhile, I'm getting ready for what's to come

I'm a cautious person…mostly (baby Kelly is my best act of carelessness). Few days ago, I contacted the law firm I used to work for and they were happy to hear from me. Finding a job comes on top of my list, once Nick discovers the truth, I'll be nothing but a liability, therefore, going back to being independent is vital, especially now that I have to take care of my baby. No matter what happens between Nick and I, I will never give up on my son.

Losing one child is tormenting enough

I feel a sudden rush of panic as noise wakes me up in the middle of the night and realize that Nick is not in bed with me "Nick?"

"Yeah" I hear him close the access to the pit and shuffle to the kitchen.

Recently, Nick has become cold and he's always on his guards. It's like we're back to square one. Sometimes, I even get the feeling he's watching me and whenever I open my mouth to say something he looks at me expectantly. What hurts most though, is the anger that radiates from his eyes. I can't help but wonder if Rosalee told him something. After all, she's his friend and she doesn't owe me anything.

"Are you ok?" I still hate it when he goes down there

He turns the water tap "Just getting some water, sorry, I was trying not to wake you up" he walks back to our bedroom and I pretend to believe him, swallowing back the hurt induced by his lie. What little progress we made during the past few months has gone to waste shortly after he was back from Germany "That's ok" I manage to say softly as I watch him settle back into bed "I forgot to tell you something" the moment these words leave my mouth, I'm surprised to have Nick's full attention for the first time in days, he stares at me like he expects me to tell him something specific…Or confess that I'm a Hexembiest again…nahh, that's impossible…I'm just imagining things, right?

"I have an interview at my law firm tomorrow"

A flicker of disappointment crosses his face, as if he wanted me to say something else "Oh" he pauses for a second before adding "You're ready to get back to work?" part of me is happy that he cares enough to ask me what I want. However, the answer to this question is probably not going to make him happy, because in all honesty, I'm not sure I'm ready to go back to work, Kelly is still a baby and he needs me. The only reason I'm going back to my law firm is to ensure a decent life for my son and I, once Nick discovers the truth and decides to throw me out.

I'm not ready for the Chronicles of a homeless Adalind

"Yeah, I am…as long as they let me bring along Kelly with me" Nick's expression tells me something bothers him, maybe he's afraid I might care more about my job than my family "You're ok with that?"

He gives me a small smile that doesn't reach his eyes "Yeah, if that's what you want" he lays his head on his pillow, insinuating the conversation is over

"Yeah, I think it's time" I say as I finally close my eyes, unable to stand his stiffness anymore. I can feel his hard eyes on me and it takes everything within me not to ask him what's wrong.

%%%

Nick left early this morning, well I don't see much of him lately, it's like he's avoiding me the best he can and it cuts deeply. After giving him a bath and getting him ready, I put my baby in his stroller while I get dressed for my interview. Few years ago, pampering myself was the highlight of my day, now it doesn't mean a thing to me.

"Come-on, pumpkin" I place Kelly in the car seat "Let's go to our interview, shall we?" my baby gives me an adorable smile and grips my hair "Ouch, you need to stop doing this to Mommy, mister"

As we finally make it to the reception, my former manager's assistant leads us inside his office, not without raising an eyebrow at the sight of my baby. People are centered on their careers over here so having a baby is sort of a taboo.

The door to the office opens and Harrison barges in with a big goofy smile on his face "Adalind" he walks behind his desk "So glad you are here"

"Harrison" I smile back "Thanks for being interested in having me back"

He presses his lips together "I won't lie, you were always a favorite around here…it was quite a blow when you said you had to take that job in Austria"

Memories flood my mind at the mention of this dark period of my life "It was what I needed to do at the time"

Harrison shrugs in understanding "Now, this must be Kelly" he smiles at my baby "We are so glad that your mother decided to come back to work" then he lifts his eyes to stare at me "But don't expect him to make partner at least until he's in kindergarten"

I laugh at his joke

He gestures to the chair I was sitting on right before he entered the office "Well, why don't you sit down. We'll talk about when you two can start"

Finally, we get to the interesting part "I can start pretty much any time you're ready" I sound more eager than I want to.

He woges instantly sending a surge of unease within me "Oh we're ready, it's always nice to have a Hexenbiest in our firm" a strong desire to run away as far as I can from here makes its way in my body, but I'm quickly discouraged as I remember the reason I came here in the first place "assuming you are still available in that capacity" I don't miss this hidden insinuation in his words, of course word spread that I lost my powers. How sad is that, huh? That I have to be a witch in order to get my job back. It takes a great amount of self control to hide my disgust behind a fake smile, before woging to prove him I'm still a member of the _Griffindor community "_ Same as ever" sickened by the satisfied look on Harison's face, I cast a quick glance at Kelly to remind myself that he's worth the sacrifice.

"Alright, alright" he sits back on his chair "So, I arranged for you a schedule that should be perfect for the two of you" he looks between me and Kelly "You won't have to be in the office full time, working from home is totally fine with me, when possible of course"

We go through the details of my responsibilities and what's expected of me

That night, when I was back home, a guest star decided to pay me a visit, someone I hadn't seen in ages and who I wished was held hostage in the confines of the sea by a very mad Poseidon, yeah you guessed right, Madame Juliette or more accurately 'Eve of destruction'. Coming face to face with her after all this time, I realize she's just the ghost of the woman I used to know. She walks, speaks and acts like a robot. Nothing in her is human and it scares the shit out of me.

"Are you here to kill me?" Well, sorry, maybe you expected me to engage in a badass fight with her, but she's way too strong for me, so my bravado ran out the door the moment HexenEve stepped inside the fome.

Her robotic voice sends shivers down my spine "Juliette might have, I'm not"

"What do you want?" I try to sound nonchalant, but deep inside I feel like I'm about to pee in my panty

"We didn't have a chance to talk face to face, I thought now might be a good time" she states. Wait, is she serious? This is not a high-school reunion where the school Bully and the president of the Glee club get to meet again. This woman tried to kill us my son and I.

"I'm not sure we have a lot to talk about" Why doesn't she take the hint?

"We don't, but things are happening very fast and there is something you do need to know…you will be approached by Black Claw, they will try to drawn you in"

That's ridiculous. Black Claw has nothing to do with me…unless…unless, they want to use me to get back at Nick "Why would they want me?"

"Hexenbiests are valuable" she states like it's obvious and I'm stupid not to have thought about it. Well, sorry Eve but I have thought about it, nonetheless I wasn't going to confess my secret to you of all people.

"I'm not a Hexenbiest anymore" I hold her stare. Not even blinking (yay me)

"You're lying" Are my legs shaking?...yep, definitely shaking "I don't blame you, you're scared, you should be, with a child you are vulnerable" she closes the distance between us "But if you hurt Nick, I will come for you" she inspects the house, then adds "I like the new place" it's only when she disappears completely from the house that I release the breath I was holding.

She threatened me over Nick! I can't stop replaying the conversation in my head. What if Juliette is still in there? What if Eve is just an alter-ego? What Juliette comes back?

%%%

Harrison had a big stack of files waiting for me from day one of my "back to work" new routine, between Kelly and work, I barely had time to think the whole day, which is a good thing given how much I've been over-thinking the past couple weeks. When Nick comes back home, I'm still submerged by a ton of paperwork to fill and study.

Once again, instead of a warm greeting or a genuine smile, I'm faced with his hard look "Is Kelly asleep?" That's it, no 'hello', no 'how are you, Adalind?'

What if he feels awkward because I confessed my feelings to him and he doesn't return them? Or worse, what if he can sense the Hexenbiest in me? Is that even possible? If so, he would have confronted me, wouldn't he? Shoot, I'm going insane the longer I wait for judgment day to happen.

"Finally" I manage a smile, ignoring my pouting heart "I think he's teething" I try to concentrate on my documents instead of the now complete stranger that's in front of me. When did we become this weird couple that barely interacts?

Nick walks slowly toward me "Already?"

"Yeah, I think" I start to stand up, feeling utterly nervous around him; the weight of my secret becomes heavier with each passing day "I'm not really sure, I've never gone this far before"

He removes his jacket and places it on a chair beside me "How was work?"

Oh you know, the usual. Harrison woged, implied I needed to be a Hexenbiest to be back and guess what! Juliette dropped by, she sends her love by the way. So, yeah, nothing out of the ordinary….Some truths are better when they're buried six feet underground.

I nod "Ok" lie "It's good to be back" an even bigger lie, probably the reason why I can't look him in the eyes, he might call me on my lies.

"Is Kelly liking it?" he walks to Kelly's crib

"Yeah, we make a pretty good team" I smile proudly "It makes some pretty tough clients relax, so they forget about their problems" I finish organizing my files on the table

He walks back to the table, looking a bit uncomfortable "Maybe I should bring him to the precint"

"I'm sure he'd like a detective-men-dad time" I know I would love some quality time with Nick, we haven't had a single moment alone lately and I miss him like hell. We might live under the same roof, but we barely talk lately, let alone have some intimate moments with the man I love "which I wouldn't mind myself, except substituting Dad with lover"

Nick seems nervous all of a sudden "Yeah, I guess we've been both too busy lately"

Not really what I wanted to hear, I mean I would have liked it if he said we were on the same page "Yeah, I know things have been a little intense and I'm sorry…this isn't the easy used relationship because of how we started" I take few steps toward him, to close the distance separating us "Trust isn't a natural thing for us" Nick glares at me like I've just put salt on an open wound, God, I want to know what's on his mind, why he's so cold and rigid, why he's so angry with me, but for some reason I can't bring myself to ask him "but I think we need to work on that" I gauge his reaction before taking the initiative, his eyes drop to my lips and I know he wants this as much as I do, but something is keeping him from acting on it. I give him a soft kiss and although he's quite passive at first, he immediately leans in to deepen it. As the kiss intensifies, I'm relieved to feel his desire for me "This is not stopping here" I say, once we break our kiss and although his expression is still hard, I can see lust in his eyes.

Tonight is not about sex, it's about love making because it's the only manifestation of affection I can get from Nick. Sadly, it's all he's willing to offer me, when what I really want is his heart.

%%%

Tired of the secrets that are burdening me, I decide to let loose of all those little omissions that mean nothing, keeping only my Hexenbiest from Nick, as I know this one particular secret will destroy us. After rummaging all night, trying desperately to find sleep and peace of mind, I finally decide to wake Nick and tell him about Sean Renard.

"Nick, Nick, you need to wake up"

"What's wrong?" he keeps his back to me

"I need to tell you something"

Nick turns to face me completely "Ok"

"I talked to Sean Renard"

He looks both surprised and irritated, I know his relationship with his captain isn't at its best as for lately "Why?"

"He called" I feel nervous "He wouldn't tell me what it was about on the phone, he wanted to meet…it's Diana, he…he said she's with the resistance"

Nick jumps in bed, taken aback "Why would he tell you this now?"

"I don't know, I think he's going to use Diana to get to me for some reason" I don't trust Sean and I'm positive he won't hesitate to use our daughter to get what he wants. Yeah, never pretended to have good taste in men "I'm sorry, I should have told you sooner"

Nick looks away for what feels like forever, before finally saying what he was thinking of "We think that Renard is working with Black Claw"

What?

"Are you sure?"

Nick nods "Yeah, but he doesn't know we know and for now it's better that way"

If Sean works with Black Claw and is elected mayor or Portland, it's going to be fatal for us, given his position. My blood turns icy at the revelation

"I'm scared" I admit

"If you hear from him again, tell me" he demands and I know it's in my own interest to follow his orders.

We try to go back to sleep but in vain.

Whatever Sean has in store for me, it's not going to be good. So, when he called me the very next day to tell me we needed to meet and not tell Nick, it instantly spiked my suspicions, but if there was a chance I could get more information about my daughter's whereabouts, I was going to take it. I spent years looking for her and the mere possibility of being reunited with her is worth any risk. No happiness is complete without her.

I called Rosalie and asked her if she'd agree to watch Kelly for me, claiming I had a business meeting, she gladly accepted. As I got the baby to the spice shop, Rosalie asked me how were things between me and Nick.

"I haven't told him, if that's what you're asking" I referred to my big bad secret "Every time I'm about to, I just freeze up and nothing comes out" I admit, ashamed with myself for keeping such a thing from him.

"You can't keep this from him forever" she states apologetically

"I know" I try to fight the tears stinging in my eyes and swallow the lump forming in my throat "Well, everything you need is here" I gesture to the baby bag "And I have my cell, so if you just need anything…"

Rosalie smiles affectionately "We'll be ok, don't worry"

The idea of leaving Kelly, even for a few hours only, makes all kinds of anxious and worried, despite how much I trust Rose now. I head out the spice shop reluctantly, only motivated to walk by the possibility of finally finding Diana.

When I make it to the place of our appointment, I feel nothing but a rush of disgust when I see Renard "Adalind" he walks to me "I'm sorry it has to be this way"

I'm immediately suspicious "What way?"

When I see the man behind him, I know it's a trap but it's too late, somebody grabs me from behind and plants a needle in my neck, my woging is useless. I barely mutter a "Bastard" when I pass out, probably sedated.

When I open my eyes again, I'm in a sort of depot or warehouse, surrounded by a bunch of men. I try to stand up immediately as I adjust my vision and recognize Sean, but he speaks before I move "No, wait"

For some unexplained reason, I decide to obey and see what he wants to show me, hoping it has to do with my daughter, but what I see is way more that what I expected.

"Diana?" I can't even process what's happening, is it a dream? I spent so much time mourning her loss that I can't believe she's here. The beautiful little girl runs in my arms "Diana" I scream out of a mix of joy and agony

"I missed you so much"

I close my eyes briefly to savor the moment "I missed you too" but when I open my eyes, I see red. Those who took her, will have to pay.


	20. Chapter 20

**A/N: My heart broke for Adalind and Nick :( And Eve…seriously, I hate that she interferes so much in Nadalind's relationship and it's always to tell Nick not to trust Adalind u_u Can't she mind her own business?**

CHAPTER 20 : With love comes sacrifice

John Steinberg said in his last novel The Winter of Our Discontent "It's so much darker when a light goes out than it would have been if it had never shone."

Would it hurt any less if I had never fallen for Nick in the first place? Yes, definitely. Do I wish my feelings for him to evaporate in shiny particles of dust? No, for it is the best decision my heart has ever made. When our time together comes to an end, I'd be proud to say that I have loved a good man. A man who's always treated me right, a man who's always been kind to me, a man who put his duty before everything else and I'll always be grateful for the life he's offered me, despite how short it was.

The clock is ticking and my time with him is reaching its end. I knew it the moment my daughter Diana ran in my arms, causing an explosion of happiness, joy and relief. Diana was back and I wasn't going to lose her ever again.

"You're so grown up" I put a strand of platinum blond hair behind her ear, her deep blue eyes stare back at me adoringly, she looks so much like me, I realize proudly

"You look so pretty, mommy" hearing her call me mommy makes my heart contract. I've dreamed about this moment for so long, but I dare not let my happiness overwhelm me. Afraid to wake up and realize it was just a dream, or worse, that my daughter is taken from me again.

"Are you coming with us?" she asks in a tiny voice laced with hope, reminding me of Sean's presence, after all, I know he only reunited us Diana and I because it will serve his own interests. My thoughts drift to my son and Nick. They're my family too. Why is Sean doing this to me? How can he ask me to chose? I feel sick and dizzy at the thought. I need to find a solution and fast.

"I'm trying" I reassure her

Diana shakes her head "But, you have to come with us" she seems a bit authoritative but I decide not to read too much into it.

Sean steps in "Mommy can't come with us, just yet" he walks to us, then plants his eyes on me like thousands of needles filled with his venom "But, hopefully soon" he says intently

"I want her to come now" Diana demands in a harsh voice that doesn't match her angelic features, purple rings form in her pupils and for a second I'm too stunned to react.

Sensing the tension irradiating from our daughter, Sean bends down and says in a soothing voice "Honey, mommy has a couple things to do first"

The sheet plates covering the windows of the warehouse start suddenly to shake, a clear sign of Diana's anger. Her strength is immense and I'm afraid to say, uncontrollable. I can sense the dark energy emanating from her in every inch of my body. I'm shocked to the bone. What has she become?

I can hear Sean calming her repeatedly but in vain "Honey, it's ok…Honey, listen to me…honey" but me, on the other hand I feel paralyzed, unable to produce a sound. My throat is clogged and my shock is visible. This is not the sweet baby that was stolen from me. Whoever took her from me, created a weapon out of the pure little girl "Would you do something?" Sean's pleading voice stirs me out of my daze. I bent immediately before her and try desperately to speak some sense into her "Diana, look at me" I have no idea if it is going to work, this is not something I've ever been confronted to "I'm right here, I just need a little more time" I fight the tears welling in my eyes, I'm scared of my own daughter. The sheet plates shake so hard that one of them flies directly from the wall to one of the pillars, missing shortly from killing one of us.

My shock and fear wash over me, like waves of electricity

"Ok" she says simply, as if she hadn't just almost killed someone, then takes her father's hand and leaves me in utter disbelief. Have I just imagined the whole thing? Nah, I saw it with my own eyes. She did it all with her will power.

It's only when I reach the safety of my car that I let go of my restraint and pour my despair and pain in big agonizing tears. I feel trapped in another dimension, a place completely out of my control. In my craziest dreams, I didn't expect such a thing.

"You're alright?" Rosalie asks me when I go get Kelly "You look pale"

The idea of telling Rosalie about tonight is very tempting, but the very idea of saying it out loud makes my blood ice cold "Yeah, just a bit tired" she doesn't buy it, but she's polite enough not to call me on my lie.

"Hey, sweet potato" I kiss my son the moment I hold him "Mommy missed you tonight…Did you have fun with Aunt Rose?"

He starts pulling my hair, which is his favorite thing to do, while Rosalie goes through everything they did. I'm grateful to have a normal conversation that takes my mind away from the insanity of my night, even for few minutes only.

Once we get home, I put Kelly directly in his bed as he slept in the car, then run to the bathroom for a quick shower. The feeling of hot water on my skin takes away some of my stress but I can't stop the wheels in my brain from reeling. Sean is working with Black Claw and running a campaign to become mayor of Portland. A family is good for his image. It shows stability and seriousness which would attract even more voters. We're nothing but a means to an end.

Once again, I'm being used by those around me. It's like going back to square one and the realization feels like a stab in the heart, sending a striking pain through my body.

It's happening Adalind, the house of cards is starting to collapse right before your eyes and you are impotent while facing so much injustice. I cried so much tonight that I don't even remember how I slept. I wake up in the middle of the night to the sound of Diana's voice "Mommy…Mommy" as I open my eyes abruptly, I see my daughter in a white night gown, standing at the foot of my bed "Where are you?"

I hurry toward her, eager to reassure her "I'm right here" I say, but as soon as I reach her, she disappears. Panic rushes over me and cuts like razor blades on my skin, my daughter is gone…again, she's been taken…Oh my God, it's happening again "Diana" I shout "come back", it's only then that I realize that it was just a dream. I jump from my bed and run to Kelly's bed, the sentiment of loss still engraved inside of me, but my son is not there.

"It's ok" I hear Nick's tired voice murmur while he's holding a crying baby in his arms "Kelly is hungry" he helps me lift the baby from his arms "We didn't want to wake you…everything ok?"

"Yeah" I lie "Just woke up and didn't see him in the crib, I got scared" Kelly calms down as soon as he hears my voice and sleeps in record time. Nick walks back to the bedroom, as I put my son back in his crib. His eyes stay on us and I decide to finally take the opportunity to tell him the truth, I can't hold back any longer "Nick, we need to talk"

His eyes light up as the words leave my mouth "Ok" he nods "Is there a problem?"

"Yeah" I admit "Sort of a communication problem" kind of an understatement, I know. I lift my hand and within a second the mobile phone that's on the night stand flies to my hand, but Nick doesn't look exactly surprised and I kind of expected it. I mean the change in his demeanor was a clear indication of it.

I go sit beside him "You knew, didn't you?"

Nick simply nods, as I sit, all this time I was petrified at the idea of losing him because my Hexenbiest was back, when he already knew and stayed anyway "I should have told you sooner" I'm so ashamed with myself that I can't even look at him.

He remains silent for a moment before finally asking "Why are you telling me now?"

"I wanted to" I face him, I want him to see the sincerity in my eyes, I want to see forgiveness in his "I wanted to" tears are burning the corners of my eyes and I fight the lump in my throat "I really did, I just got too scared" Nick covers my hand with his, making the nest of butterflies in my stomach fly in all directions while my heart jumps excitedly "I told you I would never hurt you" his beautiful green eyes shine with kindness.

"People change their mind, Nick"

His gaze drops from my face and I see pain contorting his beautiful features "I lost my mom when I was twelve" a charge of pain electrifies me, Kelly Burkhardt was a good person and I ache for Nick's loss "and I got her back and…I lost her again…I will never do that to Kelly" he says adamantly and just when I thought I could never love this man even more, he proves me wrong. It's like my heart swells so much with his love that it might explode anytime now

"And I will never hurt you" I shake my head while tears streak down my face "I'm just worried the world is never going to leave us alone" Nick takes me in his arms and kisses tenderly my forehead, not bothering with words, because this is our reality…this is out fate. We're doomed to suffer and lose the ones we love.

When I accepted the feelings I nourished for Nick Burkhardt, it was like I was brought to life from the dead and all the missing pieces of my heart finally collided. If only I could stop time, if only I could spend the rest of my living days with him, if only I could stop the external world from existing and it would be just the three of us against the world. Because without Nick, I feel incomplete, I feel broken and I feel hollow. I snuggle closer to him and inhale his sent, listening to the beautiful symphony of his beating heart. When h's finally asleep, I look at his beautiful face, watching the smoke of out burnt destiny.

%%%

"You have to schedule that deposition sooner rather than later" I tell Cassandra, my assistant through the phone "It's a court day, we can't keep this holding us" I sit behind the screen of my computer in the loft, when I hear Diana's voice calling me again

"Mommy"

Cold sweat drops from my forehead "I'm going to have to call you back" I tell Cassandra and hang up before she has time to reply

"Mommy"

I follow the sound of her voice, beyond scared "Diana?"

"Mommy" the sound comes from the bedroom, I turn around only to see her face behind the window "Where are you?"

I walk to the window, shocked to see her face crystal clear "Mommy, where are you?...I want you to come home, now…now" It's hard to miss the threatening tone of her demand. It's an order and she won't take no for an answer. What has become of my daughter?

Her image disappears and a sudden panic washes over me "No, Diana, Don't…" before I finish my sentence, I feel a striking pain in my head. It's like someone has just beaten me with a baseball bat.

Once I finally recover, I decide to forget what has just happened and get ready for my appointment with Mr Bonapart, one of the major clients of the company. I get Kelly and myself ready and head to the office, trying desperately to forget about this morning's events.

Harrison enters my office, followed by a man probably in his early fifties, wearing an expensive suit and a smug smile "Adalind, I would like you to meet Conrad Bonapart, a very important client…Conrad, Adalind Schade" Harrison gestures to me

"Nice to meet you" Conrad says curtly

Harrison's next words rise immediately my suspicions "He has a private matter to discuss with you, I'll let you two get acquainted" what private matter he could possibly want to discuss with me?

"Ah" Conrad Bonapart gives me a fake smile while walking in Kelly's direction "I think it's great that you bring your son with you to the office like this"

I try to hide my discomfort and smile politely. A very bad feeling is nagging at me, but I blame it on the events of the past days. I've become highly paranoid since then.

"I lost both my parents at a young age, so you should spend all the time you can with him" he exclaims

"I do" I smile proudly at my son "This is…"

"Kelly" Conrad Bonapart cuts me off and I know for sure that something is off about this guy

"Mr Burman told you?" I cling to the hope that this man is just an ordinary person, curious on the edge, but not at all dangerous…guess what, no such luck…I'm Adalind Schade, remember, the queen of bad encounters.

"You know, there's a word for when you lose your parents…it's orphan and there is word for when you lose a spouse and it is widow or widower" I don't see clearly what he's getting at and my discomfort rises with each passing second, the idea of taking my baby and running away is highly seducing at the moment "Many words for many things…but there is no word for when you lose a child" the threat in his eyes is unmistakable. He's Wesen and he's with Black Claw, of this I'm sure.

"What do you want?"

"Your present relationship is very unhealthy for you and Kelly" he states in his deep, cold voice "Your future is with us, not with the Grimm…you need to make a decision by the end of the day" ha glances one last time at my baby before leaving me completely shattered and terrified.

It's not just about Sean's image, Black Claw want a Hexenbiest in their rows. I'd be one more soldier, a very helpful one should I add, this is what it was all about. We're all part of this gigantic spider web that has one main goal, destroying humanity. My relationship with Nick is in conflict with the plans they seem to have for me, but what has me scared more than anything, is that I don't have a choice. My children's lives depend on it. It's either losing Nick or losing both Diana and Kelly. I cannot survive the loss of any of my children, but I can't fathom a life without Nick anymore, he's part of me. My happiness is directly linked to this man and Black Claw wants me to abandon him for Sean, that's so cruel. Why can't I finally reign on my life like anybody else? Why whenever I see a glimpse of happiness my being a Hexenbiest ruins it?

I crave normality more than anything. I don't care about power, recognition and wealth. This life, this loft, this relationship with Nick is what I want, but the world has other plans for me, whether I like it or not.

"I can't do this to your father" I tell my baby the words that I wish I could tell Nick, the explanation I wished I could give him "But, I can't lose you or Diana"

The ring of my phone interrupts me, it's Sean, I want to break the inanimate object as if it could hurt physically my caller, but I refrain from doing so, knowing damn well it won't lead anywhere, my destiny has been sealed a while ago "Sean"

"You've run out of time, Adalind" he states

More tears streak down my face "Sean, please" I beg in a trembling voice

"We need an answer, now" his voice is emotionless and cruel, like he doesn't care about everything I'm about to lose and really, he wants an answer to what? Whether or not I'm ready to lose both my children? He knows pretty well I will never let such a thing happen. He only wants to know if I'm leaving Nick, right now, because he already has the answer to the main question…or could I call it a question? I don't think so, a question implies a certain rate of choice, when I didn't have any to start with. I was made an offer I'm not allowed to refuse at the risk of my kids' future…if they have any.

I sit at the table and start writing a goodbye letter, because I'm not ready to say it to his face, I would never be and I know if I did, he wouldn't let this happen.

 _My dear Nick,_

 _Sometimes love is not enough. Love is not always pretty and love is not always happy, but with you I discovered that love could be perfect with the right person. Have I ever told you that, that first time when I saw you near the coffee shop, my heart skipped a beat? I thought you were the type of man that could make me happy and indeed you did, Nick, you made me a happy woman and together we made a wonderful child that I wish will grow to become just like you._

 _My dear Nick, my love, my friend, I can never tell you how sorry I am for what I'm about to do and although you might never forgive me or even believe me, please do know that I wasn't left another option._

 _This is not our time, Nick, but maybe in another life, in another era, we would meet again and have that happy ending I dream of with you._

 _I love you more than you'll ever know_

 _Adalind_

Once I finish writing the letter, I realize the ink is running and the sheet of paper is too wet for anybody to be able to decipher what I have just written, although this letter contains not only words coming from my heart, but emotions in the form of sad tears that flooded it to the point where I have no other option but to throw it and start another one, this time shorter, because I'm not sure I can hold my tears for too long.

This time, I don't bother with an introduction, going straight to the point

 _I am doing something I have to do. I don't expect you to ever understand what I have done, it's the only way to protect my children and I don't expect you to believe this, but I love you_

 _I'm sorry_

I collect what little I have in this home that I've come to love so much, this place that holds the best part of my life. A memory in every corner, a spark of joy in every wall, the smell of happiness in every inch and the weight of my tears in every step I'm taking toward the door.

"Goodbye fome" I smile bitterly at the empty house "It might seem like I've taken all my possessions, but, believe me, I've left the most important thing I have….my heart"

%%%

A/A: thanks again for reading, following and reviewing :)

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	21. Chapter 21

**A/N: It was a very emotionally charged episode. I'm still hoping that Sean is actually feigning to work with BC to discover who's the head of the organization. Anyway, I wrote this chapter from Nick's POV. Let's invite ourselves into his head and try to figure out what it felt like for him.**

 **Enjoy**

Chapter 21 : "Give sorrow words; the grief that does not speak knits up the o'er wrought heart and bids it break." William Shakespeare, Macbeth

There are several stages of pain, several levels of hurt, several degrees of heartbreak but there's only one adjective to describe the loss of a child: unsupportable.

 _I am doing something I have to do. I don't expect you to ever understand what I have done, it's the only way to protect my children and I don't expect you to believe this, but I love you_

 _I'm sorry_

The words disappear as soon as l breathe the last letter of agony that has burnt my eyes with the acidic meaning behind it. she's gone…and she took my son with her. It took one night to strip me from months of unexpected happiness. How could she do this to me after all we've shared together? I would have protected her and Kelly, I would have done anything for them, but she decided to handle it on her own.

 _I am doing something I have to do_

 _it's the only way to protect my children_

 _I love you_

Those three sentences eco in my throbbing head over and over again. She was forced to do this and I know who's behind this; Black Claw and Renard. I'm going to end this son of a bitch and get my family back.

All the pain and anguish I suppressed for so long after my mother's death, comes back to the surface and adds up to the tremendous hurt I'm feeling right now.

I've lost way too many people during the past few years and I'm not ready to go through this again, this is not going to happen. I am not letting this happen. I grab my cell phone and dial Hank's number. We'll go to Renard's place and get my son and Adalind back. My heart hammers violently against my chest while I'm sent directly to voice mail. I can't wait a minute longer, I need to do something, so I run to my car and head as fast I can to the captain's house, but to my utter disappointment, the house is empty, not a single piece of furniture, not the slightest indication that someone has ever lived here. It's like the house was never inhabited. I try to control my pain the best I can and clear my head. I'll go to Rosalee and Monroe's, they'll know what to do…I need my friends now more than ever because hell I have no idea how to deal with this, my mind is on overdrive and I feel like my limbs are going weaker by the second. I can't wrap my head around it…She's gone, she left me and took my son with her.

"Adalind id gone…she left me and she took Kelly with her" I tell my friends in a frenzy as they open the door.

How could she do this to me?

"She didn't say anything?" Monroe hunches his brows together, clearly surprised and shocked

The words she wrote start pivoting in every direction in my head, I know them by heart, why wouldn't I? they tasted like blood on my tongue

"She left a note, she said that…she didn't have a choice and she had to do this to protect her children" I state angrily, my heart about to jump from my chest

Rosalee walks towards me, pain written all over her face "Oh Nick"

"Renard was pressuring her" Yes, she didn't leave me because she wanted to, I know this, she said she loved me, I know she cared. In a twisted, weird and completely inexplicable way I trust her, she's been there for me when I most needed her and she proved to be more than just an accident in my life, but a…friend? Is it what she represents to me "I mean she said she was afraid he would use Diana to get to her"

"You think she's with Renard?" Monroe wonders skeptically

"I went to his place and it was completely empty" I inform him, remembering how bare the place was when I got there

"Wait, when did she tell you about Renard?" Rosalee asks deep in thought

"A couple of nights ago"

She shakes her head angrily "That's when she came and dropped Kelly with me…she said it was about work and when she came back to pick out Kelly I could tell she was upset about something"

"Do you think it was about Diana?" Monroe scrutinizes his wife

"Meisner told me Diana was with Black Claw" I interject

This takes Monroe aback "How did they find her?"

"I don't know, probably Renard"

"Diana is how to get Adalind, I'll tell you that" What Monroe has just said is absolutely true and I know it. Nothing is more important to Adalind than her children and until tonight, I've always admired her dedication

Rosalee nods in agreement "That's why she left"

No no no, I can't let them do this…I can't let them have my son…I can't let them take the most important things in my life from me, but Monroe stops me from leaving the house, insisting we should have a plan before acting and using my son's safety as a reason to that.

After Nixon assassination, the new candidates for mayor are under high protection, I couldn't go anywhere near Renard. My only option is to seek help with HW, Monroe and Rosalee decide to accompany me on this mission, and I'm thankful for their help, because I can't really think straight right now.

With Black Claw tailing me, I split ways with my friends to get rid of the BC agents first, not risking to expose HW's location. Once we get to our destination, I'm glad to see that the whole team is there, including Eve.

As soon as we make it to their main office, Meisner shows us BC corporate structure. A sort of organigram, with Renard really close to the top. Black claw representatives, alive or dead listed based on their position in the organization. Unfortunately, we still have no idea who's the head of the organization.

Once Juliette finishes stating all the information HW gathered, I can't help but run to her side, eager to know how she guessed something was about to happen with Adalind. I mean she did warn me, but I was far from imagining that I'd go home only to find it empty. A flicker of hope travels down my body and help me put my legs in motion again. Maybe, just maybe, Eve can help me find Adalind and get my son back.

"You said you thought something was happening with Adalind" I say the words out of breath, because the pain contorting my chest is making it hardly possible for me to inhale and exhale properly.

Eve appears like she was expecting my question "Diana was mentally contacting her and I somehow intercepted it, like a….twin telepathy experience"

"Sort of got the wires crossed" Trubel explains

Eve continues, not giving me enough time to process the craziness of what she has just said "Did you have any contact with her?"

Her question produces a burst of anger and angst within me as I proceed to tell her about what happened "Adalind left me" I say the words fast hoping beyond possible that getting them out quickly would make the pain less intense, but in vain, because the look of pity I see on everyone's face makes me realize I probably look like hell, how would I not be? Adalind left ME, she didn't just leave period…she's gone and I'm left behind…One night, one single night was enough to take everything from me "She took Kelly with her" my heart cracks open as I say those last words.

Is there a greater punishment than losing the very reason you still want to live?

"Do you have any idea where Adalind and Kelly are?" Meisner's hard eyes tell me he's really unhappy about tonight, I've always sensed he felt something for Adalind, but right now is not the moment to think of it. I need to get my son back and fast

"My guess is Renard"

Eve scrutinizes me "Your being here means you haven't killed them yet"

"I get it" I'll inflict a very painful death on those bastards and make them regret ever targeting my family

"How do we get Kelly back?" Rosalee wonders

"Not by going after Renard" Meisner states

Trubel shakes her head "Black Claw has gone through a lot of trouble to put him in that position" meaning getting to Sean will prove very difficult" but I'm not backing off, he's just made a major enemy and I'll make sure he regrets _painfully_ his bad decisions.

"They've even created a family for him" Eve adds "Makes him more electable"

That's what it was all about from the beginning, stealing my family and owning it for the sake of becoming mayor. This whole sick twist tastes like bile and my rage grows even more. I see red around me, I've never wanted to hurt somebody as badly as right now. After all I've gone through, I never thought I'd suffer a greater loss than my mother's death and Juliette's betrayal, but this… tonight is something I can barely describe.

"I need to know where Renard is" I demand, unable to remain still anymore. I need to act, to do something

"Black Claw has him in a highly guarded house in Northeast" Truble informs me, but Meisner seems skeptical about my plan "If you go there, you will not survive"

As if I care…All I want is my son back, risking my life for him sounds like a small sacrifice

"They will expect you to be emotional and they will take advantage of that" Eve's expressionless face reminds me of so many memories from the past. It's not easy to dissociate the woman I've loved for so long, from the woman who set my mother up and tried to kill me and more importantly from the robot like woman standing before me.

"Oh that's easy for you to say" I spit vehemently, unable to contain my rage anymore "It's not your kid"

"No, he's not" she says without blinking. I don't konw why I said that, or what I really expected, maybe I was hoping for a fight, maybe I wanted a way to externalize my anguish, but Eve's answer stops me from going further. I head out the door, not saying a single word.

The emptiness of the house is unbearable, I can't even sit down. I feel like my blood is boiling, this place used to be so lively, so…homey and now it's just the ghost of what it was. It's not a home, if my family is not here…Adalind transformed it in a cozy place to live. When I first moved here, I wanted a place that didn't resemble a home in anything, I didn't want her to imagine anything, yet I was the one who started to feel more and more at home here

It's not the place you live in that makes it a home, it's the people you live with

"Hey" Trubel greets me as she steps out the elevator

"Meisner told you to follow me?" I know he was afraid I might do something stupid out of despair

"He did, but I would have done it anyway…look I want you to know that I'm with you on this, I'm going to help you however I can"

So many images are going through my head, memories of my family time here, beautiful moments spent together and finally the last words I got form her "Adalind left me a note" I start

"What did she say?"

"She said…she had to do what she did"

"You believe her?" she asks

I don't think twice before I nod "Yeah" I hesitate briefly as I add "and she said she loves me" I have never shared this with anybody, that wasn't the first time she confessed her feelings for me and I have never told her how I felt about her because I'm not sure what to call it

"Yeah, well…I knew that" Trubel doesn't look the least surprised "It wasn't hard to tell"

Although I understand Adalind's motivations, because I guess I'd do anything for my son's safety too, I'm extremely angry with her, she should have come to me, she should have asked for my help, she knows I would protect her and Kelly…why didn't she trust me enough?

I bite my jaw to contain my rage "I want my son back"

Trubel runs to my side "Nick, if you want to go right now, I'm with you" she shouts "I've got no problem taking them down…let's do it"

My phone interrupts our conversation, I can't believe my eyes when I see Renard's name on the screen "Yeah" I hiss

"We need to talk" he says in a poised, steady voice

What crap does he want to talk about? As I could give a damn

"Where's my son?" I grip the phone, seconds away from breaking it

"He's safe"

"You're not" and he'd better take my word for that

"Neither are you" he replies "But, we still need to talk face to face…I suggest we meet in neutral ground…My office, one hour"

As crazy as it sounds, I want to hear what he has to say. I instruct Trubel not to follow me and stay at my place instead. The short drive to the precint feels like the longest ride I've ever had. On my way there, I play all possible conversations I might have with him, but none is even close to what he's about to tell me.

I storm in his office, ready for whatever he has to say, my instinct tell me to beat the shit out of him, but my reason tells me to listen "You wanted to talk, talk"

"I'm not your enemy" like hell you're not

I try to cope with this insanity as best I can, I mean the guy has some serious issues if he thinks I'll believe that "You have Adalind and my son, doesn't exactly make you my friend"

"Believe it or not, I know how you feel" Is he seriously trying to create a rapport with me? He does realize I went through the same police program as he did. Negotiation techniques won't work on me, but I let him finish anyway "A couple years ago, I gave my daughter away to your mother because I trusted her and I trusted you"

Ok, I've had enough "You were asked"

"I was asked but I wasn't given much choice"

"I wasn't given any" I state the obvious, getting angrier by the second

Sean seems to realize he's at a disadvantage, because he keeps quiet for a few seconds, before finally saying "Nick, sometimes the only way to protect the ones you love is to let them go"

Breathe in, breathe our. Punching him to death is not going to solve my problems "And sometimes, the only way to protect the ones you love, is to kill the ones who threaten them"

This obviously irritates Sean, because he takes angry steps behind his desk "What did you think? That you could settle down with Adalind and have a normal life" I hate the sound of her name out his mouth, hearing him say it sound blasphemous, given their history, the very idea of them being under the same roof makes me want to throw up "A Grimm and a Hexenbiest"

What does he care? It's my fucking life and he doesn't get to tell me what's right and what's not. If I want to share my life with a Hexenbiest, so be it, but it's my decision to make, not his.

"I know what you're doing…you're working for Black Claw, they killed Dixon so you could take his place, they set you up to be a hero"

Sean points his finger at me "You are one of us"

I've never heard so much bullshit in one single conversation

"Like it or not" he carries on "You're a Grimm, you understand how things really work…our world will be more violent, more primitive but it's the only way for true progress"

At this point, I realize there's no point arguing with him, he's like entranced in this speech, BC managed to convince him and root its ideology in every cell of his brain. It's like trying to talk a member of a cult out of it, this is not something that happens easily.

"They want Grimms with them, not against them" he adds

"Black claw will kill any Wesen who doesn't agree with them, they are murderers"

"We all have blood on our hands Nick" Sean grits his teeth "This is a revolution and revolutions are forged in blood"

"What about all the people who aren't Wesen?"

"That's on us, work with me, together we can keep the bloodshed to a minimum"

There is no way I can do this. Working with a bunch of criminals is not in my agenda. I decide to go straight to the point as I see no reason to continue this unfruitful debate.

"I want my son back"

"If you work with us, you can have anything you want…Nick, this is not a fight that you're going to win"

I shake my head disgustedly "I don't think there are going to be any winners in this one"

As I go back to the loft, I make a very important decision. I take Trubel down the pit and show her where I hid the stick, explaining what it does and how important it is. She's the only other Grimm I know of and right now, she's the person I trust most. I'm going toward a probable death and I need to make sure someone trustworthy has it.

I know perfectly well that my chances to get alive out of this mission are at a minimum, but I don't care if I'm running into the arms of an imminent death, as long as it is a meaningful death. Life, if not shared with the ones you love, is not worth living.

%%%

After a sleepless night, I join my partner at the precint and tell him about the last events. I wasn't sure I wanted to go to work, but Hank mentioned a weird Wesen case. I was far from expecting, though, that it wasn't just a strange case, but a case directly related to us.

The guy broke into Hank's girlfriend's place and stole Hank's phone, then copied its content into his computer, after further investigation, we discovered that not only did the guy work for Black Claw, but so did Hank's girlfriend.

It wasn't a coincidence that she approached Hank once again, after all this time. I was their target from day one.

With Hank's help, we plan a trap for her, a trap in which she fell right away. After that, we decided to leave her with HW. Hank didn't want to have anything to do with her anymore. I can understand his devastation.

Meanwhile, I stay with HW team in the control room, watching live on tv Sean's election as mayor of Portland. Disgust curse through my veins as I watch him walk toward the center of the room to start his speech.

"Now, first I would like to congratulate my opponent, Steven Gallagher on a well fought campaign…I want to thank you all, my supporters, it's time for us to work our differences and work together to make Portland an even greater city than it already is…there are a lot of people that I need to thank tonight, but I would like to begin with the love of my life and the mother of my children, Adalind" the love of his life? The mother of his children? Never in my life had I wanted to kill somebody so badly. Adalind is not his and she's definitely not the mother of his children…I don't want her to be anybody's love….I don't want her to be in anybody's life except for me, but why? Why am I so devastated that she left me? It's not only about Kelly, I want both of them back

"Adalind please, come up and join me"

And there I see Adalind, devastatingly beautiful walking slowly and uncomfortably toward Sean with my son in her arms, the sight of them breaks my heart and reminds me just how much I can't live without my son…without Adalind.

Sean places his arm around Adalind's shoulder while she's holding my son and I know beyond a doubt that I won't back down, this is only the beginning of a war during which I don't mind sacrificing my life, for it is a cause I strongly believe in.

"You are dead" I whisper while my eyes stay glued to the screen


	22. Chapter 22

**A/N: Sorry it took so long for inspiration to kick in. This fanfic is not over yet, so stay tuned and I'll be back as soon as the new season kicks off :D**

 **Enjoy!**

Chapter 22 :

"Whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the process he does not become a monster. And if you gaze long enough into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you." Friedrich Nietzsche

I don't expect anybody to understand the reasons behind my decision, for most people, I'm the heartless woman who's just abandoned the man she loves and took their kid without even a warning. They believe I'm so weak that I simply gave up, when the truth is that my fight has just begun.

I'm Adalind Schade; I don't let down people I love; I fight for them

Maybe Nick doesn't understand it now, because I'm sure, he's still dealing with anger and loss, but leaving him was the only way I found to protect him from the evil that promised to annihilate him and my kids if I didn't comply with BC's plans for me.

The past days have been nothing but a continuity of malevolent intentions directed at me. Hard to have a free will when you're nothing but a puppet in the hands of your master. I am, once again a pawn on BC's chessboard, the role I was going to play in Sean's election as mayor was decided before Senator Nixon was even killed. Yeah, this is how evil Black Claw is. They were thinking ahead of all of us and just imagine what an asset a Hexembiest could be, in addition to appearing beside the mayor of Portland as the love of his life as Sean put it tonight. I think I want to laugh and cry all at once.

Oh, did I forget to tell you? Sean has just been elected mayor of Portland. Supriseeee!

This man will stop at nothing to get what he wants, they tell you that power and money are very appealing to both Hexenbiests and Zauberbiests, but I fought my battles a while ago and realized what was really important to me. If I could overcome that urge, so can Sean, except he's never loved anybody more than himself. Sacrifice is still a foreign term to him, when I had to embrace abnegation the first time I gave birth.

Diana! Being reunited with her is the only highlight of this sad story of my life, but my little girl has become a child I barely know. Sometimes, she's so scary that I wish she was born human, rather than a Hexenbiest. I know for a fact that those powers bring nothing but bad luck, especially when not tamed and my daughter is definitely not. She's capricious and greedy, which I totally understand given her age and all the years she's spent away from her parents, but I wish I was there to give her the right education. She's too young for so much power.

Aside from the problems I have with BC and Sean, my daughter is trying to control both our love lives her father and I. She's a little girl and there's nothing wrong in wanting to see your parents together, but it goes to a whole new level of creepiness when said child tries to control your mind and encourage you for a make out session with the father.

If kissing Sean hadn't felt awkward and wrong despite how much I thought I wanted to, we would never have stopped at just locking lips. This is when I understood that Diana was the one controlling our bodies and minds.

It's only when Sean starts to kiss my neck that I come back to my senses, no, this is not who I want to be with, this is not…Nick. Yes, I love Nick and nobody will ever replace him. This is the way it's going to be. Living under the same roof as Sean and playing house doesn't mean I'm going back to my old self and old crush, hell no, this was over a life ago and darn was it a good decision to make.

I slap Sean very hard on the face when he tries to bring me back to his chest

"What's the matter with you?" He shouts

It takes everything in me not to call him an idiot "Don't you see what's going on?"

"I thought I did" he gestures to the bed and that's it, I can't take it anymore

"You Moron, it's our daughter, she's the one doing this, not us" I spit

His brows furrow in confusion "What are you talking about? Diana?"

"Oh God! You really think that all of a sudden I decided you were the hottest guy on earth and I couldn't wait to take my clothes off and hop onto bed with you?" Geez, can't he see it? I've despised the guy for so long that he should have figured it out right away.

"Well!" he thinks about it for a second and his next words make my skin itch "I am the new mayor" he states in an as a matter of fact tone.

Remember how I told you about my bad taste in men before, well, here's a hell of an example of what I was talking about.

I roll my eyes and spit vehemently "I didn't vote for you"

That seems to spark indignation in him "You may not want to be here, but you are, you'd better get used to it, because this is a position you can't quit"

It wasn't very wise of me to treat Sean as my enemy, given my situation, but there's nothing I could do about it. None of this would have happened if he didn't agree to work with an evil organization such as BC and he dragged me along. I will never forgive him what's he's doing to me and my kids for as long as I'll live. But he'd better get used to rejection from me, because it will never be otherwise.

My heart already belongs to someone else and it's to protect him and my children that I accepted to play this sick game in the first place. I slap the door very hard behind him, then change in my night clothes before having a very serious talk with Diana. I'm glad Kelly is already asleep, that way I can take my time with my daughter.

Opening her bedroom door without any noise, I'm not surprised to find her sitting on her bed, eyes wide open.

"Why aren't you asleep?" I ask when actually I already know the answer

Her violet blue eyes stare back at me innocently "I don't know"

I switch on her bedside lamp and join her on the bed, but as soon as I sit, I feel something solid under the covers, standing up, I remove whatever is under and to my surprise I find two dolls, a male and a female and this is when it hits me. She used voodoo magic, but how did she learn to do that? I know for a fact, that at her age I knew nothing about mind control through dolls.

"Maybe this is why you're not asleep" I suggest in a soft voice because I know reproach won't convey the message I want to share

She doesn't reply, instead she asks me a question of her own "How come you and daddy don't like each other?"

I sigh "We haven't spent a lot of time together and…" I turn to face her "sometimes that makes people not know each other very well, but you can't push people together, especially not mommy and daddy. Understand?" I ask softly as I place the dolls on the night stand.

"I don't like Rachel" she refers to Sean's PR. I believe the two of them have an affair but I don't really give a damn. They can do whatever they want as long as they leave me alone.

"Why not?'

"Because she likes daddy" she answers simply as if that explains it all and it makes me smile. She's still an innocent child, despite her attempts at controlling people. Or so I want to believe?

I guess, sometimes, it's hard to face the truth when it comes to your own child

"This is not something you need to worry about" I start to get up "Now, it's been a long day and you need to get some sleep, ok?"

"Will you stay with me?" her puppy eyes are very difficult to resist so I settle back in bed and admire her angelic face when she sleeps. I've dreamed of this moment a million times, but I imagined different circumstances…other than being trapped in a prison like house, under the influence of a group of sick people, thriving power more than anything.

%%%

"You wanted to see me?" I ask Bonapart the next day as I appear in the living room. This man is so creepy that whenever I see him I want to run in the opposite direction.

"Yes" he gestures to the plush chair "Have a seat" despite my better judgment, I do as he asks. He scares me, I have no excuse for abiding by his every will. He's threatened openly to kill Nick and take my kids from me if I didn't follow his instructions.

He takes a deep breath, pretending his next words hurt him "Adalind, I know you're not in love with Sean"

"I'm doing the best I can" and that's the truth, because even being in the same room as him takes a huge effort, so believe me playing pretend in public is all I can do. Take it or leave it!

"I don't believe you are"

Bile rises to my throat "Well, you're not a woman"

"I'm not asking you to be in love" his tone is so condescending that I want to spit on his face and turn on my heels, instead I play it civilized and ask him what he expects of me.

"I want you to think about the children, of how important their future is" in case you haven't understood his words my friends, that's a threat. He's picked the one thing I can't debate, the one weakness I can't overcome and thrown it on my face.

"If I wasn't thinking about what's best for my children, I wouldn't be here" losing my temper in front of such a dangerous man is a bad idea, but it's easier said than done, trust me.

Never losing an ounce of his composure, Bonapart nods "I know that"

Realizing confrontation is a mistake and won't help my case, I decide for a softer tone "Sean is…not my type and this unfortunately is not going to change"

He chuckles, then to my surprise, he takes both my hands in his "Adalind!" for some reason, the way he speaks to me feels like a parent scolding a child "You need to know something about me" he stares me straight in the eyes "I'm not like Sean, there's more to me than that" somehow, his words seem to mean so much more, his grip starts to hurt and I'm unable to free my hands.

"We need to understand each other on a deeper level" he says as soon as he woges into a full force Zauberbiest. His hands look like they're melting into mine and it hurts terribly "And if you're going to be stubborn about it, then you should look like what you are" he continues, dragging my eyes to my arms that, to my horror, are turning in stone, in less than few seconds my whole body turns into solid stone. I can't move, speak or even breathe. It's so painful that death seems like a better alternative at the moment.

"Now, is this really how you want your children to see you?"

My eyes drop to the mirrored table and I'm horrified to see my rock grey face

"Sometimes, a point has to be made" Bonapart adds once he releases me "But, we're not asking you this for nothing" he opens his palm and I see a ring

"What's that?" horror crawls on my skin

"A wedding ring" well, duh "you're a princess and Sean will be your prince" the ring travels to my ring finger with the strength of his will "People will love a fairytale"

I know there's no point in arguing despite the repulsion I'm feeling at the moment

"It's beautiful" he smiles happily "Oh, one more thing, do not take this ring off, because it would be extremely painful…for your children"

I swallow my agony, my children are my everything and they're worth any sacrifice "It's very nice" I fight the tears pooling in my eyes "Thank you"

When you think that you've already seen the worst happen in your life, there's always something or someone to prove you wrong. My daughter walks into my bedroom, while I'm trying desperately to sleep and asks me to follow her because she wants to show me something.

Suddenly I'm transported to Rachel's bedroom and red bedsheets are wrapped around her body and face. She's struggling to breathe. A shiver travels down my body.

"Diana! What are you doing? Stop it" I order, I beg, I demand but in vain because she won't stop until Rachel suffocates and when she's satisfied, she turns to me and declares "She won't take daddy anymore"

I snap my eyes open, my throat is burning. It was just a dream, a very bad dream. If so, why do I feel like it happened for real?

My daughter is turning into an uncontrollable killing machine and I'm trapped here because I want to protect the people I love. I'm scared and hurting, I miss Nick, my friend, my lover. I grab my phone and dial a number I've been dying to reach for a while.

"Adalind!"

"Wu?" why is he answering Nick's phone? It definitely smells fishy. All my instincts go on high alert "Where's Nick?" I ask

"He's been arrested" he whispers "He and Renard got into it" but that's not the end of my surprise "Renard killed Meisner" my head spins, I think I'm going to throw up. He killed Meisner! The man who helped save our daughter, the man who risked his life to protect me. The man who's been nothing but good to us. How could he?

He's lost all his humanity. This man has become a monster

When Wu's about to hang up, I beg him to deliver a message to Nick "Can you just tell him that I'm sorry, Kelly's good and that…I love him" my voice cracks as I say those words. God, I miss him and being away from him is making me insane "and if there's any…" the door opens and I recognize Sean's shape at the entrance of my bedroom.

I hide quickly the phone and greet him, but he's highly suspicious. I notice bruises and blood on his face. He looks completely disheveled.

"You're still awake?" he asks

"Difficult to sleep with everything going on downstairs" I lie "What happened to your face?" I try to deviate the conversation away from me

"Rough night at the precint" it must be what Wu told me about, Sean walks farther in the bedroom and I'm scared of what he's about to do or say.

"Rachel is dead" he shrugs

My heart skips a beat "Dead!" I don't want to believe it, because it would mean that Diana killed her. My daughter….a little girl killed her…my blood turns ice cold in my veins.

"Yeah, she died strangled in her own bed. How long has our daughter been asleep?" there's unmistakable venom in his voice

"A couple hours, why?" I'm scared of what he might do to her

"We need to talk to her"

"About what?"

"About killing people" he states, confirming my worst fears "Did you encourage her?" has this man gone completely nuts? Wait, that happened a while ago

I roll my eyes "To kill your girlfriend! Yeah Sean, I told my daughter to murder her daddy's mistress" sarcasm, my best weapon when I'm defenseless "What kind of mother do you think I am?"

"As she wants us together she might have perceived Rachel as a threat" he shrugs

"No, that's you're doing, not mine" I point to my chest and that's when he notices the ring on my finger

"Who gave you that?" he asks angrily

I want to laugh "Oh, you don't know! You proposed, we're getting married"

He walks to me "When has that happened?"

"I don't know, you'll have to ask Bonapart; he's the wedding planner"

Sean shrugs out of his jacket "Well then I'm staying here the night, I don't want Bonapart to think we're not taking this seriously"

This man is outrageous, I swear I'm going to strangle him with my bare hands

Seeing my indignation, Sean lifts his hands to stop me from hurting him "Relax! I'll sleep over there" he walks toward the couch "I've had enough tragedy for one night"

Sleeping is gone for the night as I lay back in bed. This sure will be a long night, but to my stupor, not the end of it. A striking pain runs through me. I hold my rib tightly and try to stop the stabbing pain, in vain. Oh my God, something is happening to Eve. We've been sort of connected since she turned into a Hexenbiest, I have no idea how it works but we seem to sense each other's distress "Something's not right?"

"What? With you?" Sean asks

"No" I shake my head, struggling to breathe "Eve" suddenly her presence starts to fade and I realize what really is going on "I think she's dying"

Sean stands up "How do you know?"

"I don't really know" I admit sincerely "I just feel it"

We hear a car stop by the house and the main door opens, Sean tells me it's Bonapart, so we both run downstairs to see what's going on. To my horror, he walks directly to me "Where's Burkhardt?" I know exactly what he wants and I'm not giving it to him

"How would I know where he is?" I take a step back until I'm trapped between him and the wall

"Tell me where he lives?" he demands but I ignore his order "You think this is a game?" he yells, losing his temper for the first time since I met him, he lifts his hand in the air and in a split second I'm suffocating, like someone is grabbing my throat and pressing against it to prevent the air from going in "Tell me where he lives"

I try to get away from him, I feel blood vessels about to explode in my eyes, my soul fighting to leave my body, death embracing slowly my skin. I think this is, this is how I'll die. It's over.

Sean stands before me "Tell him…Tell him" he begs "Bonapart we need her"

My head is spinning and I have no power to fight anymore

"Tell me where he lives" Bonapart asks again and this time I give him the answer he wants

Before leaving, he stares at Sean and mutters "He will die tonight"

Struggling to breathe again, I feel a rush of panic wash over me as Bonapart's words register in my mind. Because of me, Nick is going to die. Everything I did to protect him has gone to dust in a split second. My heart breaks in a million pieces, if something happens to him then I don't thing I can survive. I run to my daughter's bedroom and for the first time, I do something I never believed myself capable of; I ask my daughter for help.

"I need you to get a message to Kellly's daddy, Nick…his mommy helped raise you when you were a little girl, remember?" I ask hopefully and to my relief she nods "Well he needs our help now"

"Is he in trouble?" she wonders

I nod "Yes, that's why I need you to get him a message, but it has to be a secret ok? Nobody can know what we did"

"Ok" she agrees

"Alright, tell him I'm sorry and that mommy's bad friend made her tell him where Nick lives, ok?"

Diana nods and does as I ask, once she's back from her trance, I hug her tightly and thank her. Staring at my neck, she frowns "Mommy, what happened to your neck"

There must be bruises I wasn't aware of "Someone got angry with me"

"He hurt you" she states

I sigh "Yes, he did" this really is something I didn't want her to see

"Was it daddy?"

"No, no, of course not"

But to my discomfort, Diana won't stop asking until I tell her "It was a friend of Daddy's, but don't worry about that, ok? Let's get you back to bed, come-on"

With my aching heart, I walk my daughter to her bedroom, praying all the while for Nick's safety. I tuck Diana under the covers and wait patiently until sleep takes over. Then I can finally hide in the confines of my way too familiar agony. I run to my baby's crib and hold a crying Kelly tightly in my arms, bringing his cheek against mine as our tears mingle and our sobs mix in synchrony.

My son might have just lost his father and I might just have lost the love of my life. The possibility hurts like hell. I don't think anybody could ever understand my feelings for Nick for they are stronger than what I ever felt before and also the purest love I've ever known. He mended my heart and purified my soul and for this I'll be eternally grateful.

My love where are you? I wonder with a sob

No Nick, I haven't given up. My fight has just begun


	23. Chapter 23

**A/N: Well, well, that was a hell of a comeback, wasn't it? *Sigh* those kisses made me lovesick. Enjoy**

Chapter 23:

Yearning, heartache, dread, hopelessness…those are the different emotions I experienced since my forced separation from Nick. With every tick of the clock, every new decision made on my behalf, every scheme involving me without my consent, my heartbreak intensifies. And it always goes back to that same question; will it ever end?

However, tonight ranks in a whole new level of horror. I've just given away Nick's location to the monsters that persecute him. I tried not to. I resisted until my soul started to rip my skin to break free and even then, I wasn't thinking of my own life, but the outcome of my children if I wasn't there to protect them.

Now, here I am, holding a crying baby Kelly in my arms, trying desperately to calm his worries and mine. I balance my son soothingly in my arms, reassuring him with words I don't believe myself.

"Daddy's going to be alright" I repeat the same sentence so many times, praying that with the strength of my will, I might influence the universe "It's okay"

I check the clock for the umpteenth time tonight, only to realize that the hand has barely moved. Is he going to be alright? What if something bad happened to him, tonight? All because I gave away his address. My heart leaps and my legs are made of rubber; making it impossible to stand. I place delicately Kelly in his crib, whispering one more time my new mantra _Daddy's going to be okay._

I jolt to the clicking sound of the door closing. On wobbly legs and a racing heart, I follow the noise, only to come to a halt when I see the intruder. The walls of the enormous suite are suddenly closing in. I never thought of myself as claustrophobic, but now I'm starting to feel like one. Even the floor beneath my feet is somewhat shaking.

If Sean is here, it can only mean one thing

Taking a huge gulp of oxygen, I try to ignore my shattering teeth and wipe my sweating hands on my robe discreetly, before voicing out loud my biggest fear "Is nick dead?" the question is barely audible as Sean stalks in, like he owns the place…well, technically he does, but that's my room.

The new mayor doesn't wait to reply with an angry "No" causing me to release the breath I had no idea I was holding. He walks to the window for a quick check, as if expecting to see someone.

Nick being alive doesn't mean he's fine, I follow Sean to the window "Is he okay?"

"He's alive" He hisses angrily with his back to me

Tonight was supposed to be retribution day. Two clans in a battle. Two kings but one kingdom. A war between darkness and light…This is what it's been always about.

Only one of them was getting alive out of it and despite Sean being the father of my Diana, I don't feel any sympathy or relief upon seeing him standing here before me. He chose his side, crossing all the boundaries between wrong and right and renouncing to his humanity along the way.

"Well, then how are you here?" I insist "What are you doing so alive?"

He turns so fast, I barely register the movement "Thanks for your concern" he scowls with visible disgust.

Waves of anger hit me at his audacity. What did he seriously expect? That I welcome him with open arms and a happy smile? If so, he's clearly delusional.

"You and Bonaparte went to kill Nick, why should I be concerned about you?"

My last comment seems to trigger something within Sean, he takes long strides toward me and in a split second I think he's going to hit me, but he stops barely an inch from my face and through gritted teeth delivers the news he's been withholding since he got back "Bonaparte is dead"

It's only now that I notice the bruises on his face. It's like a painting portrait gone wrong with too much blue and red.

I don't know whether to be in shock or celebrate. Bonaparte is dead!

"What?"

Clearly out of breath and patience, Sean nods his head "Yeah, you must be relieved"

I ignore his comment as I try to process this information and what it really implies "Nick killed him?"

He shakes his head "No, he had nothing to do with that"

I'm annoyed and irritated at his evasive replies "Then who did?"

The crease between his eyebrows deepens as he scrutinizes my face, looking more troubled that I ever saw him "I'm not entirely sure" he looks and sounds like a lunatic. He is not making any sense

"You were there, how did you not see who killed him?"

He inhales deeply "I saw it" the haunted expression on his face is unmistakable. Something big happened tonight in relation with Bonaparte's death, but Sean refuses to tell what it is.

I grow impatient with every passing minute "You're not making any sense"

He immediately loses whatever restraint he's mustered so far. He stalks away from me; away from reality, for whatever is tormenting him "Because none of this is making any sense" he yells, but I refuse to let it go

"Then who killed him?"

And that's when he drops the last ounce of control he has "I killed him"

The revelation draws a whirlwind inside my head. How is that even possible? Why would he kill Bonaparte? Has he possibly come to his senses and realized what a terrible mistake it is to follow BC? But it takes one look at his face to understand that he doesn't know the answers himself.

He takes a step back, holding his hands in the air, desperate to leave as much space between us as possible "Maybe" he adds in a softer tone, not meeting my eyes "I'm not sure"

"How can you not be sure about something like that" my voice rises

His haunted expression is back, he looks like he's reconstituting the scene, remembering every second, in desperate need of understanding "I stabbed him" he whispers more to himself. It's like he's saying those things to himself, not me "But, I didn't realize what I'd done until I saw that…" he takes a deep breath, his pupils are dilated and his whole body is shaking "bloody sword in my hands"

He gives me no time to analyze what he has just confessed as to my utter stupor he turns his accusatory eyes on me "But you already know about that, don't you?"

I'm baffled by his boldness. How dare he accuse me of having previous knowledge of that? Or worse, orchestrating the whole thing? I turn my full attention on Sean and make it clear I had nothing to do with this.

"Do you thing I'd risk that knowing what he could do to my children?" indignation curses through my veins as I look into his glassy eyes. I see the exact moment my comment sinks in and the wheels in his head start turning in another direction.

"Has Diana been asleep all night?"

Despite my anger, I see clear where he's going with this statement. I must admit, my mind was drifting along the same lines, before I dismissed it. My body goes on alert immediately. I can't help but doubt my own daughter. I've seen first hand what she's capable of when she believes she's protecting her loved ones. Although it comes from a good place, it remains nonetheless wrong, however, the mother in me won't address the elephant in the room, instead I defend her as best I can "Are you going to blame her for that, too?"

He stares at me with palpable irritation "Well, somebody made me kill Bonaparte, just like somebody killed Rachel. Who has that kind of power?" memories of Rachel's death flash in my mind. The piece of velvet red fabric strangling her and my daughter promising nobody would ever come in the way between her parents. Ice cold sweat drips from my forehead.

Hesitantly, I decide to share something with Sean, in an attempt to explain my daughter's motivation, if (and I still give her the benefit of the doubt) she did kill Bonaparte. The mere possibility of her doing such a thing, makes the hair on the back of my neck stand "Diana…" I sigh, mustering the courage to finish my sentence "saw the bruises on my neck and asked me if you had done it"

What seems like an eternity later, Sean finally asks "And what did you tell her?"

I swallow hard as I continue "I said No, one of your friends did it and that she shouldn't worry about it"

He breathes in and breathes out slowly in an attempt to control his anger, then puts his legs in motion, I know exactly where he's going, but I can't help myself when I ask "What are you doing?"

"I'm not going to let Diana control our lives"

Fear crawls on my skin like million little ants eating at it "If Diana killed Bonaparte, I'd go a little easy on the discipline" I hurry after him

Sean stops on his tracks and sighs deeply, clearly seeing my point even though he doesn't agree, which encourages me to carry on "Bonaparte brought this on himself" yes, I'm happy this evil man is dead, now that I can finally think about it "He would have killed me…maybe Diana just wanted her daddy to be a hero and save mommy"

Sean considers for a moment, then comes back inside and closes the door "She got her wish" his demeanor changed dramatically in a split second, he went from crazy lunatic, to composed and calm.

"We better be careful what she wishes for"

"Black Claw is going to find out about Bonaparte…if they haven't already" Sean starts stressing again over what's the apocalypse to come "And they're going to go after whoever did it"

"I assume you're not gonna confess" I say drily

Sean seems to recover completely from tonight's events as he walks into the closet and collects a shirt and a pair of trousers "No" he emerges from it "Somebody is"

"Who?" I ask skeptically

He stops beside me, eyes on the floor, before lifting them once again to my face, my heart comes to a halt as he spits his next words "You should have never fallen in love with Burkhardt" he pauses for his threat to make its full impact "now, you're gonna regret it"

My first instinct, when I see his car leave the pavement, is to slip into my daughter's room. I see the doll on her bed and there's no doubt in my broken heart that she's the one behind Bonaparte's death. Tears sting in the back of my eyes when I get closer and notice the sword-like toy next to the doll.

"Mommy" my daughter's voice makes me jump.

I collect quickly my composure and go sit beside her on the bed "I'm sorry to wake you, sweetie" I try to breathe even, as I consider the implications of her doing. My little girl just killed a top BC management man and they'll probably come after her, but that's not our only issue. She's clearly using her powers the wrong way, although she thinks she's doing it to protect her loved ones.

"What's wrong?" she probably noticed my blanching face

I decide to tread cautiously with her "Were you playing with your dolls again tonight?"

She takes a second before responding "Uh-humm I couldn't sleep"

"Why not?" I inch closer, concern lacing my voice

She looks so pretty, so pure and so young "Because of that man who hurt your neck…he was mean and I didn't want him to ever hurt you again, mommy" in that moment, I realize that no matter how sick and twisted the situation is, any kid with powers like hers in her position would probably have done the same to protect their mom from someone who tried to hurt them. Sadly, no matter how noble her motivations are, the outcome is still horrendous.

I hold her in my arms and try to help sleep, while the rest of my mind is on the break of a mental break down.

As soon as Diana drifts off to sleep, I hurry to my bedroom and do the one thing I've been dying to do since Sean came back; I call Nick. My heart is beating fast as the phone rings and all oxygen leaves my lungs the moment I hear him say my name on the other end of the line. His voice is breathy, tired, but my name coming from his lips sounds like heaven "Adalind"

"I'm so happy to hear your voice, are you all right?" I manage to say, eager to make sure he's okay

"Yeah, are you?"

"Renard was here, he told me what happened, he said Bonaparte is dead. Is that true?" I speak so fast, I'm surprised he's following through

He sighs "Yeah, but I didn't kill him"

"I know, Renard said he did"

"Where is he now?"

"I don't know he left" it feels like we're running out of time and with every minute spent away from him, my new found claustrophobia seem to worsen "I really need to see you, so does Kelly" I don't care how desperate I sound, I miss him, like my lungs miss oxygen, I've become a junkie, waiting for next refill of Nick Burkhardt, he's become my drug and my oxygen "But, I can't leave the house…not with the children here. Can you come over? The guards who used to be here are gone…Nick, please, I need you" I'm scared he might say No. He's probably angry with me and I wouldn't be surprised if he hated me…God, I don't like myself much either right now. The way he sees it is I took our son away from him, helped our enemy become even more powerful and given away his location to the very men who wanted him dead, so frankly, I don't think I am on his list of people he wants to meet, which is why his "I'll be there as soon as I can" takes me completely by surprise.

What seems like forever later, I hear the click of the main door. Without thinking twice, I run downstairs, eager to see him. Just like Christmas morning, when you run to rip open you presents under the Christmas tree. Only this time, it's ten times more intense. I've been dying to see him for so long that I'm afraid it's just a dream. That he's simply the creation of my own imagination. He sees me and I see him. Our yes lock and his pace is just as fast as mine, he meets me half way and our lips connect in a thunderstorm kiss, it's frantic, hungry, passionate, achy and desperate. We pour all our feeling in that one kiss. Finally, I can breathe again. My oxygen is back. My lungs are filled, but I know I'm going to need more and soon. I know now, that my life is beside Nick and not away from him. He was my destiny all along, but I needed to fight my battles first before opening my eyes.

We don't rejoice too much in our reunion. Time is our enemy

"Thank God, you're alive" I manage to say when we break our kiss to take some air "This all has been awful"

Nick's eyes scrutinize me, searching for every detail of what I've been through when we were apart, as if I was the one on war tonight and not him. I see the exact moment his eyes land on my neck. His whole body tenses and his eyes go from hungry and lust filled to glassy and murderous "Did Renard did this to you" He touches lightly his fingers on the bruises on my neck and I shiver.

"No" I shake my head, not wanting to talk about it "Bonaprte" I muster more courage and confess my doing "Nick, I'm the one who told him where you live, he would have killed me and our son" tears burn my eyes while his hand is stroking delicately and deliciously my bruised neck. He stares at me with so much affection that makes my stomach flutters.

"I know, you didn't have a choice" he pauses a second "Where's Kelly?"

"In my room"

His whole face lights up the moment he sets eyes on our son, it's like nothing else exists. Like he has no care in the world except for the little angel. He brings him to his chest and holds him tightly.

"Has he been ok?"

"Yeah, but I know he misses you" I lift my left hand to caress our baby in his father's arms and that's when Nick notices the ring on my finger. His face goes livid and his eyes wide

"What is that?" he asks out of breath

Bile rises to my throat as I proceed to tell him the story "An engagement ring for me and Renard. Bonaparte put it there…and not normally" terror curses through my body as I recall that moment "He said that if I ever took it off, he would cause great pain to my children" Nick looks away from my face, probably too angry to cope with it, he kisses Kelly on the forehead as I carry on "I hate it, but I'm afraid to take it off without knowing how to break the spell" our eyes meet again "Even if he's dead it could still survive"

"We'll find a way to break it" he states with determination in his beautiful green eyes that swallow all my pain and sorrow. Whenever I look into them, I want to let myself drown even more

"I need to be with you" I confess

He sighs, then puts Kelly back in his crib "And what about Diana?" his eyes are back on me "She's with you now"

"I don't know" I take a few steps away from him, frustrated with my current situation "I know she wants me and her dad to be together, but I'm afraid of what she might do" I voice out my fears "You don't know how powerful she is…but I hate him, I hate all of this…I've got to get out of here"

Sensing my freaking out, Nick holds both my shoulders "You can't leave yet…not until I deal with Renard" his hands travel from my shoulders to my upper arms, desperation seizes my body. Being here, away from him, is like being imprisoned in a windowless, lifeless place, my throat is sore as I blurt out my next words "I don't know how much longer I can do this"

Nick holds me in a tight embrace but his ringing phone puts an end to our sweet moment

"It's Hank"

" _Renard wants you dead, we just got back to the precinct, he's got an APB out on you_ _with a shoot-to-kill order, he's blaming what happened at north precinct on you, among other things, he wants to take you down with the legitimacy of the city behind him, you need to find a place to lay low, till we can figure this out"_

If I thought we had seen it all, I was dramatically wrong. My legs start shaking immediately. The whole city is going after my love. There's no way we're escaping this. The rest of the conversation is a blur. Nick's eyes don't leave my face for a second as he wraps things up with Hank.

I close my hands in fits as I feel my protective instinct make its way. Nobody hurts the people I love "If he hurts you, I will kill him" I say through gritted teeth.

Nick speaks so calmly, that I feel like a little girl he's explaining things to "We can't take any chances" his eyes hold me captive, they are so heavy with emotions, with affection, with need that for a second I let myself relinquish in the possibility that they are the reflection of what my own eyes transmit "But if I don't come back, feel free" the mere possibility of losing him makes my head spin

"Where are you going to go?" but before he answers, I remind myself that it's best I don't know "No, no no no, don't tell me" I put a hand behind his head and bring his mouth to mine while my other hand rests of his chest. Nick immediately grabs my head and kisses me fiercely. Our tongues meet and electricity shakes my body, I can feel how much he wants me and I want him just as much. I'm drunk in his lips, his embrace, his touch, his smell.

I love this man more than humanly possible

And then he's gone and I have no idea when I'll see him again


	24. Chapter 24

**A/N: I'm back. I apologize for the long(est) wait. Hope you'll enjoy this new chapter**

Chapter 24 : "Man is not what he thinks he is, he is what he hides"

A call is all it took to shake my already torn apart world "Would you accept a call from Sean Renard?" what could I possibly say? No? well, maybe… but there was too much at stake. He was a threat to my dearest ones and I wasn't risking their lives especially since they're already hanging by a string "I guess" I replied weakly

"Adalind" came his breathy voice, he seemed shaken, on edge

"What's going on?" I asked although I didn't care whatever happened to him

He hesitated briefly "I've been arrested for murder"

What kind of game is he playing now? Well, let's see where he's going with this "Really?" I purred sarcastically "Who'd you kill?"

"I didn't kill anybody" of course, lucky he can't see me roll my eyes right now

"Well then, who do they think you killed" I was really interested in hearing his story, taking this call proved highly entertaining, however, I was not the least prepared to the bomb he was about to drop on my head "Rachel Wood" a name I thought I'd never hear again. A name that would bring shivers to my spine, although the reason to my dread is not her in person, but the circumstances of her…death "Oh"

"Yeah, so I need you to listen to me closely" I swallowed hard, getting ready for his next words "Get somebody to watch the kids and get down here, right away"

Was he kidding me? Why would I ever do that? "Why?"

"Because you're going to get me out of here" he stated it like it was the most natural thing to do for me. I was tempted to laugh at the irony given that I wished nothing more than for him to rot in a cell, so the reason I accepted is completely beyond me, or is it? He's still the father of my Diana and also a threat to my family who'd be able to cause collateral damage, even when locked in the confines of hell.

After ruminating my conversation with Sean, I finally decide to get dressed and ready, next thing I do is call the only person I ever considered a friend…Rosalee "Hey, it's Adalind, can I ask you a favor" I ask immediately.

"Yeah, sure" she replies hesitantly, I can imagine he brows furrowed in confusion as to why I would call a favor

Rosalee is the only person I trust with my children, ironic, huh! Given how a few years ago I despised her for helping kidnap Diana. Well, if one thing I learned during the past few months, it's that those who you thought bad might be the ones to help you when you most need it "Can I bring the kids by the shop for a couple of hours?" when there was no answer, I added hastily "there is something I have to do and I don't trust my kids with anybody else…Except for Nick and I don't know where he is" there starts the rambling, a clear indication of my stress "and I'm just too afraid to contact him"

"Yes, bring them over" I could hear the smile in her voice and it helped ease the craze of my beating heart

"Thank you, we'll be there soon"

After getting the kids ready and explaining why I had to leave them with "Uncle Monroe" and "Aunt Rosalee", mom's friends, we finally made it to the spice shop. I was delighted to see Rose again, it had been so long since we last met.

"Thanks so much for helping us out" I expressed my gratitude the moment we stepped in

"Of course" Rosalee gave the three of us a warm smile that confirmed once again I made the right choice by leaving the kids with her, although I could only imagine her and Monroe's apprehension to stay alone with Diana, heck, even I was scared of my daughter sometimes…She's too young for such great powers "Hi, Diana" Rosalee turned her attention on my daughter, shaking her hand "I'm glad we finally get a chance to meet" she stood again "I'm Rosalee and this is Monroe" she said reaching her husband's arm with affection.

"I know" Diana smiled a big toothy smile that reassured me "I saw both of you with Kelly's daddy" referring to when I asked her to deliver a message to Nick through a sort of teleportation.

"That's right, that was pretty impressive what you did, just appearing like that out of the blue" Despite his smile, Monroe was stiff and I resisted a wince, noting the unsaid in his sentence…His own fear.

"Why?" Diana asked good naturedly, as if her appearing in the middle of nowhere was the most natural thing in the world, her question took Monroe and Rosalee by surprise and sent them off balance.

"Oh, um" Monroe was at loss "Just 'cause most people can't really do this sort of thing"

Diana simply walked away, her attention now fully on the spices and ingredients that lined the shop shelves, while Monroe shut his eyes tightly, probably wondering how he's about to spend the longest two hours of his life with my daughter, me on the other hand was trying hard not to laugh at his mortified expression.

"What is all this stuff" my little hexenbiest asked, eyes in awe

"Just a bunch of herbs and spices" Rosalee offered kindly

I really was enjoying this exchange, but I was running out of time, so I asked Rose if I could place my Kelly in the back room while he was still asleep. Rose helped me find a cozy spot for my son, leaving an utterly afraid Monroe behind.

"Do you want to see some of the herbs and spices?" I heard him ask my little girl

"Thank you so much for doing this" I breathed the moment Rose and I were left alone in the back shop

Her eyes stayed on Kelly, as she rocked his chair "I can't imagine what you're going through considering what's going on"

Her words warmed my heart. I was still not completely accustomed to acts of sympathy and kindness, but that's Rosalee, she has the biggest heart known of.

I sighed in frustration "Sean's been arrested" I couldn't believe how relieved I was to be able to confide in a friend again

"What?"

Her surprise was palpable "Yeah, for murder"

"I…I'm surprised" she stuttered on the words "Not that he murdered somebody, but that he was arrested for it"

Yeah, just my thoughts, I cringed internally

"Was it Bonapart?"

I shook my head "No, Rachel Wood"

Her face blanched "He killed his own mistress?"

Ergg…I hated not being able to tell her the truth, but I had to protect my daughter and lying to my friend was out of the question, so I went with the safest answer "It's complicated, but he wants _me_ to get him out of it"

"How?"

I sighed heavily "I don't know, but I'll be back as soon as I can"

"Never thought I'd see this" I said honestly the moment my eyes landed on Sean, seating in an interrogation room, handcuffed and completely disheveled. Well, I didn't feel sorry for him, maybe he'll finally pay for the wrongs he made.

"Well, enjoy it while you can" he cringed as I sat across from him

Not beating around the bush, I cut straight to the point "What do you want from me?"

"A little help"

"And what kind of help would that be?"

He looked away from me "Well, ironically, I don't have an alibi for the night Rachel was killed"

I raised an eyebrow "Where were you?"

He looked at me pointedly "I was killing Bonapart"

Hearing the name of that tyrant made the hair on the back of my neck stand, I managed a smirk though "Oh, well, that is awkward"

But, Sean used the one weakness I had, my children "We both know who killed her"

The mere mention of the incident made me jump out of my skin "What do you want me to do? Turn in our daughter so you can get out of this?"

"No, you will get me out of this"

"How?" I rolled my eyes at him. I didn't want to help him but I was left no choice

"We were together all night, I never left the house"

I had to shut my eyes for a moment to gather my senses "You expect me to be your alibi for a murder you didn't commit, because you were actually murdering the person who was your alibi" Well, let me laugh at this for a second

He had the nerve to nod "Basically, yeah" he raised an eyebrow looking at me as if I was somewhat too stupid to comprehend what he was saying "Shouldn't be too hard"

It took all my will power not to punch his smug expression off his face

"Unless I perjure myself and I end up going to jail" is this man insane? Completely rhetorical question, of cause he is "Let me tell you something, I have two kids to take care of"

"I'm not going to jail for a murder I did not commit" he spat vehemently

"Why not?" I lost all my temper "You're not going to jail for the one you did commit"

He inched closer, leaving a barely there space between us and whispered with unmistakable threat in his voice "You owe me"

"I owe my children" I looked him straight in the eyes "And if I have to chose between me going to jail and you going to jail," I paused to let my words sink in his miserable little brain "Good luck with the grand jury" I winked and left the room before I murdered someone myself.

I was still in the precinct when an unknown number called my cell phone "Hello?"

A deep velvety voice I missed more than anything replied "Hey, it's me"

I managed to keep my cool, not wanting any more attention than needed given where I was at the moment and how the man on the other line was wanted "Ok, where are you?" then realized my mistake the moment I asked "Wait, don't tell me" I don't want anybody squeezing the words out of my mouth if shit went down

"I need your help with something, where are you?"

"Actually, I'm in your precinct"

He sighed "Can you talk?"

"I think so"

I heard a weird background noise, like a door opening or a window "I need to make a deal with somebody I don't trust" he started

Oh, that was familiar "Oh, you need a trust me knot, it's not a –not not-" I explained to avoid any confusion "It's a knot with a K like the one you tie with a rope"

"And how does that work?" he was breathing fast, probably in motion

"It's pretty simple actually" I sighed "Whoever signs the trust me knot has to do it with what they promise or they choke to death like a hangman's knot around their neck…I can do one for you"

"Can you do it now?"

I thought about it for a second, thinking of what I might need "Um, yeah, let me grab a couple of things and… where should I meet you?"

And the next thing he said blew my mind and sent my emotions in a whirlwind "Where you first told me you loved me"

Images of my confession of love flooded my mind, engaging my heart in a race and my limbs going weak. _Where you first told me you loved me_ , the words like liquid honey dripping from his mouth and making their way to my ears.

"Ok" is all I managed to say as my brain was too busy focusing on the fact that I was about to meet the love of my life again and of all memories we shared together in that particular location, he chose the one closest to my heart.

My heart was about to explode as I made my way inside the empty loft, walking as slowly as possible toward the bedroom; the place where I told Nick I loved him for the first time. The room seemed empty and I felt disappointed for a fraction of a second. Didn't he remember that this was the place where I first said those three words to him?

A small tap on my shoulder and his breath on my ear proved me wrong? "Adalind" my name was feathery against the sensitive skin between my ear and my neck. I closed my eyes, exhilarated in the exquisiteness of the moment "Don't you want to turn around?" he chuckled, his voice barely audible

I let my head fall back against his chest "Give me a second" or eternity, for I don't want this moment to ever end, I want to never leave this place…this man…this calmness again.

"Take your time" he buried his nose in my hair then brushed his lips against my neck

"Ok, that's it" I turned around and grabbed his face, giving in to my desire and engaging in a fierce kiss that made Nick stumble back before he regained his balance and responded with equal hunger "Gosh, I miss you so much" I muttered between kisses. Nick was tugging at my jacket as I let myself be pushed on the bed "We don't have much time before they get here" he murmured against my throat, then sucked on my skin, enjoying the vibration of my moan against his lips.

His palm traveled under my shirt, leaving goose bumps behind "Kelly?"

"With Monroe and Rosalee" my voice was breathy and unrecognizable to my own ears

Nick's phone vibrated, making us both groan "I have to take this" he looked at me apologetically and straightened. After glancing at the screen, he rubbed his face in frustration "They'll be here in five minutes"

"They?"

"Hank, Wu and Sean" then he told me how he needed me to be Sean's alibi for the night Rachel was killed, as a way to bargain with Sean "Are you ok with the plan?" he asked as he finished "I'm not forcing you to do anything you don't want" he added with so much affection in his eyes. I reached for his arm and stroked it "I'll do it…for you"

He planted a kiss on my lips and left reluctantly "I'll freshen up before they get here" with that he walked to the bathroom.

I remained on the bed a few more seconds to gather my thoughts, then I heard the elevator and male voices. That's when I got to my feet and arranged my appearance.

"…your fingerprints were at her place and you have no alibi for that night" I heard Wu say, only for Nick to interject "He has an alibi…me…I know where he was and what he was doing…But if I testify to say you killed Bonapart at the time, that might complicate both of our lives even more"

"We're here to help you" Hank directed his gaze at Sean

"How do you plan to do that?" Sean asked

"You drop all the charges against me" Nick stated while Hank added "and reinstate him in the department"

"And we give you an alibi that will work for the night Rcahel was killed" Wu chirped in

"Adalind" Nick said when Sean wanted more details

"Already tried, she turned me down"

Nick's voice seemed way too happy when he said "She didn't turn me down" I had to fight a mile when I realized he sounded like he was showing him on which side my heart lied.

"I'm not dropping the charges against you until I'm cleared by the grand jury" Sean declared

"And Adalind won't be testifying until we have a guarantee that you will drop the charges against me" Nick informed him

"So how do we get around this mutual little distrust of ours?"

This is when I decided to intervene, rope in hand, I walked in on them "A trust me knot"

"You really get around, don't you?" Sean looked at me with distaste, but I didn't give a damn as I walked closer

"Take these cuffs off" I instructed the guys "He's going to need his hands for this" I stared pointedly at Sean "You know how this works?" asking was just a formality, of course he did

"Sort of"

I gave one end of the rope to Nick and the other to Sean who seemed to hesitate "Take it" I ordered

I looked at both of them as I stated "This" I held the rope in the middle "Is a blood oath, whoever breaks it first will die" I glanced at Sean, making sure he understood the implication in case he had plans of his own

Staring at Nick I continued "You, Nick Burkhardt agree that I will testify at the grand jury on Sean Renard's behalf" then turned to Sean "And you, Sean Renard agree that once my testimony is given, you will drop all charges against Sean Burkhardt and reinstate him"

Both men agreed, then I woged before I bit my hand and let blood drops land on the rope. Once the rope turned red, I took it back and recited and incantation.

"If the trust is broken" I translated what I just said "The knot will kill" the rope formed a knot than had Wu exclaim in surprise "Don't want to be breaking that"

Nobody wants to…that is, if they are smart enough

Once back to the spice shop and making sure the kids were fine, Monroe told me I could find Rosalee and the girls in the basement. I wasn't sure how I'd feel running again into Juliet/Eve. I filled in the girls on what happened at the loft, then realized they were working on a very old piece of fabric.

"It's an ancient cloth that has some writing on it and we're trying to read it" Rosalee explained

"Without destroying it" Juliet added

Rose nodded in agreement "We used a spectral imaging machine but we can only make out a few letters"

Trubel seemed deep in thought "One of the words is miracle and the other is Dangerous or Perilous"

"What are you using" I asked curiously

"Since it's so old, we started with a mix of Phenolphlatein and red cabbage water"

Eve was working on the cloth "if the ink is ammonium based…"

"It will turn pink and become more legible" I finished for her

"That's the theory" Rose said as all of us gathered around the cloth, but to everybody's disappointment it only burnt part of the fabric

Diana appeared then asking to leave

"What are you doing?" she wondered as she and Monroe inched closer

"I'm trying to help Rosalee and Eve see something"

"See something where?"

Trubel pointed to the fabric sitting on the table "On this very old cloth"

"It has some writing on it and we are trying to read it" Rose offered

"Can I try?" despite my protest, Diana's eyes turned purplish blue as she stared at the cloth "I can see it"

"What can you see?" Eve prompted her

"Lots of stuff"

I looked back and forth not seeing anything "Can you tell us what you see?"

"Little pictures and strange writing"

Just then, Nick joined us in the basement, he explained that he had to make sure he wasn't followed before he came. Trubel told him Diana could see things on the cloth.

"Strange drawings and pictures" I said proudly, getting Nick's attention, we looked fondly at each other for a second forgetting we had an audience, until Diana spoke.

"You are the one my mom wanted me to talk to"

"Thank you for helping us" this was the first formal introduction they ever had, and it filled my heart with so much emotion

"You're Kelly's daddy"

"I am, and you're his sister" Nick added

"I like him" Diana confessed "He doesn't talk much" that made me smile

"Can you draw what you're seeing?" Nick asked Diana

"Sure" then she proceeded to do just that

Meanwhile, Trubel got a call from HW that seemed to make her very uncomfortable, by the end of it, she informed us she had to leave in two hours and asked Nick to go with her, which sent me on hysterics. I wasn't ready to lose him again. But now was not the time to think about it as Diana handed her drawing.

None of us had ever seen such a thing

Rosalee tried to find something on her computer but it was no use. We had no idea where to look and what we were looking for. After some time, Trubel said she had to go and asked Nick once again to go with her. My heart leaped and my throat clogged. What if he left? I had no right to stop him.

Nick glanced at me, probably seeing my worried expression, his eyes softened, then he told Trubel he couldn't leave. She insisted saying that he should leave, especially if Renard was still running the city, eyes on me Nick said he was going to stay no matter what and deal with him. Part of me hoped Kelly and I were the real reason he was staying.

The flutter in my heart didn't last long as Hank called to let me know I had to testify this soon given Sean's position. I was nervous all of a sudden, but nothing prepared me to what was to come.

The session had barely started when the judge decided the case had no reason to go to trial, Sean being considered innocent, thus me not testifying and the promise going void. Sean had planned everything and we fell into his trap. My head was spinning and bile rose to my mouth.

Hank and Wu were expected to resign the very next day and I expected the worst for Nick and I.

"You have to move back with him" Nick instructed me once we were back to the spice shop

"What? No, I hate him" I pleaded, my eyes already watering. Didn't he care for me? didn't he want me beside him?

"He's going to come after me" Nick said with great pain "and if you don't go he's coming after both of us" only then did I notice his trebling voice. Understanding how much it hurt him to ask such a thing of me.

I closed my eyes, willing the tears to dry

"Bastard got everything he wanted" Hank sighed


End file.
